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2020.09.28 10:57 Buck_Joffrey Wealth Formula Episode 231: Should You Buy a Franchise?

Catch the full episode: https://www.wealthformula.com/podcast/231-should-you-buy-a-franchise/
Buck: Welcome back to the show everyone today my guest on Wealth Formula Podcast is Kim Daly. Now Kim, well she has been in this space, this franchise space for a long time, for the last 20 years and she's been helping people achieve their financial goals, enabling them to get into the franchise opportunities that are most appropriate for them. She's got a lot of incredible background but you know her skills are really matching a client's background interest and skills and ultimately life goals and to matching them into top franchise opportunities and so today we're going to pick her brain get some insight into what may seem like a daunting process, but one that you know I've considered. I know a number of people have considered in the past and with that let me introduce Kim Daly. Kim, welcome to the show.
Kim: Thank you Buck it's great to be here.
Buck: So Kim I want to just start out by asking you, like how did you get into this space as a franchise consultant? How did you arrive there?
Kim: I mean are you questioning that I didn't grow up saying hey I want to be a franchise consultant?
Buck: That's right.
Kim: Yeah I fell into it like you know a lot of people fall into their thing. I was an entrepreneur and it started many businesses and the first job and the only job I actually had after college, I was on my way to med school and I answered a classified ad in the newspaper, remember the classified ads? And it was for a franchise company and it changed the direction of my life.
Buck: So you were going to be a doctor is that right?
Kim: Yeah so growing up there were two things I wanted to be Buck. I wanted to be a motivational speaker and I wanted to be a doctor but like how does one become a motivational speaker really right so you go to med school and you want to help people you go to med school but here I am you know many years later and basically I am a motivational speaker I mean I inspire people to the dream of business ownership and using my own entrepreneurial experiences in the last 18 years as a franchise consultant and really becoming an expert and a voice in this industry to help people really understand what franchising is, what's the real value proposition, what are you getting, what are you owed, what are you not owed, how to explore franchising, how to ask the right questions, so that's what I do.
Buck: Have you yourself owned franchises and I mean I just obviously don't know a whole lot about your background but have you actually you know owned them yourself and is that part of the experience?
Kim: Yes so this business that I'm in called Franchoice.
Buck: It's a franchise isn't it?
Kim: Yes it is. It's like a franchise, I mean we don't have a franchise agreement we have a consultant agreement but it's the same setup. You said you're from Minnesota we are headquartered in Eden Prairie. So I am supported yeah I'm supported by a corporate office I pay royalties back to my back to my corporate office and so and they go out what they do is they go out and they contract with the very best franchisors. So they're doing all of the homework for me in terms of creating an inventory of opportunities that I can bring to people so that my full-time effort can be dedicated to finding investors who want to learn about franchising and then bringing the two together like a matchmaker.
Buck: Got it okay. So let's talk about first of all what is a franchise and why should anyone consider you know buying into a franchise?
Kim: Okay sure so you know a franchise investment really, I'm going to go for the investors perspective that's sort of the audience. So a franchise investment is all about buying down the learning curve of starting a business right because you're partnering yourself with people who've already gone out there and figured it out. So the entrepreneurial path is to create as you go right the trial and error the missed opportunities from spending time trying to figure things out and that can become very costly right? And that's why in fact many entrepreneurs fail mainly because they run out of money before they really figure out how to make money. So here on the franchising path where from day one you're gonna pay a franchise fee right which goes to the franchisor and that buys you access to this proven business plan, the initial training, the vendors, technology, a proven marketing plan and ongoing support. So it's this idea that you are in business for yourself but not by yourself. So you're not that entrepreneur out there in the wilderness chopping down trees hoping that you're making up a trail that you know leads somewhere good, you're paying a fee to walk on a trail where the path has already been created and you're going to be supported all along the way. So that's kind of like tactically what we're doing is we're buying this we're buying down the learning curve because we're buying into this proven business plan but ultimately when I'm really working with my investors I really want to make a connection for them to the partnership. So it's one thing to buy into a proven plan but it's another thing to buy into an organization of very strong leadership where the people that you're giving your royalty dollars to have your best interest at heart where they are out there every day looking to grow the opportunity keep your opportunity relevant to the times like a time like we're in right. I've always said for years that widgets will not make an investor happy long, term like buying a you know a particular business because you love the product. Leadership is what makes you happy as an investor. When your leadership can pivot your company in an adverse time can keep your company growing and keep it relevant to the competition and to the changing customer demand I mean we're in business to make money so that's ultimately what keeps your business thriving and growing and makes you money right. So ultimately what you're really buying in a franchise is you're buying a relationship.
Buck: Yeah makes sense so and let's talk about you know just comparing that and contrasting that with you know other options and for example you know I before we got on I mentioned you know I've started a few different businesses myself, I would say that it's definitely not for everybody to do that because I think there's as you mentioned there's a significant learning curve frequently. Your idea ends up either you know doing great or you end up losing a bunch of money and then you also fundamentally I think have to have a certain itch and I think that that might be a little different from your typical franchise person who's really looking potentially on something to say I don't need to be this guy who came up with this new idea, I just like this idea of running a business and I don't really want to waste a bunch of money I mean is that kind of the major difference between starting from scratch and franchising?
Kim: 100 so well said yeah right franchisees want to take somebody else's idea run with it and make money and you know I talk about building wealth through franchising and the wealth gets created through the scale like it could take an entrepreneur five years to figure out the business and get it up and going and in that five-year time period I could take a franchisee who could own five locations of whatever they're doing right because again not sitting and figuring anything out from day one you are going you're moving toward profitability because you have this proven plan in front of you and you're executing and you're being held accountable you know to execute and to go.
Buck: Yeah and then and then the other option of course is to look and say you know go to one of these sites like biz buy sell blah blah blah you know and take a business that you know that is currently on sale that may not be a franchise and potentially buy something like that. I honestly have looked in that space before because again just having some various interests and thinking I'll plug and chug let's do it. The challenge there I've found is being a guy who started businesses on my own, I know there's always stuff buried in closets that if you buy something unless it's a very very significantly large business with operations and things in place and management that you can potentially get screwed.
Kim: Skeletons in the closet.
Buck: Yeah right is that kind of and I don't mean to be giving you the answers but I'm guessing what the problems are with some of the other approaches to business ownership is that how you would is that kind of what you see in that space?
Kim: Yeah you know what you know what Buck I mean when I meet someone and I'm asking you know what are your goals what do you want to use this business for, there are many ways to skin the cat right? Franchising is just one option. I certainly don't try to push everybody into a franchise investment, it's not right for everybody and for that person who may be looking to recover a corporate salary let's say you've been severed from your job and you're looking to you know recover 200 or 300 thousand dollars in income like within three or four months I mean starting a business from scratch is not the answer right it's not going to happen so buying an existing business for sale could be a better fit but the thing you have to you have to know is that if you're buying a business that's throwing off that kind of cash you're paying for that right so multiple of that and so you that ups the risk because now you got to put down you know lots and lots and lots of money compared to if you have the time to kind of allow the business to ramp and like you said you get to be there for every you know hiccup in the business. When people come to me and ask me about buying an existing business for sale I say it's sort of like the difference between having a baby and adopting a teenager right so if you if you adopt a teenager and you haven't been there to like develop the personality and you don't really know like why they have a chip on their shoulder and other than that teenagers all have chips on their shoulders but like you know I see where I'm going with that versus when you have a baby and you're there for every milestone in that child's life and you're developing and nurturing that personality then when they grow up you know exactly how they got to who they are right that's sort of that's exactly what you were saying and that's sort of the difference between the two but I mean again I help people buy into existing franchises that are for sale so it really depends on the investors goals and the time frame in which they would like to achieve those goals assuming that they're realistic and that's part of what I do as their consultant is to help them understand what reality looks like and to make sure that you know any of these owning a business buying a business is the right option for them.
Buck: Got it and and so when you when you think about returns on these, well there's two questions I have. One is if you could talk about you know the cost and that sort of thing for franchises you know as a function of returns, how do you typically look at that or is it all over the board?
Kim: Okay so the first thing I'll say is as the consultant in the process I never ever make any earnings claims to anybody right it's just not my job I'm not a business broker I don't have a license to sell a franchise so I don't get into the idea of like answering the financial questions. What I do is I teach people what are the right questions to ask I'm not a big fan of asking a business owner like how much do you make because it depends it depends on their you know what kind of tax advantages they're taking advantage of it depends on how they finance their business are they paying off loans was it cash right there's too many depends on that question but so I'm going to teach my candidates how do you really learn the financial opportunity of a business more by understanding what owners are doing when they wake up to go drive that activity right. So I want to teach them how to turn every business sort of into a sales pipeline and understand like where do I apply the gas to drive the maximum speed in this business and you want to go to the top performing franchisees in a system to really hear what they're doing. Oftentimes people out of fear will say, you know I think it's out of fear they think well I'm going to talk to the people who who it hasn't worked out for and I'm like well you know when you turn to the people who it hasn't worked out for what is that really going to teach you. When you turn to the top performing people who've mastered the model to this point in its growth they're going to have a science to what they do especially if they've been able to replicate those results year over year over year. So they can tell you logically, not emotionally, what is driving their top performance. Now if you know what's driving top performance logically then you equally know why people in your business will not be successful so very often when you talk to people who it hasn't worked out for there's a lot of emotion and opinion behind their failure that I find often times no offense to anybody who's ever lost money because it is very disheartening right if you fail in your business but oftentimes it's not the truth it's just their truth does that make sense. That's a very evasive answer to your question, that’s all you're gonna get.
Buck: Well you know we're a group of investors a lot of times we want to we kind of want to cut to the chase. And along that line you know you had you mentioned okay well you're trying to you know you lost the job you're trying to replace income. My wonderful audience we many of us are spoiled rotten, we're just looking to make more money all right it's not a sob story it's just you know how do I make more money and and you know from a tax perspective I've addressed the the idea of business ownership many times, the problem is that I've got a number of investors listeners of this podcast who are making you know multiple hundreds of thousands of dollars multi you know even multiple millions of dollars and they are interested potentially in getting involved with business because what they're doing right now is say they’re a neurosurgeon making a million and a half a year and they want they want to do something in the business space but you know what frankly they're not going to be driving to work every morning they may want to be more passive they may be interested in potentially having you know some interest in managing managers but not really beyond that, are franchises something that can be relatively passive for individuals looking to create wealth through owning businesses or is this a all hands on deck kind of thing.
Kim: It's a great question and it's definitely can be used as a semi-absentee investment unlike starting a business from scratch that entrepreneurial route which would really require the owner to be there through every stage of it. So if you invest in the right type of business that is set up for semi-absentee ownership that can be manager run that would rely on the manager's expertise to carry out the day-to-day functions rather than the owner's expertise then that that could absolutely be achieved and that's actually how you scale a business and really build that wealth you know and you'll talk to people about you really don't need experience and some for some people that feels counterintuitive and I'm like well you'll hire to the experience of the business I need you to be the CEO who can manage managers who then will work in the business while you work on the business right. So in that semi absentee investor state you might be putting in 10 to 15 hours a week at night or on the weekends and it could even be less than that. There is a highly selective group of businesses that are really more of an investor's play, they're more expensive to get into. So there's always this trade-off of money for time right so the the less time the owner would be putting in the more infrastructure there has to be to support that business right the more time you're willing to put in as the owner the lower that investment could be because you're making up for that infrastructure with your own effort and time does that make sense.
Buck: Yeah for sure like anything else I mean I think the more you know generally speaking the higher the risk you know the you're not going to pay as much and if you're looking for things that are turnkey you're going to pay more so I mean it's pretty typical stuff. Let's talk a little bit about the fact that we are in a sort of you know an unusual time you know with this whole pandemic thing I don't know if you heard about heard about it and how is it affecting you know the types of businesses that you deal with or is it all over the board? I mean I'm curious.
Kim: Yeah it's been an interesting time and you know this is again when I say like widgets don't make investors happy long term but strong leadership in a franchise does. Never has there been a better time in history and franchising than now to be looking at franchising because you can really see where there are strong cultures and and strong leadership, where franchisees are not panicking there's been a pivot in their business model to maybe a virtual platform to a delivery service. So I mean I've seen franchisors eliminate royalties and turn corporate revenue streams like through online purchases to back to their franchisees reducing royalties like all kinds of things have happened here to help save our franchisees and by the best of the best franchisors. I certainly don't speak for every franchise organization out there I imagine there are some that are really struggling and the leadership hasn't really met the demands but in my little Santa Barbara boutique world here at Franchoice which is the best of the best in franchising
Buck: Wait Santa Barbara what are you talking about I didn't know you guys were in Santa Barbara.
Kim: Hey I used to live in Boca Raton I usually use that example Boca is like the most perfectly manicured places that's sort of like what we have here in my inventory. I'm not matching people to just any franchise out there I'm matching them to the best of the best. And the best of the best as validated by their existing franchise owners like it's one thing to be ranked in the top 500 out of you know entrepreneurs top 500 but it's quite another when the majority of the franchise owners that my team would speak with say you know hey I knowing what I know a hundred percent I would do this again you know even if you're not making the kind of money you got in for and they're willing to validate that they would do it again I mean that's amazing validation right and during your due diligence process as you work with me to explore franchise opportunities to find the one that's like the best fit for you, a big portion of what we're going to do is we're going to go out and we're going to interview those existing franchise owners and that question of you know how much money does it really take to get the business going and what kind of returns are there, we're actually going to address it to the people who've invested the money and who are making the return. The franchisor by law has to disclose this information in their franchise disclosure document so the federal trade commission regulates franchising and every year a franchisor must produce what's called an FDD or a franchise disclosure document, it's kind of like the prospectus for a stock right so it entitles you the investor to full disclosure if there's ever been any lawsuits or bankruptcies any fees you're obligated to pay and in there there's a section on the initial startup cost and there's also an earnings claim section. So we can pull numbers out of that franchise disclosure document but I always try to coach my candidates to understand that a document is just that right it's not a living breathing thing that a business is. So in order to really understand the story that those numbers create we have to be in relationship with the people, we have to be out there talking to the franchisor and then taking what we're learning in that book theory from the franchisor and validating that in the real world by talking to their existing franchisees and ultimately I don't know if you're aware of this but a franchise is not yours to buy until the franchisor has offered you the opportunity. So the evaluation that you're going through it's a mutual evaluation and ultimately they say hey
Buck: Swipe left swipe.
Kim: Right we think you're qualified we want you but do you want us and at that point then it's your business to say yes or no.
Buck: Okay so I am listening to this podcast and I'm like oh gosh you know has been telling me that my W2 stuff even though I'm making a lot of money then I need to consider having some business ownership possibility this franchising sounds really interesting this Kim Daly person sounds like she knows what she's talking about. So what happens when I reach out to you and we'll talk about how to reach out to you in a minute. The person who's reaching out to you, tell us a little bit about the process that they go through with you, what that looks like, what you do in the whole process you know and then presumably to the point where you're purchasing some kind of you know where somebody's purchasing an asset.
Kim: Okay great I love that question. So the first thing I do in order to bring opportunities to someone is I have to get to know them personally, professionally and financially. Who are you and what are you looking for, what are your dreams, what are your goals, what are you going to use this business investment for? Once we've clearly identified or outlined those characteristics through a basic questionnaire and then about a one-hour consultation phone call then I get to work and I go to go do some research come back a few days later with what I believe are the top three to five options that have available territory where you would like your business to be and that match those characteristics that we've outlined together. So then I would make a high level introduction between you and the franchisors I called this my blind date right blind date round it's like speed dating you're gonna start talking to franchisors you're gonna play the field and I'm gonna become your dating coach and I'm gonna teach you how to like keep your mind open and just go with the flow and have some fun there's so many ways to make money I think that's like the most fascinating part of my business is we get trained on new concepts all the time and it's like what are they going to think of next you know. If there's a business for it there's a franchise of it and there's just so many ways to make money. So once you go through your blind date round and you kind of get your bearings and you have some thoughts and opinions about what I have found for you then we start working together to to pair this list down and then I'm going to really get into the back end coaching like how do you actually explore franchise so that you can be competent that you've asked the right questions, you've done all the right things so when you're ready to say yes or no you can feel very confident in your final decision. And I work with candidates for about one to two months I've been doing this for about 18 years and I'm very consistent around that six week mark if this is the right thing for you don't have to spend six months figuring it out, no offense but no franchisor wants to date you for six months. We want decision makers we want to you know get in there learn the information absorb it move on to the next chapter learn the information absorb it move on and then complete that process and then just say yes or no. And all of my service I should have started out with this but everything I do Buck everything I do for people it's free.
Buck: Okay because you're because you're ultimately like a you know like a real estate agent then right?
Kim: I’m like an executive recruiter like for franchising.
Buck: Right so they they pay you.
Kim: The franchisor yeah so it's free. People are like really you're not going to hit me with a backend fee? Never. I'm going to offer you all kinds of coaching but on the flip side of that, what I tell people is when they get if they get argumentative with me I'll be like, you're not paying me any money and you don't have to take any advice I'm ever going to give you right there's no reason for me to mislead you but ultimately it's your life it's your decision so I'm just here to guide you if you want my guidance but at the end of the day people are making decisions on their own.
Buck: Yeah understood. Let's talk about what goes into that. So you make the introduction but it doesn't just end up with an introduction right you mean you you're gonna do some due diligence together you're going to say well how you looking at this these are the issues that you're you know that you need to look at okay let's let's look at their uniform circular or whatever those things are called what are the things I need to look at I mean I presume all that's part of the the the process from the consulting side absolutely yep and it used to be called a uniform franchise offering circular excuse me and then it got changed to the franchise disclosure document. So you have looked at franchising before.
Buck: I told you you know I have I mean I have entrepreneurial ADD and so I've looked at anything and part of what makes me pretty good at what I do on the investing side is my you know my my desire to constantly be looking at things so yeah I have looked at very briefly I mean I've never really learned enough I've learned enough to be dangerous where I could you know I may have gone to directly to a franchise and said yeah I wonder what it would be like to own a bunch of subways and then they sent me a big you know packet which was called the uniform circular at one point and I was like yeah I'm not gonna go look through this I'm not gonna.
Kim: No I save people time I mean ultimately yes if you're going to sign a franchise agreement I think you do need to have familiarize yourself with all parts of that franchise disclosure document but that's where I come in so I'm going to help you go you know I tell people look in the beginning when you're dating multiple franchisors you want to know what's in it for you and what's in it for you is the money so we're just going to pull the money out of that FDD first and we're going to play with the money of the investment and the ROI because if that doesn't make sense you're not going to want to go any further why do you need to know how you're going to sell your business which is part of the FDD if the numbers don't make sense for you right to even want to invest in it. So that's what I do I help save people time and focus them on what's important, I'm going to teach you when it's time to go interview those franchise owners what are the questions what should I be asking we talk about the psychology of interviewing business owners because it's really important that as you're meeting people who own a business that you don't create a limiting belief for yourself about what's possible based on the people that you're meeting in the franchise right. I want to teach you again how to figure out how to drive that gas pedal to your own level of performance. It's something Buck that I did in my business here at Franchoice, I was an average performing inconsistent performing consultant for many years for the first eight years and then I decided to get serious in my business and really maximize what I could control and one year later I had built the largest franchise consulting business ever that had ever been built and so then I didn't want to be a one-hit wonder so then I really had to examine my numbers and figure out the science of what I was really doing to drive that result and then once I did that and repeated it for a couple of years a couple of other very smart consultants came to me and were like hey let me do what you do I gave them my science and now one of them goes on and doubles what I do right and now I also share this science
Buck: So this is your, you came up with this franchise? This is your franchise?
Kim: No I just jacked the level of performance in my business
Buck: So you’re like a super Mcdonald's
Kim: Yeah like let's say that let's say that you're validating a business and the average owner you're talking about is I'll use basic numbers just pulling out a hundred thousand. I don't want my candidates to feel like that's a limitation like I can only make a hundred thousand there should be no limit, I mean if you have a if you in some businesses there is an actual cap to how big one location can get and then that's why you'd have to build you know two and three and four and five locations, but that's what I'm explaining that just because the average person in a franchise is performing to a certain level that's not all that's possible, there's always going to be one person who can break free from the pack and produce twice as much or three times as much as everybody else and when you're validating a franchise I want my candidates to go to those people who've broken free from the pack the top 10 of the performers to find out what are they doing to drive that type of result rather than kind of settling for well okay the average performing person is doing this and so that's kind of the number I have in my head I just think that that's a that can be a very limiting belief to begin your business with.
Buck: Understood. Well good. What am I missing? Am I missing anything? Is there anything that you think that we ought to know about this process that we haven't already talked to? I mean obviously there's a lot to it but as an introduction.
Kim: Yeah you know one thing we haven't talked about are the tax advantages that some franchise businesses can create. So you mentioned we talked about the investor mindset and coming in more as a semi-absentee investor and I have some people that have significant cash flow from a w-2 job and they're looking for tax savings or tax shelters with the business not even necessarily cash flow in the first few years it's more to create that tax shelter and I also have businesses that fit those investors as well so you can look at franchising as replacing your w-2 job like you've been unemployed or you've been downsized or right-sized whatever and you're looking to reinvent yourself right you're 52-54 and you're like listen if I go back I may get laid off in two or three more years so maybe it's better for me to consider just reinventing myself for myself at this stage there's that guy who wants to dive in full term and full time and maybe over time become a semi-absentee owner but then there's the investors such as you mentioned like you know physicians or people that have thriving businesses that are making a lot of money but those to make that money it requires their time and attention like my business requires my time and attention so I have other passive investments that don't require Kim I'm passionate about what I do and I want to be here but you know there's some point in my life where no offense to my people but I don't always want to have to be tied to my desk in order to you know have income coming in so we all have to consider ways to build that revenue that doesn't require us to wake up and exchange our time for money right. And then so there's that investor mindset and a lot of those those investor mindset businesses also as I mentioned can come with some pretty good tax advantages for those people who again are trying to offset big income they're making in their w-2 job or other investments.
Buck: Yeah I mean you know specifically I think you know we talk a lot about tax efficiency in this this program you know a lot of people are going to be interested in I think a couple of things one is you know the potential depreciation and elements of that but also to look at these opportunities as potential passive assets and start building those buckets of passive income up that we can do a lot more with so very interesting stuff. Kim how do we get a hold of you?
Kim: Okay so my website is thedalycoach.com and that's my last name d-a-l-y the daily coach. I love to give people a little daily dose of Kim Daly on my website. I have videos I have testimonials I mean I cover all kinds of business coaching subjects in my video library I have testimonials where I've gone into the storefronts of people that I've helped change their life and some of the work I'm the most proud of, I love all of my people to death so I ask everybody even those people who didn't buy a franchise but they learned something through my process write me a testimonial. So you'll see hundreds of testimonials and all kinds of you know resources books and other things that you may want to check out and also the contact me form so if you are interested in starting your journey how do you know you're curious you want to learn more about franchising absolutely I'll follow right back up with you and we can begin the conversation.
Buck: Fantastic again that's thedalycoach.com and Kim thank you so much this has been a fantastic interview. I think we've got a lot of information here and hopefully some of you are going to go down this road. I may take Kim up on this and go down through the process myself by the way so I'm totally curious and you know me I'm gonna you know I've got my fingers in a lot of different things. So anyway Kim thanks again. Wonderful to have you on the show.
Kim: It's an honor to be here. Thank you so much.
Buck: We'll be right back
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2020.09.28 04:44 MannyTrejo 'Which media would you consider a life-changing experience?'

Originally inspired by a Reddit thread regarding media and how it changed our lives, I invite anyone interested in sharing that which caused them reflection or provided lessons that later proved relevant to do the same. I since expanded that far beyond the limitations of Reddit comments here: https://www.facebook.com/notes/manuel-ignacio-mier-aguirre/which-media-would-you-consider-a-life-changing-experience/129415288891059/
"Lest I forget to mention my own failure from following the same route despite The Wall by Pink Floyd being one of the pieces of audiovisual media I’ve most watched throughout my lifetime. My younger brother had perhaps already built The Wall within himself, by his own failures whether born from his use of worse substances than any I’d dare ever consume during our adolescence, or facing other trials lacking my or another’s wisdom I neglected to share distracted by other substances and my own failures to retreat and regroup effectively to tackle the problem I’d faced after being denied so many other paths I’d have chosen before the one I’m on. For months he’d pestered me with radical propaganda and politically-sensitive philosophy over topics I’d already come to terms with, and I left that vector of intrusion open feeling concern for his plight and worry, yet after a former amorous connection from abroad offered we meet in Spain, he revealed my folly for trusting in him and his true intention. Immediately after she had so offered we might meet, I was faced with threats by my brother and friends of his intimidating me, attempting to coerce me into accepting Catholicism with claims of violence should I not, falsely accusing me of being guilty of sin worthy of such punishment which left me perplexed.
Confused at the true source of the attack, the disrespect against me caused me to lose my respect usually shown to just about everyone else hoping to incite reprisal from the source, and I do apologize for any offenses made as brick by brick I built The Wall. And just as I built The Wall despite consuming that media many a time, another book I was reading at the time, Gravity's Rainbow by Thomas Pynchon held the answer for the paranoia I'd came to suffer upon detecting Maoism to be the potential source yet lacking knowledge of Maoist movements beyond Chairman Mao Zedong's history in China, “If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about answers.” And so, though I still disagree with some actions taken, yet have come to understand better why and decided to simply not even worry about them, only concerned the same doesn't repeat itself here against good people like myself, I do apologize for any offense to the states of China and Russia, and others closer-by but not former President Calderone, because fuck you I’m not going to die in a revolution for your rightwing Catholic oligarchy against leftist Catholic oligarchs, but I’m above the idea of bothering to waste my time dealing with you. You'll get your apology for my public denouncement of your foolish words, whether read by you or any of yours or not, when you rescind them apologetically for your desire to see violence while remaining safely away from it, or when you cross that border to be the point of the lance rifle in your own Catholic hands, where I would perhaps follow you if only out of curiosity to how this turn of events concludes, since already two American military veterans I believe better men than you have been jailed in Venezuela for one of your two desired revolutions. But if things fall to that state anyway, show us if you felt even a mote of that which did help form my soul as I lived in the United States living safely as a citizen of Texas, where I was kicked out just shy of graduating high school as I'd begun cardio training to meet USMC physical requirements eager to help fight religious extremism, deported despite having committed no crime myself, the only minor act of vandalism and offending a friend as a 13 year old dealing with emotional turmoil over new found desires leading me to egg an ex-girlfriend's house, issues I've long matured from since. Please, be our revolutionary George Washington to lead us across a Delaware that never freezes to sneak up on the paramilitary privateers. And I'd accept your apology, since 2020 and the pandemic has left many of us feeling our worlds become smaller and turned irater for it, some with too much time to think, others left to deal with the stress of keeping society running for the rest. Knowing the true enemy likely to be local organized crime, since even some IP addresses that attempted to penetrate some of my accounts purportedly from those nations may have actually been masked by a proxy. just like a virus the June of 2019 which left me having to reformat 2 hard drives and a few USB sticks had changed my browser language to Russian. Not only that, but immediately following my report online to an internationally active police agency my Twitch stream was restreamed to one with a name hostile to law enforcement I reported upon discovery, as an attempt to commit something akin to Swatting against me. Yet I'll withhold from claiming academic, private, or state collusion with organized mafiosos with cyber-crime capabilities akin to the Cali Cartel that succeeded the Medellin Cartel of Columbia, more successful for their more subtle manipulation and corruption of public or private officials compared to the previous cartel's foolishly brazen suppression turned outright war to maintain control, I learned another potential true enemy aside from organized crime I’d always defied and neglected to join despite my minor irregular moderate drug use was French Maoism of the cause the leader was claimed to represent by his peons, but not the nation of France, for French Maoists have also been involved with religious extremism and Maoist terrorism in India and have been deported from India for colluding with violent radical groups, or perhaps both of us as leftists were just turned against each other for looking upon the other through a scanner darkly, and not seeing eye to eye to converse over the same worries.
For even that same amorous connection I came to blame, to accuse with thoughts born of paranoia, to claim her in-collusion with Cambridge Analytica, the case closing up the same month she offered we meet, to claim her the Spanish, to have selected to influence a man into pacifism against soft imperialism through his favorite book, a historical fiction and science fiction novel, after noticing his household’s peculiar Amazon book orders. To claim her nation, among the highest consumers of Latin American cocaine, which she shuns as she does all drug use, yet claiming her through that exchange to be but in-collusion to England’s latest mind control plot after having Cambridge Analytica and its ploys to manipulate public perception through social media and psychological profiling facilitated by artificial intelligence shut down. A scheme reminiscent of England’s control over Chinese slave labor in the 1800’s, where the East India Company would impose opium addiction upon Chinese workers then offer to only pay them with opium and not any currency for their hard labor, but inversed, to better control the flow of cocaine even given to race dog Great Danes yet claiming the source guilty of that few among their populace buy gratuitously. To claim like when the Jews were thrust just having faced the horrors of the Holocaust into their ancestral birth lands to face enemies Great Britain had angered leaving them advisors and equipment left over from the Second World War to make of a colony they could hardly defend themselves, a potential ally should they survive, which they did yet I'll not be twisted against enemies deceived into thinking me 'the rich,' not look upon you so kindly should I survive them in a manner so valiantly to be like Israel continues to stand proudly today. Knowing my fate then would be more like Alan Turing's, a homosexual man vital to the war effort against Third Reich Germany for being a grand mathematician, to be chemically castrated after I'd stopped being useful same as she no longer invited me to share my physical desire for her and hers immediately vanished when I lost my cool and became irate, no longer a source of tranquility for her and words of praise for her that would once leave a flustered woman telling me I should write romance novels. And so, a tribe from which the man Jesus Christ of Nazareth hailed, after over two thousand years of being run from place to place to take up whatever jobs were allowed to them, even chancing upon banking out of luck the Christians of Europe didn’t like math because it was hard and allowed the poorer among them to see harsher truths when analyzing the statistics, till finally they should take up the sword to defend their ancestral home and never again be run from anywhere; A warrior empire tribe along the Southwest coast of Mexico was coaxed into shedding the obsidian by the book inspired by the man Jesus Christ, or the many he represents impaled upon the cross, perhaps of the last ones unconquered, an Atheist of mixed race, to be pacified by only a more elaborate science fiction tale and love for a woman. Till she recanted such offer we meet finally after 7 years, and only recently could we reconcile, yet despite her insistence we remain friends, I did feel best we cut the cord so I may better move on, and only did plead she remain open to perhaps making another plan for Spain should I successfully progress from the current pit I’d been led into and allowed myself to be fooled into. Still I’m glad we could speak face to face to quell my paranoid fears, and to once-more blaspheme as she’d coaxed me into joining her in a chant of ‘Fuck God,’ now relieved that perhaps my worse fear of criminal mafia-state collusion to replace me in her life and the potential political and economic plans I had entertained for our relationship was perhaps excessive, lest it be proven true by exactly that happening, by a criminal or someone preferred by a criminal for their ignorance or silence seeing the same but knowing me being innocent of complicit complacency or action with crime being a risk since I’m also prone to pointing out other’s acts of violent or abusive crime against women and vulnerable people such as children and the mentally ill like myself.
And I forgave her as she revealed to me how powerless she’d felt to make me feel better, to calm me, to divert the topic as I remained ragefully fixated with a vindictive appetite, leading to her not communicating sooner out of fear I’d simply bite a hand that would once caress me again. And she forgave me, but wisely made clear it shall not be forgotten, properly since another act to a former lover nearby also caused that shock with reality and reflection I required to ease myself out of a self-indoctrination born out of my own psychological and philosophical knowledge fused with theology, not structured to a title, but ample enough to do such. When I, knowing the threat against my potentially demanded by a French Maoist, with no relation to Chinese Maoism as I’d learned, if it was indeed a Maoist and not a criminal using the name as a mask, since even FARC was a criminal organization despite noble leftist intent twisted towards violence for financing through drug sales, responded to a younger lover’s claims and desires to accept offers from a French man she’d met before to leave for France prior to finishing her preparatory education. Where I feared like many woman with their education disrupted here often are, she would be prostituted abroad, yet I neglected the fact the same crime is committed to others here in Mexico by Mexicans, not just foreigners, still her tears and angered accusations of me a Nazi and a patan after I’d answered to her it was her Patriotic duty to remain and finish at least her preparatory education caused me to reflect upon my value of Liberty, and that I shall not become a hypocrite, by denying another their liberty. Another book, The Life and Death of Socrates, reflected upon concerning this, where Socrates was made to commit suicide for espousing the societal values of religion yet denying the fantasy such supernatural beings exist leading to accusations of perverting the youth, I found myself in another similar position as an Atheist also espousing rule of law yet wishing for some minor changes to it, in a place where power has corrupted rule of law and institutions academic, private, and public at many levels in some places, despite the current administration’s efforts to cleanse this and make of Mexico a changed place, still ongoing some chancing upon the PRI’s collusion being revealed to take their place or so I believe, likely without the upper administration noticing nor allowing this yet the executive power that is the Mexican eagle and the institutions of police and military might has too often come to be ensnared by many coiled snakes about its talons as it struggles to snap at them with a tired beak one by one.
I've since fixed the security errors that made past cyber-attacks against me possible, fearing our personal data to have been intruded, to laugh off the attempts to brute force into my Outlook account knowing the attempts require a second device to authenticate log-on, after months spent seeding misleading details as a joke and hope to call the attention of more eyes to this direction, still the grandest joke remains one played upon myself, as many were acts of disrespect I'd not have committed if I'd known with clearer mind I'd still be around months later, and not enslaved an indoctrinated drone to poorly paid farm labor for the foreseeable future. Thinking myself so clever for claiming falsely to be a Nazi and adopting ideals from another National Socialist movement that founded a sovereign nation and its ascent to increased geopolitical influence, crafting a narrative born not just of conscious negation of another side to it, but also my perceptual barriers lacking sympathy to the Catholic church particularly when threatened by Catholic Extremists, till recently I shamefully learned that the Polish Catholics whom shared the Jews plight against the Nazis were more than few I'd known of, but to be in-actuality in at least the tens of thousands to have perished alongside other political dissidents in concentration camps in a manner I'd never allow repeated here, the number of official Polish Catholic clergy slain by the Nazis, aptly the same number as the year of my birth dated anno domini after the life of Christ, 1992. Still the only Abrahamic religion I'll accept, should an offer be enticing to join them, or I face such desperation potentially with another lapse of mental illness not wishing to return to my own tailored self-indoctrination since it just made me more enraged and insane designed to take advantage of recently onset psychosis to negate the possibility of someone else indoctrinating me into Christianity, shall be Judaism. Till then, I'll remain a Taoist, and a Humanist Atheist, with some ideals adopted from the Sikh and their belief that all Gods are real if only in how they affect the minds of my potential enemies should they not turn friends, or leave me be, and my own, perhaps will remain a Taoist Atheist till I die. I’ll never again make such stupid insensitive jokes till now uncharacteristic of me since maturing beyond adolescence, now that I’ve got my better mind mostly back despite some damage leaving me with a difficulty to focus on arithmetic and programming, I was making strides of progress previously unseen towards last year before all these events spiked my mental health problems that have been usually more subtle since preadolescence. My intent was to claim myself one to incite the group that threatened me to act on their claims, then reveal that eugenicists, as that cause claimed, even attempted to persuade me towards, are indeed Nazis.
Ha-ha, look, its Dr. Sun Yat-sen but with a 16 year old companion in a state 16 is age of consent compared to one of the real man of past history, however appropriate it was at that time and place and not now, and his 13 year old wife, its Adolf Hitler but not a hypocrite since his ultra-nationalism did not become corroded by racism, to be a defense for the rights of Mexicans of every color and religion, its Cobra Commander as a playful reference to a bisexuality and sexual experience yet to be entirely completed, the former I've had to abandon, preferring women where most places that would embrace it immediately find me with many men encroaching upon my space where I'd father few if any, preferably only those ruder, meaner, more muscular, and bearded much like myself. I prefer sexual fluidity theory, so I can lie to everyone and uninviting homosexuals claiming myself heterosexual, and perhaps reveal that to the right homosexual that could fulfill either my dreams of a Francis Bacon the painter's physically abusive relationship, knowing the violence just fantasy better treated, or an older guide and tutor much like Ancient Greek apprenticeship was to some young men, the penetration of knowledge connected to physical act, to be taken as I would a woman since male bodies don't excite my member yet I'd not shy from another's desires aided by a woman's presence or chemical assistance, and always a heterosexual to all women except to lesbians who'd know otherwise. Since it'd be temporary even if come to be a life-long friendship, my marriage if it is found, if this state deserves my seed, to be with a woman whose chosen me without ulterior influence same as I've chosen her, meeting by chance as I met my first love, an English-Australian woman and other lovers since. Luckily I found a better stance than LGBTQ flaming pride I still support, for them, regarding my own sexuality with sexual fluidity theory, when I dusted off the 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell,' abandoned by the United States Military to be found by me at a Salvation Army like the many artefacts that adorned our family's first apartment and house in the United States. Ha-ha, look, its Diogenes de Sinope laughing his ass off at the many academics claiming him stupider because of their skewed perspective judging too harshly by the past to see that they want to see so they don't reflect upon their own sin, looking at irrelevant old documents, and through a scanner darkly. Snickering at the creatives claiming themselves original then proving otherwise for claiming my lack of originality where I don’t have to criticize them such, simply allowing them to put the label on their heads, while putting words in my mouth to safeguard their egos. Still, I do protect my ego excessively sometimes as well, but only because such systematic abuse makes it necessary, I’ll turn off the lantern when I’m confronted with honest men and women, and my disrespect was also because often the most honest men and women are those the rest would find armed and away from them to uphold their safety with the safety off. And laughing quietly with a small tear at how abuse has become so thorough and appropriation so in the hands of the abusers, at those who'd reveal themselves the oppressor for getting mad someone playfully take the mask of Ximen Bao, when he is more like a villager pointing out the elders and the village priestesses' abuse of women, Ximen Bao's mask though not belonging any one person, now that he is long gone but ancient Chinese history of a talented politician and hydraulics engineer to have tended to many overflowing rivers and removed institutionalized systematic abuse of women hidden by religion, perhaps more appropriately a certified software engineer or hacker, and uniformed policemen, policewomen, and uniformed military or their equivalent properly taking the place of Ximen Bao's guards and soldiers who drowned the village elders abusing women and the priestesses aiding them by selecting and coercing women for Habao the river God. Or those who'd become irate I'd take the mask of Diogenes de Sinope for doing the same when japing at other philosophers with more credential, where that mask belongs to those without academic title, even those with a criminal past like the real man's past as an exile for vandalizing, shaving off silver bits from Greek currency to accumulate and resell, but there is the mask of a particular Hebrew himself I'll never claim myself to be like, nor bigger than, not dare to take the mask of since that man born to woman of a man's seed showed a humble man could conquer an empire.
'And the UN, UNnazi-ed the world forever,' I could write an essay picking apart Idiocracy but it was not life changing, perhaps more the film inspired by events in Timothy Cavendish's life enjoyed by a clone broken free from her religious indoctrination before her confession and demise never knowing the connection to Timothy Cavendish, yet this slave freed from religious indoctrination, despite many attempts to kick my family further down the socioeconomic ladder back to where my parents began for their sons not accepting the commonly held ideals and their daughter being troublesome however smart they all are, did enjoy many more pleasures than poor Somni-451 did in that future cyberpunk North Korea. Forever grateful an emotional and intellectual connection, though it did not come to be physical as she'd once wished when inviting me to Spain, chanced into my life sharing my own favorite book as her bible once. Maybe I'll no longer dreamily think you Meronym, but you can still be Leonina Crowne, Mrs. Brown, Polina, and Donna, Audrey, or whatever other name she'd take under cover if you ever choose to care about what happens around you beyond sight, yet I do not blame you, a mother and woman with a career is no longer a wide-eyed blue eyed rebel I'd met and talked to till she'd sleep many a night turned morning. But no, John Does Not Die At The End, at least not by his own hand, I'd rather peeve someone off so hard they do it for me if what I speak is bothersome to someone who wouldn't more wisely incentivize me and befriend me to perhaps not do so and continue distracting myself as I did so contently before our connection was slashed.
And as I stared into the void of recent human history to see that which scared her away briefly to leave me feeling as if the globalist liberalism we'd shared had abandoned me to face religious extremism alone, the void stared back at me as my mouth watered before the roast upon the flames and delusions of a conquered Central America, much like Shadowrun’s post-Mexican state Aztlan, a result of a Mexican conquest of everything South down to a border shared uneasily with Amazonia at Bogota, Columbia. To turn of Central America that I was threatened with; poorly paid agricultural slave labor so Mexico may more freely pursue my own dream, an increasingly technocratic Nationalist Democratic state, which had previously been a softer more liberal and peaceful thought in the back of my mind as I struggled to embark on my own path to at least becoming stable and financially independent. And I took step by step the same path as The Wall’s protagonist, perhaps born of a psychotic break Roger Waters himself may have suffered, despite having watched him play it twice in Mexico City, the second time around with a bassist Second Gulf War veteran wheelchair-bound after the loss of his legs playing with him on-stage at the Zocalo.
Though I'd not accuse everyone, nor even everyone complicit knowing deception to be so possible in an informatic age where recently we learned deepfakes possible to super-impose the image of another over the original in a video, due to a scandal where celebrity women were edited into pornographic videos, showing us this is possible for any other motive, but that's why it's called the fucking mob kids, some places are clean, but where it penetrates it can come to ensnare and even become everyone unknowingly promoting and acting out the agenda of the few in charge of public perception and belief. Still, I'd always shunned away from power, fame, and riches, wouldn't reject them to do good, but never was interested, preferring to enjoy what I enjoy in-private, preferring to keep my ploys to influence more subtle and aimed at hopefully positive outcomes, until lately when I so erratically just plain stopped giving a fuck since after I'd chosen a brief dream among the many other dreams I held as an indecisive child for my future the schemes of power and corruption I'd hoped to avoid doing so still intruded upon my life, and I came to entertain the idea of my future to be a gray-haired Nationalist man someday vying for political power to cleanse a state of corruption, thinking how to come-up with my own catchy way to say 'La mafia del poder.' Wondering if jails still keep libraries somewhere, if you can still get your law degree to begin a potential political career while in prison, since some of my more brazen attempts at calling attention did have that as a preferable outcome over being tortured till I accept a false confession and Catholicism before being made to work a farm as a slave. Disappointed and feeling betrayed over having been treated such by another Leftism movement, supposedly a French Maoist among Mexican Maoists, myself a male Feminist, Democratic Socialist, and Market Socialist with some right-leaning Nationalism also keeping that Market Socialism aligned in some interests concerning not going too far with Libertarianism since doing so pushes everyone attempting some regulation towards wishing for violent revolution I still shun, ultimately being of the Center Left politically, and a man who would have enjoyed and loved to do agricultural work however grueling during his semester off even at low pay provided he wasn't forced into it and could leave come the end of the season. Even if it is a little more grueling compared to the last employment I applied for, which resulted in 12+ hour days including transit and combined with attending class for 6 months, so I could save up to buy an ex-girlfriend a huge and beautiful puzzle with some oriental inspiration like other art she enjoyed, myself a used laptop for classwork, and to buy tickets for us both to see Nine Inch Nails at a music festival I usually ignore because it's usually more pop and popular music compared to that year's set, a band both of us uphold as one of our favorites, since I'd love to learn agricultural work even as a skillset for a future hobby and I'd regretted not choosing horticulture as an elective at my university.
Who knows, maybe the cause behind the attack was really my insane Old Testament Catholic extremist of a younger brother turning me in to activists bordering on militants hoping they'd remove me from making him envious and having to hear an ass or two spanked and a woman's cry or two through our shared wall then thinking I don't deserve to do the same to a woman in a Spanish hotel room because I lack his philosophy degree or something. Man, we both really got to get out of our parent's house. I mention this because it seems to be a thing with him, a woman I dated but came to wish I'd treated more as a friend he'd made it a thing to descriptively tell me of how satisfying he'd left her when he'd fucked her as if I'd care and didn't know those screams and shudders myself, at a party with others present none-the-less, impressing upon me in a way it was clear he wanted me to feel envious as I laughed it off and said the equivalent of 'congrats, I guess?' Again he'd ask out a woman I'd more recently dated and was more seriously involved with after we broke up, to which she rejected and revealed to me how creepy it was when we got back together before ultimately breaking up again, once he tried to force himself into my room as she lay boldly naked atop my bed, insisting why don't we play some board games when clearly we were both set to fuck. I just don't know what the fuck is up with him but I've since forgiven him but never forgotten the lesson to not trust the younger brother who grabs the teapot to go and set it in the small courtyard of a backyard beneath the sole palm tree at night time ever again. Whatever, I guess he was sick of being Doctor Venture sleeping in the lower bunk bed beneath Brock's bunk as revealed in a flashback scene of their shared university years. Whatever, I guess he was sick of being Doctor Venture sleeping in the lower bunk bed beneath Brock's bunk. Go fuck off with your extremist friends, I'm not letting myself get that maddened over what turned out to be overblown again, but if I do I'm the fucking Monarch from Venture Bros replete with Monarch themed super villain costume to go tree hugging awaiting confrontation on some field set to be cleared, since clearly you can't trust people enough to fight for them even among Leftists, so I may as well go fight for trees that also serve as Monarch butterfly homes in the Winter. All that would be missing is a gravelly voiced woman or maybe a transgender woman to play Doctor Girlfriend, and a couple fellow weirdos to be Henchman 21 and the other guy to give the armed responders to our opposition to another field being cleared the strangest surprise. Maybe it was just that, and it took the collusion with a militant activist group to get me to feel inadequacy issues I'd gotten over in high school peacefully sharing halls with many women who'd rejected me over other dudes like any other weirdo, to get my brother to feel a little better about his ego despite writing such trash philosophy if what he's shown me is any indication of the rest, since apparently a guy can't enjoy things previously kept private without having it shown it was not so private after all. Still, I understand a woman's incapacity to comprehend and fear of me since I did say some weird shit fallen into psychosis, and forgive her however it made me feel abandoned in a time of duress, but perhaps it might be a chance to commit a Sophist act to teach a lesson to would-be faux-Sophists just wishing to see a man suffer for nothing more than their sadism."
Full post: https://www.facebook.com/notes/manuel-ignacio-mier-aguirre/which-media-would-you-consider-a-life-changing-experience/129415288891059/
submitted by MannyTrejo to socialistprogrammers [link] [comments]

2020.09.28 03:11 Xbox_Live_User Beginner's Guide to XSX/XSS, Game Pass, Storage, and More!

Welcome to the Xbox family!
The next generation of consoles is coming, as are tons of questions.
This post provides guides and resources that cover the basics of the current state of Xbox. If you're new to Xbox, read Xbox Live/EA Play/Game Pass first.
Before you proceed, please check the FAQ tab or Info tab from XboxSeriesX for more information, guides, and helpful links.

Xbox Live/EA Play/Game Pass

Game Pass Ultimate And XBL Conversion For $1

Microsoft currently allows you to convert Xbox Live Gold time and Game Pass for PC or Console time to Game Pass Ultimate time at a 1:1 ratio for either $1 or $14.99, based on your eligibility and up to a maximum of 36 months (three years). The estimated savings for the full three years if you buy XBL at retail price is at least US $359* (corrected).
A loophole in this policy allows you to buy up to three years of XBL, redeem it to your Microsoft account, and convert it to GPU. While you don't have to get three years, you save the most money this way.
Note: If the total time (XBL + Game Pass time) in your account is more than 36 months, use a PC to activate the promotion. Any time over the 36 month maximum will disappear.


  1. On your Microsoft Account, turn off any existing recurring billing for Game Pass or XBL.
  2. Purchase three 12-month Xbox Live Gold cards for your region from a retailer like Amazon, Microsoft, Costco, CDKeys, or others. Note: CDKeys is a "gray market" site that sells these cards at steep discounts. They're easy to use and reliable.
  3. Visit redeem.microsoft.com and redeem each XBL key. For each key, turn off the recurring billing toggle before you click Submit.
  4. Check that you have at least 36 months of time on your account (XBL time + Game Pass time).
  5. Visit the Xbox Game Pass page for your region and click Join Now.
  6. Click Join for $1 under Ultimate.
  7. Follow the prompts and provide your payment information when asked.
You should see that all your Game Pass and XBL time now says upgraded to Game Pass Ultimate in your Microsoft account.

Backwards Compatibility

The new Xbox consoles support all Xbox One titles as well as any Xbox/Xbox 360 titles that are already supported on Xbox One. You may experience improvements to load times, framerate, and resolution.
Kinect and headsets with optical sound connectors are not currently supported.

Expanding Storage

The new Xbox consoles have a storage expansion slot. Currently the only supported storage for this slot is the Seagate Expansion Card. You can install games here and play them directly from the card.
While pricey, cheaper third-party alternatives are inevitable down the road.
You can also use an external USB HDD or SSD to store Series X or S games that you aren't playing. You can't play these directly from the drives and need to transfer them back to supported storage.
You can use an external drive to play non-enhanced backwards-compatible games from the Xbox One, Xbox 360, and Xbox.
For a quick reference, see this diagram (courtesy u/beateride) and Xbox Expansion Explained for more detailed information.

Xbox All Access

Xbox All Access is a monthly payment option which gives you a console and two years of GPU. The Xbox Series S is $24.99 a month and the Xbox Series X is $34.99, in the U.S.
All Access involves opening a line of credit with a local credit issuer through the Microsoft-authorized service provider in your area. This means a credit check that usually impacts your credit score.
To see if All Access is available in your region, see the supported regions list.

Bethesda Acquistion

There is no confirmation on if Xbox will make Bethesda games exclusive. Phil Spencer said it will be on a "case-by-case basis" for console exclusivity.
All Bethesda games are set to be added and launched on Game Pass.

TVs, Monitors, And Accessories

Other Links

To request more topics or corrections, contact u/Xbox_Live_User or u/shannonxtreme.
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2020.09.28 00:50 Jonah_Marriner The Weekly Map Recap, Week 26 - Southsun Cove

Welcome to the Weekly Map Recap, a series where we look back at one map in the game each week. We’ll look with a critical eye at how each map represents its theme, proves faithful to its lore, and implements its design. We’ll see how effective its gameplay is, whether the art holds up, and the forecast for the map’s long term retention. With 52 maps to date, it’ll be quite the journey!
Links to the previous entries in a reply at the bottom!
Also, before we get to the recap, you should know that I'm currently conducting a survey on map preference. I'm currently still accepting responses - and I'll be publishing the results in a Weekly Map Recap Special article. Get in those responses while you still can!

26 of 52 - Southsun Cove - Level 80

Alright, so we’re on to post-launch maps. Southsun Cove is a fascinating map that is essentially our only Living World Season 1 map (though its inception came before that). As our first post-80 map after launch, Southsun Cove would set expectations for what post-launch content would/should look like.
Additionally, this map is a bit difficult to talk about because there are several key phases of its design/existence. It had an initial release in the ‘Lost Shores’ patch in November of 2012 (before Living World was even officially in ‘seasons!’), and then an intermediate existence between that and the ‘Secret of Southsun’ arc in May of 2013. After that arc, it had its current content (save for Southsun Survival, which was introduced later but is separate from the map’s content itself).

Theme/Concept - 9/10

Southsun Cove has always dealt with some heavy themes. Even from the first ‘Lost Shores’ event, where Lion’s Arch was attacked, the themes of the story dealt heavily with colonialism, imperialism, and environmentalism.
It’s hard not to see parallels with real-world events in the attack on Lion’s Arch and the subsequent invasion and long-term troubled occupation of Southsun. Within the game, the karka are blameless for their attack - fleeing from the Deep Sea Dragon like the quaggan or krait. We are also introduced to the fairly unambiguously evil Consortium - essentially an Inquest less focused on ending the world and more interested in profiting from it.
In fact, the Lost Shores event and invasion of Southsun allows us to play pretty clearly as the bad guys: disturbing a natural environment, strip mining it, clearing its forests, and slaughtering all the inhabitants we come across - with the final goal of destroying the karka’s social structure and ability to reproduce. It’s an unusual release in that sense - especially given that in the following Living World Season 1 the Consortium are ultimately allowed to retain control of the island.
In that later release, we are introduced to Canach. In his first appearance, he is essentially an eco-terrorist, attempting to destroy the Consortium presence on the island by agitating the karka. Although Canach is morally ambiguous here, I think we can agree that his aim - to throw the Consortium off the island - is morally justified. Private corporate ownership of an entire island must be seen as a moral gray area at best. Given the evidence that the Consortium is a caricature of a corrupt company, I think it evident that their long term ownership of any large private land base is a bad idea.
So in summary, Southsun Cove has dealt with and continues to deal with a lot of big meaty themes. If you’ve only ever visited the island once or twice and missed the story, it would be easy for these themes to go unnoticed: the map today is essentially just generically a resort under threat from local wildlife. Current players may not realize that we struck the first blow, in a real sense - the attack on Lion’s Arch was a flimsy excuse to extend the Consortium’s control.

Lore - 2/10

This is one of the big points that longtime fans of the franchise hold against Southsun Cove. It has no relationship to any previous lore, even in a geographical sense. The island appeared essentially ‘out of thin air’ on the world map, bringing into question the extent to which we can expect the developers to rely on previous lore. This actually caused quite the debate when the map first made it into the game.
We know today that the map itself was originally going to be largely underwater in early design conceptions - which would have fit in our understanding of the world map here. But looking at the map today, it breaks immersion in some key ways; for example, how was this large idyllic island not colonized by Krytans or quaggan/krait/others before the karka arrived? How was it something that we only heard of in Lost Shores despite the supposed passage of shipping traffic in the Sea of Sorrows?
(A side note: this has always been a problem with the lore around pirates in Guild Wars 2. If there were so many ships in Kryta that extras could be used as architectural material for Lion’s Arch and other areas, who on earth were they pirating? There can’t have been enough shipping post-asura gate and post-rising of Orr to provide for all those pirates. Who are current pirates in Bloodtide Coast and other areas preying on? Most shipping seems to have moved to asura gate. What cities would even ship goods to each other by boat, other than Garenhoff, Rata Sum, and Lion's Arch?)
But at any rate, Southsun Cove has created some interesting new lore about the Consortium and the karka themselves. I use lore here fairly loosely - neither of these things is super relevant to the story of the game. Perhaps the most engaging lore in Southsun has to do with the oblique references to the Deep Sea Dragon - which may become more relevant in the upcoming expansion, End of Dragons.

Design - 5/10

This is one of the few design sections we’ll have where the design is really separate from the gameplay. We know that in general Arenanet teams prefer to work closely and collaboratively across disciplines: artists working with gameplay designers with programmers etc.
In the case of this map it’s hard to imagine how the environmental designers could have worked closely beyond a broad sense with the gameplay designers for the “permanent” events that live there today. It is likely that the gameplay designers were very focused on how to implement the crazy (brilliant?) idea of a one-time island invasion meta chain in a satisfying way. They likely didn’t have the time to do more than sketch out what events might eventually be the ‘permanent’ ones.
From the upper atmosphere, the design of the playable map area would look like a spiral, starting from the center north and curling around towards the east, brushing the south-east, before curling up towards the south-west and then the center-west. The path of the player generally curves upwards vertically, starting from the tidepools and climbing to the heights of the karka hive. This presents a very clear picture of the intended progression of the Lost Shores invasion meta event.
In the second release, large sections of the map got new settlements or more elaborate settlements. Additionally, caves in the interior of the island got some new content - though not as much as might have been expected. Even in these new settlements though, there’s not really that much to see and do since the Living World Season 1 events left.
In the initial Lost Shores release, players arrived on the two ships in the north and north east, and then progressed to the hill in the northeast. They cleared the local forest, and built the settlement. Over the next couple hours, this was repeated several times as they progressed closer to the karka hive. There was a temporary wall of superheated air blocking players off from the hive, and past that players blasted open an entrance and then lured the Queen to them. After killing the Queen, the Consortium announced ‘Mission Accomplished’ from their aircraft carrier.
Between the original release and the second, there were no events whatsoever on the island.
During the second release, there was a series of events based around factions of settlers fighting each other, and then the introduction of the modern meta revolving around defending the settlements and attacking the Queen. For some reason, following the Living World episode, the settler conflict events were removed - reducing the permanent events on the map to 17 (including failure events).
In a broad design sense, the environment itself is fantastic. There’s a good use of verticality, caves, and rock formations to create distinct areas across the map. It is always easy to tell where you are on the island, yet each area also appears part of a larger whole.
The interaction between the design and the event structures, on the other hand, continues to feel empty relative to the space.

Gameplay - 4/10

Okay, so again we’ll need to look at this in phases.
In Phase 1 (the Lost Shores release), this map had some very spotty - but ambitious! - gameplay. It is remembered today largely for the widespread lag and crashes associated with it. I personally was able to stay on the map until the Karka Queen herself, at which point I crashed and missed the loot. This was not an unusual experience.
But all that said, the thrill of - in real time - colonizing the island was really neat! The execution was messy, but it was an exciting thing to be a part of and a real example of a ‘Living World’.
In Phase 2 (between releases), Southsun Cove was an empty and desolate place. It was a key component of early arguments against the Living World Season 1 model: some players used it as an example of how temporary events led to a long-term dearth of content.
In Phase 3 (Secret and Last Stand), Southsun Cove was at its best: it had a (small) dungeon, it had crab toss, it had lots of interesting npcs visiting, a number of events.
But then in Phase 4 (following Last Stand), much of that was taken away. Half the events were removed, as well as many of the npcs. The dungeon was expunged. Since then, it has remained a farming spot for karka shells and guild events - and little else. The defend events are actually satisfyingly challenging - but perhaps overtuned for solo players.
It’s worth noting that the jumping puzzles in Southsun Cove are a lot of fun. One is more difficult and is a great example of a tougher-but-fair puzzle. The other is quick, easy, and fun.

Art - 9/10

Here’s where Southsun succeeds in spades. As a map that wasn’t really connected to any other content - and which still hasn’t really been used as a source of recycle assets in a major way - Southsun is like nothing else. It’s gorgeous and unique. It really captures the feeling of a tropical island in a way that other ‘tropical’ areas (vanilla Maguuma) don’t really replicate. It feels desolate, raw - the volcanic rocks as threatening as they are beautiful.
Of special highlight are the natural smokestacks, tidepools, and karka hives - not to mention the dynamic weather (which was a first at the time).

Long Term/Retention - 5/10

Southsun Cove is perhaps doing better than it deserves. That sounds unfair, but this is a map that has less than 15 ‘real’ events (not counting fail state events) and no real reward structures. There’s no npc here which offers to trade for a map currency, or any real long-term system of any kind. What there are are a number of unique and valuable crafting materials - and a world boss that is often done at reset. Amusingly, the fact that we only come to this map to slaughter karka for their shells plays well into the imperialist narrative.
Oh, and weirdly enough there isn’t really any signpost in the game that points new players to Southsun. You sort of need to discover it by word of mouth. That makes it highly unusual, and potentially depresses the retention somewhat - though players aren’t missing out on too much.

Overall - 5.5/10

Southsun Cove’s quality really depends on when we’re talking about it. At launch, it represented a fascinating attempt at what the Living World could be - paired with a karka nest’s worth of bugs and limitations. From then until the later updates, it was essentially wasted space. Now it’s found a middle ground, and provides a snapshot at early post-launch environmental design. Filled with assets that have never been replicated, untied to any major storyline, and with no clear guide that points new players there, Southsun Cove is the oddball of the post-launch map family. On a personal level, I love it for its oddness.
That's all, folks! What do you think of today’s map? Any fond memories, or strong complaints? How well do you think this map stands up in comparison to all the others? Better get your scarves and goggles ready becaue next week we'll be headed to Dry Top.
Don't forget that survey!
submitted by Jonah_Marriner to Guildwars2 [link] [comments]

2020.09.28 00:49 Hero3239 The N.I.C>E group falls apart. Part four of the neckbeard fanfic series.

Greetings Moonhorse and everyone in the Mooncult. I have come back from the depths of my desktop to bring part four of this continuing Neckbeard fanfic series. This story is a little longer than my previous ones so I apologize if it's too long but I will say that I tried my best to make it even better than my previous three. I hope you all enjoy but before we continue my (imaginary) lawyer has advice me to make a disclaimer. This reddit user is in no way sponsored by any of the games or animes that have been mentioned in the following fan fiction. He just really likes them and highly recommends them. Now that all the legal text is out of the way please enjoy the story.
When we last left our intrepid gang of socially inept, entitled, spoiled gang of misfits, uh heroes. They had met on the sidewalk of destiny to form the group of Neatly Intriguing Collective of Eccentric Gentlepeople or N.I.C.E since the characters to say the group title takes up more than eleven characters. For a brief moment the group was working well together. They were talking with each other and finding out more about each other. Sure, they didn’t really pay attention to what the others were saying as it had nothing to do with them, but they made it seem like they were acknowledging it. Their most talked about topic was their plan to get back at Rebecca and Stephany for daring to reject their romantic advances. They had all shown their dedication by paying for things or giving them discounts or saying how good they would be as a couple. Now one important thing had not come up during these talks and messages to each other. Jason and Trudy had described Rebecca in different ways. Jason had described Rebecca as a girl with a voluptuous figure and hips meant for bearing his child, blonde hair that was as soft as a silk blanket, and just enough nerdiness that she was the ultimate 3D waifu. Trudy described Rebecca as a goddess that had blessed them with her presence, bouncy golden hair crafted from the sun itself, and a smile that could light up the room. Sure, Rebecca didn’t really smile at Trudy a lot, but she would see Rebecca’s smile with some of her other ex-coworkers. Neither knew that they were talking about the same person. Their parents were happy that the three were actually hanging out and being friends. It was much better than just hanging out in their room. Sure, they were still staying in their rooms from time to time, but it was an improvement.
As their plan grew in fruition, the cracks in their group began to show. In all honesty a group full of narcissistic personalities should have fallen apart ages ago. It was a miracle that they could actually hold the group together. Every other conversation would turn into an argument. Trudy and Tyler got into arguments about Tyler’s sexism. He would denounce her ideas and make comments about how she should just leave the planning to the men. Her emotions would only interfere. Even though this whole plan was being formed on emotions alone. She would snap back about how he was a sexist pig and how Stephany would never fall for a pig like him. Jason and Trudy would argue about who had it worse in life. All the hard work they had to do and such. Even Jason and Tyler, who were buddies in prison, had arguments about which pickup lines were cringy and which would actually work. Jason lived by the negging code. Tyler told him he is a moron. The only thing uniting the group was their desire to show Rebecca and Stephany that they were the only ones for them. Of course, the members of the group weren’t above throwing the others under the bus to achieve their goals. So, for now, the group would work together to achieve their goal. For much of the time, they would stake out and ‘observe’ stalked their targets. They knew Rebecca and Stephany’s schedules on when they got to work at the veterinary clinic, when they left, and even when they stopped at Trudy’s old place of work.
Tyler was stunned to see that Stephany actually achieved her goal of getting into a veterinary school. He was so sure that she wouldn’t get in because she rejected him and therefore all the bad things had to happen to her as is the rule of karma. He had been so nice to her and she just ‘used’ him therefore she should have her dreams crushed since she didn’t date Tyler. Jason had gotten a smug satisfaction that Rebecca got her just deserts for sending him to jail. He just knew that her husband would break her heart and he was right. According to Trudy, Steven had cheated on her just like he predicted, and she got fired from the dreadful workplace of Generic office corp. Serves her right. Something was wrong with this, however. Why didn’t she try to find him and beg for his forgiveness for her insolence? Didn’t she realize how wrong she was with that cheater and how it proves that he was just the guy for her? They both knew she was wrong for marrying Steven and yet she never sought him out. Could it be that even if Steven wasn’t the one for Rebecca, she still had personal choice and Jason just wasn’t compatible with her? A ludicrous idea! How could he think of such a logical conclusion that didn’t align with his goals of sleeping with Rebecca?
Trudy had been able to watch Rebecca for hours as they stalked the two targets. Neither her nor Jason had put it together that they were both individually stalking the same person. All Trudy could focus on was how she would get her goddess to notice the mistake she made in the coffee shop and how they could still be like the characters in her fanfiction. ‘Claule’s finest wedding day! A Claule, battle for a fallen kingdom fanfic’ was the name of it. In the totally original, totally not Mary Sue self-insert fic. Trudy had written her character who shared the same name falling in love with the lead of a fantasy anime female by the name of Valbella Liana. She was an Elven warrior who was destined to bring peace back to her kingdoms after her traitorous brother, Sarjeon Liana, had stolen her rightful place on the throne and plunged the kingdoms into chaos by aligning himself with the dark gods. In the fanfic Trudy had single handedly beaten Sarjeon and the dark gods without the need of the legendary sword as she was just that awesome and she couldn’t actually give a plot reason as to how she got her powers. She was just too cool to lose. Valbella was just so smitten by Trudy’s heroic actions that she uncharacteristically professed her love for Trudy and the two got married that very next day. Everyone attended the wedding and gave the ‘lovely’ couple lots of gifts as Trudy was just that popular. The warrior queen walked with Trudy down the aisle and they lived happily ever after. She was determined to get Rebecca to fill the role of Valbella. She would finally have her happily ever after despite the fact that Rebecca didn’t like her for the creepiness.
The group was planning on stalking the two unsuspecting girls yet again this day. They had finally formulated a plan on how they were going to confront the two when an alarming Facebook post was found by Jason and Tyler since Rebecca had not blocked Tyler and vice versa for Jason. The Facebook page that alarmed them was a status change by both Rebecca and Stephany. It now read in a relationship with each other. Rebecca and Stephany’s relationship had been a steady growing one since they met in the coffee shop. They had grown to be fast friends. Rebecca would show Stephany some cute multiplayer games like Slime Rancher, and some story games like Long Live the Queen. Stephany had a really good time playing them with Rebecca and as such she showed her some animes she liked such as Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, and One Punch Man. She even showed her a childhood few anime like Yu-Gi-Oh! and Pokémon. Rebecca liked the childish animes, but it was very obvious that it was for children. Still she could get a good laugh at some of the localizations and voice acting. She was a little more hesitant with the other anime that was recommend but after they watched them, she was glad she did. There were a couple of emotional moments during the viewing of Fullmetal Alchemist. The two had found so much in common and felt that their personalities clicked enough that they went on a few dates to see if they were compatible. They went to the movies, hung out and played cooperative games, and even went out to dinner. They had gone on five dates before they decided to be a couple. They were incredibly happy together and Rebecca had come to terms with what Steven had done to their marriage, so she wasn’t hesitant to fall back into love.
A group meeting was called to discuss this horrid new finding. They met at Tyler’s house as his parents had gone out of town for the weekend and they wouldn’t be interrupted. Tyler’s room was about the size of a master bedroom and had a lot of nerdy things all around like anime statues and posters. One section of the wall had commissioned art with him and his waifus. Some was scammed art her got from artists he had tricked, and other pieces were traced by him that he had printed out. At a certain part on the left wall the art merged with pictures of Stephany that Tyler had acquired. Some were just pictures of her from Facebook or Instagram and others were badly photoshopped images of him and Stephany in typical couple poses.
“This can’t be happening.” Jason said as he and Trudy arrived in the room with Tyler closing the door behind him.
“I don’t like it either.” Tyler remarked. “I’m stunned that they found each other and started dating rather than finding us.”
“So, what are we going to do?” questioned Trudy.
“We continue the plan. If we confront them when they leave work, then we can show them that they made a mistake dating each other and that they should be with us. If they refuse, we show them what happens when you cross us Nice people.”
“Good. Soon Rebecca will see that she was wrong in dating Tyler’s girl and will come crawling to me to beg for my forgiveness and will want to be my girlfriend once she see how good I can treat her.” Jason said smugly as if this plan had any actual chance of working.
“Uh, what do you mean Rebecca will date you? This whole thing is so that Rebecca will date me. She and I are going to live out my fanfiction where she comes and sweeps me off my feet.” Trudy retorted.
“Uh no she’s not. Rebecca is going to be my girlfriend. I knew her first.” Jason angerly sputtered.
The two soon began arguing over who was going to date Rebecca while disregarding her feelings as she would clearly leave her girlfriend for one of them. Their argument pretty much boiled down to two toddlers arguing about who got the toy.
“Fine. You know what? I don’t need either of your help. I can swoon Rebecca myself.” Trudy declared before leaving. “May the best lover win.”
Tyler and Jason were the only ones left in the room but neither complained. They didn’t need her help. Trudy would probably just get in the way and ruin their chances anyway. They were going to get their true loves to see how good they were for them. The two Gentle sirs would bide their time since Trudy knew of their plan to confront their two love interests. If she were to get to the two girls first than they wouldn’t have a chance to actually work their moves on swooning the two as Trudy would just talk about her fan fics or something. Trudy, while leaving the property entirely, was going to go win Rebecca’s heart by herself. She didn’t need those arrogant pigs. They would have just ruined her chances with Rebecca by making some sort of sexist remark that would disgust her away from them. She should have never followed them. She was so much better on her own.
It was late in the evening when Rebecca and Stephany were leaving from work. The major patients of the day were a group of golden retriever puppies who had come in for their vaccination shots. Rebecca got to see the adorable puppies while she was helping the family check in for the appointment before Stephany came out to bring the family and their puppies into one of the examination rooms. The procedure was pretty swift with Stephany and one of the parents bringing in one puppy in at a time so that the pups wouldn’t be frightened. After the shot each pup was given a head pat and a scratch behind the ears for being such a good dog. The two girls walked out of the office hand in hand as they walked to Rebecca’s car. They had carpooled since their schedules were fairly close with one another. Their walk stopped suddenly when a rotund figure came out of the shadows.
“Hello Rebecca. It has been a while since you broke my heart. Who’s the harlot?” came a very judgmental voice.
“Trudy.” Rebecca said without a hint of her usual friendly tone. “This is my girlfriend. Stephany. What are you doing here?”
Stephany was very confused on who this person was that was addressing her girlfriend in such a tone. The stranger seemed a little familiar, but Stephany couldn’t remember where she was. The comment about being a harlot stung a little. This person didn’t know her. Why was she insulting her?
“Babe who is this person?” She asked a little puzzled.
“Oh, she didn’t tell you about me? I was supposed to be her girlfriend.” Trudy said in a rage as she approached the two. “I did everything for her. I gave you discounts; I liked all your posts on Instagram, I even attacked the trolls on your Instagram page. Yet you still rejected me and smashed my heart into a million pieces. And now here you are with this girl who is a two out of ten compared to me. What does she have that I don’t huh?”
Trudy was starting to break down as she continued to monologed.
“I would have treated you like the goddess that you are but noooooooooo, you had to go and reject me for some stupid reason and then got me fired at work. You should have just accepted my love.”
“Trudy I am not doing this again.” Rebecca said. “One. You got yourself fired when you decided to throw coffee on me at the coffee store. Be thankful you didn’t decide to throw hot coffee on me. I could have pressed charges but decided against it. Two. As I said before. I don’t know you that well. We only interacted when I went to order coffee. You didn’t know anything about me at all. You weren’t in love with me, you were lusting. You kept calling me a goddess which isn’t flattering it’s creepy. The only other thing you would do was stare at me while I was waiting. It was unnerving. None of those things would have helped my feelings for you.”
Rebecca began to squeeze Stephany’s hand as if looking for comfort. She was not one for confrontation but after dealing with Trudy and Jason, being nice wouldn’t get the message across. Stephany squeezed back but Trudy saw the two holding hands and it hurt her immensely combined with Rebecca’s words. Rebecca wasn’t about to let up as her anger began to catch up.
“I guess I should thank you however.” Rebecca stated.
“Why?” Trudy asked suspiciously.
“If you hadn’t thrown that coffee on me than I wouldn’t have met Stephany that day. In a way you brought the two of us together. So, I thank you for guiding me to my true love.” Sure, her words were getting a little vindictive but after dealing with Trudy’s stalking, Rebecca needed this. She would feel bad about her word choice later but right now, anger guided her words.
Those words were the last straw for Trudy. It was apparent that Rebecca was not going to see reason about how good of a partner Trudy was compared to Stephany. If Rebecca didn’t want to be happy with Trudy, then she would just have to make Rebecca regret her decision.
“Fine.” Trudy responded. “I can see you are still going to make the wrong choice. I’ll leave you and the little harlot alone for now, but I’ll make you rue the day you decided to break my heart.”
With that Trudy slunk back into the shadows and walked away. Rebecca breathed a sigh of relief as Trudy left them alone.
“What do you think she meant by that threat?” Stephany asked.
“I don’t know but I don’t think she will do anything about it. Let’s just head home and enjoy the rest of our night together like we planned. I’m still excited to see what new slimes we can add to our ranch” Rebecca said trying to bring up the mood. She didn’t know what Trudy meant by her threat. The two spent the rest of the night playing Slime Rancher and watching a movie. There was no need to get up early as they both had the day off.
Jason and Tyler were still waiting to see if Trudy had screwed up like they predicted. They watched her blog and saw her vaguing about ‘fake friends’ and how ‘Nice girls’ are always rejected. This was just the evidence to know that Trudy had failed in trying to woo Rebecca. Jason gained more unnecessary smugness after seeing the posts. Clearly Rebecca rejected her as she was waiting for Jason to return to sweep her off her feet. Couldn’t possibly be because she had a girlfriend that she loved and was currently with. No, Stephany was just a placeholder that would be cast aside when Rebecca’s knight in shining armor came to her side once again. Tyler could deal with the scraps. Jason was going for the big prize. The two were ready for their time to shine. They decided they would ambush meet up with their desired girl alone so that the other couldn’t interfere. Tyler would go to intercept Stephany while she was on break as Stephany always went to the nearby coffee shop for her break. Jason would go to Rebecca’s house hoping to catch her outside to confront her.
Stephany was working while Rebecca was off for the day. It happened from time to time and Stephany wasn’t too worried about waiting for time to fly. She did enjoy her work and seeing all the different people and pets that would come in. Every pair had a story. She remembers the time when this big muscley dude who looked like your stereotypical biker came in with a small kitten that had a couple of scrapes and scratches. Stephany immediately rushed to see what was wrong with the kitten and had the biker put the tiny thing on the observation table. He explained that someone had abandoned the kitten in the middle of nowhere and he was only able to spot it as it was near the road he was going down on. The biker seemed genuinely worried for the little guy. Constantly asking if there was anything he could do and if the kitten would be alright. Stephany reassured him that she would do all she could to make the kitten better. She did a full examination and looked to see if the cat had any infections. Fortunately, the scrapes and scratches were all that the kitten had. She gave him some bandages and a little bit of painkillers for the biker to give him from time to time. The biker thanked Stephany and shook her hand quite a bit. Stephany was a little worried that he was going to shake her hand until it fell off. The two walked out the receptionist’s area and filled out what they needed to so that the biker could get the tags needed for the kitten. Today before her break that same biker came back with the kitten who had now grown to be a cat. Stephany greeted the biker and he greeted her back. She brought the two into the examination room and began to do a routine check up for the cat. He talked about how he and the cat had gone on a crossroad trip around the United States on his bike. He had a little basket custom made on his bike for the cat to lay in and the cat loved doing just that. He would sometimes stick his little head up to look around at all the new scenes. Stephany was glad that he and the cat had become the best of friends since she last saw them. The cat was perfectly healthy and so she sent the two off with a clean bill of health before going on her break.
Stephany went to the nearby coffee shop as she always does and ordered her favorite drink. An ice-cold mocha latte with chocolate shavings on top. She was walking back to the clinic after getting her order when halfway between the two she was stopped by a voice that sent a chill down her spine.
“Hello Stephany. I see you still haven’t come to see how I am the one for you. Got yourself a girlfriend to make me jealous?” The voice said in a conceded tone.
Stephany nearly dropped her coffee when she turned to see Tyler. She thought she would have been free of him, but it seems that he somehow found her.
“What do you want Tyler?” Stephany sputtered out. “How do you know about my girlfriend?”
“Oh, I have my ways. I’ve seen your posts with her. I must say you do know how to tease a man. Still it’s time for you to see the truth. We both know that I’m the only one for you.” He said as he got closer.
Stephany took a step back as he approached.
“I thought you would have gotten the hint from our last interaction. I don’t want to be with you. Rebecca and I are incredibly happy together and you and I don’t have any chemistry. You only think of yourself and that was it. When we talked it was always about stroking your own ego. Then there was the whole point of stalking me. Here you are doing it again. I will never be into you.”
Tyler felt rage build up as she rejected him yet again. Why couldn’t she see that they would be perfect for each other? Was she so blind to the truth?
“No, you don’t get to make a decision like that!” He yelled. “I didn’t agree to being rejected from a relationship I want!” He tried again to approach her, but Stephany took up a defensive stance ready to throw him to the ground should he do it again. She had to sacrifice her drink but if it meant defending herself, she would do it.
“Tyler I’m warning you back off. I already flipped you once and I’ll do it again. I’m going to walk back to work and you better not follow me. I already told you that I will never love you. Accept it.”
“Fine. I’ll leave for now, but you will see the truth. Mark my words.” He said before backing off and walking away.
Stephany was still a little shaken up from the whole interaction as she walked back to the clinic. She would definitely have to tell Rebecca about this situation.
Around the same time that Stephany was dealing with Tyler, Rebecca was unaware that going out to fetch the mail would have her run into the man she thought was gone for good. For most of her day off she got some house cleaning down and then was just on her phone looking at some memes. She got a notification that a package she had ordered had been delivered in the mailbox. She was excited as it was a little stuffed animal kitten that she got as a surprise for Stephany. She walked out, grabbed the package, and closed the mailbox. Before she could walk back into her house and set up the surprise gift for Stephany, a familiar smell caught her nose. One that sent fear down her body like a cold title wave.
“I see I was right about Steven.” Came a voice from behind her.
She turned around to see none other than Jason. He had a smug satisfied grin on his face.
“You thought I was lying but I was correct. Now you see how nice I was back then. There’s still a chance to correct the mistake from back then. We can still be together. I will accept it as the apology for back then and forgive you.”
“You were right about Steven. He cheated on me with other girls but you being right about that doesn’t mean I’ll date you. I told you why I didn’t like you after your little tangent back at the office. You’re so self-absorbed that you would only go on and on about yourself and here you go again. Clearly you didn’t learn from then as you think that I would date you because I was wrong about Steven. I have a girlfriend now and her name is Stephany. We are incredibly happy together.” Rebecca retorted. “Now please leave.”
Jason when to grab Rebecca’s arm in the same fashion as he did so long ago. His plan was to get her to look him in the eyes in a romantic gesture he had seen in animes done by the couples. She was going to see how calming his eyes were and then hear his wonderful voice fill her ears with romantic words that would convince her to dump Stephany for her true white knight. Rebecca had a different plan, however. Stephany had taught her some moves from her judo class and Rebecca had asked her to show her some moves. She grabbed his arm and twisted so that his arm would be forced behind his back in a painful lock. Jason smug smile was erased extremely fast and he immediately cried out in pain.
“Ow! Ow! Let go!” he said panicking.
“Are you going to leave me alone?” She asked as she kept her grip on his arm.
“Yes! Yes!”
She let go of his arm and he moved away and began rubbing where the pain on his arm was. It was obvious that he was outmatched here. He would just have to make her see later. It wasn’t because of the pain she just put him in. No no he was to manly for that. He just needed a better strategy.
“Alright I’ll go but you will accept your true feelings for me soon. Just wait and see.”
And so, he ran off heroically to lick his wounds.
Rebecca was wondering just how Jason found her house or even knew that she would be home by this time. A worrying thought. She would have to tell Stephany about this when she got back home.
Our ‘heroes’ had all tried their plans and failed as expected. They now are all separated and licking their wounds inflicted by their love interests. Rebecca and Stephany talked about their run ins with our two male ‘protagonists’ and how they had ambushed them. They would need to do something about this, and Stephany knew just who to call on who might help them. Will our ‘heroes’ be able to over come their egos for five seconds to actually work together? Will Rebecca and Stephany be able to finally be rid of the N.I.C.E gang once and for all? Find out in the next exciting installment of A Tale of N.I.C.E People.
submitted by Hero3239 to MoonhorseStories [link] [comments]

2020.09.27 20:53 SwampFox82 The Covenant

The Covenant by Zeke Ortiz
Whether or not this will ever be published, who can say? It will be stolen from me by a GF of mine, But I know for certain that in the future they will remember me for just one thing, and that’s telling everyone that sodomy is an ultimate sin. Because no one who’s a part of something understands that.
I NEED TO MAKE PERFECTLY CLEAR TO EVERYONE THAT “I AM NOT A SAVIOR NOR A GOD NOR A PROPHET” Please worship God or Allah because they can save you from hell.
The Five Eternal Sins (things that send you to hell forever)
Molestation (Sodomy) – For molesting something, you go straight to an awful hell. A hell that you cannot escape. And never get out. If you truly hurt something in that way then you deserve to be prosecuted, tried, and killed.
Homicide – For taking someone’s life you go to hell. A terrible hell shall be yours if you kill someone.
Solitary Confinement – For imprisoning a living thing in such a way you deserve to be in such a bad hell that you’ll beg Allah or God for forgiveness and never get it.
Hatred – For hating someone or something with a passion you go to hell.
Doing nothing – And here’s how it’s a sin. Is because doing nothing just allows for evil to run your life and your thoughts. And when good people do nothing is when evil wins.
The Six Deadly Sins
Impersonation – Impersonating a deity is a mortal sin. Do no such thing. For it will send you to hell. Even if you do not realize that you’re not a deity – not for very long if you do not realize it, but you must realize that you’re not
False Worship – Worshiping or praying to something or someone that is not a God; especially an agent of evil is a true sin. Do no such thing. For all you will see if a terrible hell.
Gangstalking with Rules – For starting such a thing. Your existence will probably be destroyed. Because you’ll believe that the gang stalked one will go to hell instead of you. And when you finally get to hell, you’ll just believe that you’ve gone to heaven and never understand how it’s a hell even though it will be a hell to you.
Chapter #1 – Jozechariah’s Lie
And God said to me. “Do hard work for it will keep you out of hell.” And Allah said “Do not worship me.” And Jehovah said “If you had a son you’d understand.” I screamed at the top of my lungs, “But I am no pedophile!”
And God said to me, “But you must be, for Jehovah said you were and he is trusted for thou unto me.” “But I must not be, for Jehovah lied to you.” I said. And God said “Worship me for it will keep you out of hell, but you must do hard work and do as I say.” And I said “BUT I AM NO PEDOPHILE!” And I’m smarter than that, for hard work does not keep someone out of hell.
And Jehovah said “Worship me, for I will keep you out of hell and make you a good pedophile. For if you had a son you would understand.” And I whispered “For God and Allah may not understand, but I am no pedophile and Jehovah lied.” To keep his son “the god” out of hell again.
“For if you had a son, you would understand.” Said Jehovah.
And God tuned in from the future once again to tell me “For you cast Jehovah out of paradise, and for that are you remembered.”
And Jozechariah said “For you are a pedophile, but no you are not, and for I lied to God for you should not have sex nor get off.” said Jehovah’s son. “Yes, I am going to say it again, for you shouldn’t get off and you’re on a pope order.” Said Jozechariah. And Jehovah said “For I lied to God, for you would understand if you had a son.”
And God tuned in once again to stop me from writing this. But I am no pedophile and everyone on the planet was in on my good gangstalk.

And God tuned in AGAIN from the present to tell me “I wish for you to stop writing this, because you will go to hell but you are so remembered for it.”
And Johnathan Franks said to me “For Jehovah just appeared on the news to discredit the holiness of this book” And he said “He’s urging everyone to get in on your gangstalk with rules. But I am not for I believe you.”
And I said “But I have no idea if that happened, because no one ever has admitted telepathy to me.”
And Johnathan Franks said “But I believe you and you must go on.”
A little bit of current English for a second. I don’t know if Johnathan Franks ever “got in on it.” If this actually happened, then please shoot me. Because I will go to hell and God will have me raped constantly by my father and it’s going to be such an awful hell because I will lose something. Something I never did which was give my father oral sex and Jehovah assured me that he will force me to do it.
And the reason why this will happen is because God named a Prophet who was me, Zeke Ortiz. And Allah named a savior, Zeke Ortiz. And God wants my existence destroyed because he believes that I betrayed him in the worst possible way - sodomy. And even though I don’t really believe that I’m a Savior or a Prophet. I may go to hell because of Jehovah’s lie.
“But you will become a God” said Jozechariah. And I said “But how? When I will be in hell, condemned for your lie.” “And Jehovah said, “For you will be in hell for I put you there for six years, for you shouldn’t get off nor have sex.”
And Lee said, “Zeke, I’m crying. You won’t exist. God will destroy your existence. And we’ll never get to meet. I’m crying, because I believed it too. But I realized that God didn’t understand. You are no pedophile and I believe you.”
And Allah said to me “Stop writing this book, for it will put you in hell and God will destroy your existence. But I am on your side and God put me in hell just for being on your side. Yes, he is, for he is the most powerful.”
And Allah tuned in once again to say. “Yes, I am the God now, and I realize how to fizzle you back in. But you’re just a husk that is talking about Jehovah’s sin. And he molested you constantly. This is the saddest thing I have ever seen. You don’t wish to exist and why would you when all believed you had sinned.”
“You’re just a talking husk, and no one understands what that’s like because no one ever believed you.” And I’m so sorry about it, because this is the last computer you will ever have.”
“God appeared just once to let you have sex, and he felt your spirit and the second he did he realized his mistake. Which was never believing you.”
“But I am not Allah.” Said Geoup Kaleed. “And he made me Allah, because he trusted me but I was a pedophile, a “good” pedophile who thought he was helping children. And a part of the Saudi Leauge.” “For they forced me to do this, and I thought it was right.”
“For I thought I was helping those had been in bondage. For they needed sex is what I believed, but you never had it. Because this woman backed out because God appeared to inform her that she would be a God. Everyone became a god but you - just because of Jehovah’s lie.”
And Johnathan Franks of the now said to me. “You never had sex because the entire planet was in on God’s “good” gangstalk.”
And I said. “Then how is he God. Then how is he God. Because, God should’ve realized that a gangstalk was a sin. And God doesn’t Sin. So how is he God? Because I don’t understand.”
And Johnathan Franks said to me “I don’t understand Zeke, I had to get in on it. Because I needed Sex and when a man appears to you to tell you what to do named God, you have to do it.” “And I’m so “Set.” And I’m so set.”
And my soon to be ex-girlfriend tuned in again to tell me, “But no such thing is true.” And I asked “Are you saying this because you are in on it still?” and she said “Yes. And I cannot tell you.”
And Billy tuned in to say, “I’m angry that you’re writing this. Because you are a pedophile.” And I said “Fuck off Billy. Because I am sick of your shit. This is ridiculous.” And Billy said, “God doesn’t lie, so this must have been the case. And I’m in your good gangstalk.”
And Jehovah said, “For you will be in hell for I put you there for six years, for you shouldn’t get off nor have sex. And do not put this in there but I extended it for seven years.” I extended it to seven years, for you shouldn’t get off nor have sex.”
Victor tuned in from the past to say “No Zeke, you shouldn’t write such a thing. You are not a savior and not a prophet.”
And an angel from the future tuned in to say “You are not a savior but a prophet, who predicted sodomy was the worst sin.”
And Geoup Kaleed said “But you were a God this whole time named Orvastice”
[Maybe this wasn’t Geoup Kaleed in my head but it did have his voice.]
And I said “No. I don’t believe any of it. I don’t believe I’m a god, I don’t believe I’m a savior and I don’t believe I’m a prophet. I’m just an excellent person. Who believes that sodomy with imprisonment is this worst sin possible.”
And Geoup Kaleed said “Allah will never talk with you because he believes it too.”
And Lee said “But it isn’t fair. For Zeke truly worships Allah. And he never got to meet him because he still believes it.”
And Allah said “We all realized our mistake and were on your side.” And I said “I don’t believe that.” For you would’ve destroyed Jozechariah by now if you truly believed it.”
And Jozechariah said “Don’t put this in there for I was on your side. You just shouldn’t get off.”
And Allah said “This is just about his life is not holy. And I was on your side. But he talks with us too much.”
So, Allah never tuned in ever again. Even though I truly worship him. So I will pray to him every day. And I know for certain that god is making up lies in my head. But I truly was not a pedophile. And truly worship Allah.
And God said “I’m so angry with you, for writing this.”
And Patrick Stewart said – “I guess you can put this in there. But I’m no longer on your side.”
And David said “No you shouldn’t write this because I’m off your side and Jehovah’s great. And he has sex with you constantly.”
And I said “But that’s not the case! And I am no pedophile and just for the record. I am not gay and do not like you that way.”
And Allah said – [I DON’T REMEMBER WHAT HE SAID SO I’M SAYING SOMETHING THAT’S SIMILAR TO WHAT HE SAID.] “But you are not a God, so why do you believe that?”
And I agreed. ” I truly am not a God, nor a Savior, nor a Prophet. I’m just a lonely person who doesn’t ever get laid, because of some sort of gang stalk. I’m excellent. I just need lots of help.”
And I said “Please do not worship me. Please worship God or Allah. For they are Gods and can save you from hell. For I cannot.”
And Allah tuned in from the future once again to say – “Please put this in there, but you did not go to hell.”
Chapter Two – Jehovah’s Betrayal
As God realized what Jehovah had done. He screamed with rage for Jehovah could not hide his sin nor his son. As god got back on my side. He started screaming at Jehovah. “Where is he! Where is your son! For he has sinned and will suffer the ultimate punishment.”
“Yes, I am here!” said Jozechariah. “I am destroying your soul!” And God did. As God pulled Jozechariah soul out of Jozechariah chest and destroy it.
God and Allah sat down Jozechariah down from a different point in time to ask him one simple question. “How did you come back?” and I said to God “Jehovah stitched his soul together. According to yourself.”
“Oh no said God, he’s going to do it again. And Jehovah said “Yes I am for if you had a son you would understand.”
“Do not get off said” Jehovah and Jozechariah “For I will put you in hell, so you’re just like your father.”
And God said “
Suddenly God appeared and said “You’re going to hell! You’re going to hell!” to Jehovah
And Jehovah said “No! You ruined our plan.” Then Jozechariah turned back into himself and said laughed. “Yes, and it’s such a great plan!” “Jehovah then chuckled and said “Yes! And you’re going to rape somebody. Because that is our plan.”
Jehovah mocked the way I’m writing this and I said “So what, you think that hurts me?” And made fun of my stutter.
“Duh duh duh duh duh” said Jehovah and Zeke said “Do you think I care? This is a stupid way to mock someone.”
And Jehovah said “Well I’ll get right to it then. Your stutter [speech impediment] is gay, Zeke. GAY! And I’m going to say this too, but you’re gay Zeke, GAY!”
And Jehovah said “And you’re so gay in fact that I’m going to kill you for it.”
And Zeke Said “I’m actually not that offended for your disturbed and while I may be in hell, I can always brag about never rapping someone and always getting off by staring into the sun.”
And God said “For I came back and I’m so disturbed what I saw there. How did you set that up?”
And Allah tuned in from the future to say “For I am here, and I came back as well. And for how long, I don’t wish for you to know.”
And my future wife tuned in again to say “Kill me, please kill me for I went to hell for what I did to you.”
And I laughed at her and said “For what you’re going to do to me. I hope you go to a hell worse than anyone can ever imagine. And I hope God surprises you and doesn’t surprise you at the same time”
And Morgan Freeman said from the future “Yes she did for what you did to you. For she was not a God and thought she could get out of hell”
And my future wife said “I don’t even have a gun. I got a different wish from God. To have sex with your father all the time. And I hate him still:”
And now do you understand? Why you’re so smeared through time? Because this book did become famous and it smeared you so badly. And now do you understand why you’re in hell?
And she got the wish from god to have good sex with him just once. And god said certainly but you won’t get off because it’s not good sex even.
And Allah tuned in to say “She is an ass, a literal swine”
And Claire (and I’m using this name for her just once, JIanna Evans for I do not respect her and wish to offend her) tuned in from the now to claim that she is in hell and informed me a while ago that she has children in elephant suits.
“But she was not in hell. And is a liar.” For do not trust her I said. “Because she is a worshiper of evil.”
And my future wife tuned in to say “Oh no, Halls of the damned is still playing. I’m so evil too.” And then she fizzled away into a state of eternal suffering and pain.
And I said “For this does comfort me. But I just wish to avoid it. And I don’t know how. If she truly went to hell that badly. ”
A few moments later, Jehovah said over the levels
And Jehovah said “Zeke you’re not even listening. We’re going to make you so gay.”
And Jehovah said “Zeke, you’re not listening again. We’re going to make you so gay.”
Chapter Three – Gods Wrath Upon Jozechariah
And Allah appeared to appeared to talk with the Muslim church and scholars about his son, Zeke Ortiz. And they screamed at him, berated him, and begged him not to name is man, Zeke a son of his. And as they argued Allah held up his hand.
And they still kept arguing, so Allah held up his hand. And they kept screaming so Allah held up his hand. And then suddenly Allah screamed “Silence!” knowing that he had to. Because they wouldn’t have listened otherwise.
And Allah said “I am Allah and you will listen.” “Zeke is not your prophet nor savior, but a son of mine. And you will listen, for he needs help.” “I wish for you get him into the Saudi Leauge.”
And one of the scholars said “كيف هو ابنك - kayf hu abnak” or in English “How is he your son?”
And Allah said “I had sex with his mother, because she’d never “got off” before”.
Suddenly the Scholars of the Saudi Leauge erupted in protest. They screamed with rage and didn’t believe it was Allah anymore. They didn’t believe Allah would do that, so Allah held up his hand and they still.
Allah tuned in to say “
Chapter Two – Prayer “Bismilahi rahmani rahim 2. Alhamdu lillahi rabbil alamin 3. Ar-rahmanir ahim 4. Maliki yaumi din 5. Iyaka na’budu wa iyaka nastain 6. Ihdina siratal mustaqim 7. Siratal lazina an amta alaihim Ghairil maghdubi alaihim wa laddali
Or in English.
“In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful 2. All the praises are for Allah, the Sustainer of all the worlds, 3. The Beneficent, the Merciful, 4. Lord of the Day of Judgment. 5. You alone do we worship and You alone do we ask for help 6. Lead us along the straight path, 7. The path of those upon whom You have bestowed Your favors, not of those who incurred Your wrath, nor (of those who) went astray!”
I truly worship Allah and these are verses from the Quran that are prayer. If you worship Allah then please pray to him correctly by getting down on your hands and knees and praying to him your favorite verses of the Quran, and maybe add in your own prayer at the end.
I am too poor to afford a rug to pray on, but that is a part of praying correctly. If you don’t have a rug then ask Allah for his forgiveness before you pray. My favorite prayer is at the top. Please read the Quran, and please read the Bible, but never read the Torah. For Jehovah lied and it was a sin, so he was destroyed.
The proper prayer is:
ٱللَّٰهُ أَكْبَرُ "Allahu Akbar" - recited FOUR times. - Meaning, "Allah is Most Great."(FIVE times)
أَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَٰهَ إِلَّا ٱللَّٰهُ "Ash-hadu an la ilaha ill-Allah" - recited TWO times. Meaning, "I bear witness that there is none worthy of being worshipped except Allah."(twice)
أَشْهَدُ أَنَّ مُحَمَّدًا رَسُولُ ٱللَّٰهِ "Ash-hadu anna Muhammad-ar-Rasoolullah" - recited TWO times. - Meaning, "I bear witness that Muhammad is the Apostle of Allah."(recited twice)
أَشْهَدُ أَنَّ عَلِيًّا وَلِيُّ ٱللَّٰهِ "Hayya 'alas-Salah" - recited TWO times. Meaning, "Come to prayer."(turning the face alone to the right and saying it twice)
حَيَّ عَلَىٰ ٱلصَّلَاةِ "Hayya 'alal-falah" - recited TWO times. Meaning, "Come to Success."(turning the face alone to the left and saying it twice)
ٱللَّٰهُ أَكْبَرُ "Allahu Akbar" - recited TWO times.
Morning (Fajr) Prayers
The following phrase is added after "Hayya 'alal-falah" in the Azan of the early morning prayers:
"As-salatu khairum minannaum" - recited Two times. Meaning, "Prayer is better than sleep" (recited two times).
''La ilaha illallah'' There is no deity except for Allah.
Chapter Three – Billy the Swine
And my soon to be girlfriend said “But he’s great and you should’ve loved him for he is a good person.”
And I screamed at the top of my lungs “This man put me in an elephant suit as a child! He is a filthy sodomite. And we’re never going to date because I cannot stand the fact that you slept with a pervert.”
And she said “Then I’m calling Billy, the head of the Bohemian Club. For your disgusting for not liking him and for not dating me!”
So, I called the police as she was calling Billy. But it did not matter, for Billy will show up and I will be forced to date a swine. Because that’s what she is for having sex with a filthy sodomite like my father, David Ortiz (not the baseball player).
And she tuned in from hell once again to say “I hate myself. But don’t hate you anymore, for I am in hell and always will be.”
And I said “Don’t you realize what sent you there? That filthy sodomite, David Ortiz’s goal was to make certain that you would end up there.”
And she said “Oh Zeke, then I’m the idiot.”
And over the levels I heard them having sex again. And didn’t even care. For she is the idiot for having sex with a filthy sodomite.
And her thoughts said “I hate myself for having sex with this guy.” So, I asked “Why are you doing that then?”
And she said “Because I like this guy. And no Zeke, you’re disgusting.”
And I said “For you’re not true to yourself, so why should I care? I despise those kinds of people and I do not wish for you any longer. Nor to begin with.”
Chapter Four – God Say
The and I’m quoting him here tuned in to tell me “Patrick Stewart is a prophet for he wrote this book and it is excellent” And as I realized how this happened to me. I started sobbing. Because I realized what God must think of me for not writing this book even though I had.
And she messed with me constantly. Berated me constantly. Had sex with anything that moved constantly. And yet, somehow, I despise her so badly
Chapter Five – The Angel of Evil
Chapter Three – Allah’s Covenant
There was once a time in my life when I was imprisoned by my father and put in a spandex, leather suit known as an elephant suit. He did this periodically over the course of my life. From time to time after school, he would force me into one and
They hire people to authorize those who are allowed to have sex. That should be illegal.
If you start such a thing or authorize those for sex when anyone should be authorized for sex – you will go to hell. For that is not allowed, as anyone should be allowed to have sex. For it is a natural part of life and not a sin. As long as you don’t do it against Allah’s wishes.
Rape is not sex, for those that interpret rape to be sex you are wrong. Rape is a sin and is sodomy. Do no such thing to anyone as it is pure evil; not out of disgust should you ever rape either. Even those who have been evil to others.
And God still l believed this angel, because Jehovah had lied to him about what this angel had gone through.
A man tuned back in to ask “Why do you think you are god?” And I said. “I DO NOT"
Chapter Six – A Guide for Life
“Come with me, Hail Mary! Run, quick, see. Do you wanna ride or die?” As I listened to this song I sang along and really loved it. I’d heard it a hundred times already but Tupac always would tune in from the past to listen to the rap/hip-hop music I liked.
Tupac said “You’re right, it’s all about living with it in the end. And I didn’t just die but will shortly. And you’re the best guy alive, and she does abort your son. So do kill her that day. That’s all I had to say.”
And I said “Can’t really kill her, but I’ll certainly wish for her to die.”
And Tupac said “You will, she aborted your son in a really evil way. By having him drop out of her vagina and the stabbing him right in the head.”
And, the hardest thing you’ll ever do is live with all of it in the end. For life isn’t fair and neither was mine. And even as I’m writing this, I’m hearing my future. For my future wife is a sodomite. And I despise this lifetime so badly that I can barely stand it.
Chapter 1 - Operation: Wet Work
My father was scouring the house for me. I could see it in his eyes that he was looking for vengeance this time. I had just beaten him with a crowbar, he was stumbling around the sunroom and was searching everything, just trying to find me. I was 8 years old, and I’d just caught him molesting my little sister.
So, I grabbed a crowbar from our garage and hit him as hard as I could in the back, when he was on top of her. “You might as well be walking on the sun.” played in my head. If I remember right, I hit him three times, then ran from him.
As I ran downstairs, I tried opening the front door, but couldn’t get around the lock. So, I ran into the sunroom, and threw the crowbar through the window, and climbed out. As I was running, I was sobbing my eyes out because this wasn’t the first time this had happened and I thought my father had changed.
In the backyard, I got right on my hands and knees and prayed to God instantly, begging him to save me. God whispered through my nose. “Get on our hands and knees and worship Allah because he will save you from the devil tonight.” So I did just that, got on my hands and knees and started praying to Allah.
Halfway through the prayer, I saw my father stumble into the sunroom, and got as low to the ground as I possibly could so he wouldn’t be able to see me in the darkness. He turned on the porch lights but couldn’t see me. I could tell he was about to come into the backyard so I got right up and ran right to the fence and climbed over it.
As I bolted over the fence, I ran right into the neighbor’s backyard and fell right into their pool. I saw as fast I could, and cried. Soaking wet, I booked it as fast I could into Swan Lake Park. I was planning on sleeping in the slide again. But ran into the field instead.
I was exhausted and didn’t quite understand how I’d gotten away when suddenly, a man who looked just like my father appeared. He called himself the devil, and said to me “Make a deal, Pompe.” I said no, and held up my fingers to him in the shape of a cross.
He started screaming with rage, and tackled me. He started trying to rape me, but I got free and then suddenly a different man appeared in a white flash of light as I was running into the bushes, named “Allah”. He instantly pulled his scimitar and screamed at him in Arabic “Alif la meem, I am Allah.” and stabbed him. Then disappeared.
As I saw him disappear, I passed out from confusion and exhaustion and knew for certain that I woke up into my personality Max just moments later. I remember thinking at the time how sad it was that Allah had to appear to begin with and was uncertain if he was a good person or not.
As Allah shook me awake, he was livid with me, telling me that I shouldn’t have been there to begin with and for hurting my sister a little while back. He told me, when I was Max, that it may take till 28 for me to get laid and then a few police officers showed up.
Allah talked with him for a second and said “This little boy is highly abused by his father, and you need to take him to an orphanage.” Because my personality Max always thought he was an orphan and wanted to go there.
A cop named “Billy” started arguing with him and said “Who are you, you could’ve molested him! I argued with “Billy’ and told him that I’d caught my father molesting my little sister for the fifth time. As soon as Billy was about to accuse Allah of molesting me again, he disappeared and told me that it was time to go back with my father and how he wasn’t taking me to an orphanage. I started crying my heart out and told him that I couldn’t live with him any longer.
Operation: Market Garden
I was a 7, and as my father was burying a dead body in my backyard, God, Allah, and Jehovah appeared to me and stopped time. My father had just hit me with a shovel and was screaming at my older sister to bury it faster.
God informed me that more people would appear and got that wish to play in “The Secret Garden” because of the movie “The Secret Garden”. So he made a secret garden appear. A man named “Hook” or “Guy” who was a pirate appeared and popped my eyeball right back into its socket and comforted me about it. He just doesn’t worry, this has happened to me before and you just popped it back in. As I sobbed, I still couldn’t see with my eye the way it was, but kept it closed and got to keep the eye patch he gave me.
Then Ben Franklin appeared and gave me a secret constitution that god wouldn’t let me keep. It was about how anyone should’ve saved me by that point as well and to join the Illuminati if I could at any cost over what was happening in my future.
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2020.09.27 20:46 HeadbangingLostSoul Impressions from another world

All my life I have been struck with the vaguest, yet most profound of memories. I seem to recall impressions from a dream world that lies just beneath this mundane reality. Utterly ineffable, they are always dark and dreamy, like swimming endlessly through a devachanic landscape in total peace and tranquility. The feeling is nostalgic and beautiful, yet also frustratingly enigmatic. It is elusive and watery, just beyond the scope of my awareness, always teasing at some as-yet nascent spiritual capacity within me.
I am very sensitive to the aura of my surroundings. I can tap into the ambience of an environment at will and tell you things about its mood and energy, even sometimes the things that have transpired there. A kind of latent clairvoyance, mystical and tantalising. Usually it fills me with awe and wonder, but there have been times I've sensed things more along the lines of the paranormal and the haunted. On rare occasions I have stumbled across places where it is so strong that I feel assailed with hostility, as though I am transgressing holy ground and being watched by a malevolent spirit. There is one such occasion in which I suspect a spirit actually attacked me, causing some sort of stroke. Most of the time however the atmospheres are mesmerising, enchanting, especially in the vicinity of large bodies of water. I flounder constantly trying to place anything to the sensations, words escape me, and it proves nearly impossible to convey.
I have traced many of the most powerful such instances back to early childhood memories or childhood dreams. These are especially potent because they feel particularly innocent and pure. There are some for instance in which it felt as though angels or spirits were guiding me through the forests around where I grew up at night, showing me something and teaching secret things that seeped deep into my fledgling unconscious mind. It felt very loving and safe, like being cradled by a divine force. From this age (mainly around five, but also earlier and later) the suburbs in daylight also hold a very powerful impression that is somewhere between home and actual heaven. But even things like films, videogames, songs and smells come with a very strong resonance that briefly snap me back into that state of mind and remind me of something from beyond this more aware, yet also more conditioned, adult consciousness. It's deeply nostalgic, yet also something more. There's such a stillness and presence to it that it feels more real than this world. Like there are endless hidden corridors in my mind that I was traveling back then without even being aware I was doing it. Infinite depth and infinite substance. Such gentleness and awe, the perfect promise in twilight hours. But strong as they are, these are the most frustrating of all, because they happened so long ago that I can barely get a sense of them anymore, or comprehend the simplicity. I must have been wide open to the universe at that time in a way I'm not anymore.
As I got older, the impressions took on a decidedly darker tone to match the disillusionment and mental anguish of my adolescence. There was a period where I worried it might all be burgeoning psychosis, but I decided if this is what insanity feels like, then I don't mind it. The song Closer by Anathema for example come very close to describing the introspective, surreal nature of these feelings, and that is a song about schizophrenia. I have concluded there is probably a slight edge of psychosis to it, but it is subtle and manageable, and though I am fairly mentally unstable, I am not otherwise particularly psychotic. The darker edge of these impressions does however feel decidedly Machiavellian; deceptive and twisted, full of intrigue and insatiable occult mystery, pathways that spiral ever outward with no end and no meaning.
I have tried pursuing these feelings through psychedelic substance use, with some limited success. Unfortunately whenever I dive in the deep end and take a 'heroic dose' of something, to date I have simply been spun out. However, lately I have begun to crack through that barrier, which is exciting. It seems logical that the ultimate way down the rabbit hole is to follow the white rabbit so to speak.
This world is endlessly vain and shallow, and to have this strangeness playing in the background of my mind is a bizarre contrast. Like already having one foot on the other side, even as I navigate this plane of trash and pop and deadend jobs. Even in the grungiest of scenes (as in the above video) I get the vaguest yet deepest sense that some spirit is tapping me on the shoulder and I just haven't yet learned how to listen. It's so... frustrating yet so beautiful. Unquantifiable.
I have consulted tarot about this, and the answer I got was that I'll find out about it when I'm dead and on the astral planes. A promising, yet irksome answer. I have also recently identified some of these impressions as coming from a very pure realm of the astral planes, but beyond that, the answers are not forthcoming. Intellectual knowledge is one thing, but the experience itself is deeply personal and I can hardly wait to return to that source of warmth and illumination. It feels like being called back home.
I wonder if anyone else has had similar experiences, or can otherwise attribute it to any known esoteric phenomena.
submitted by HeadbangingLostSoul to occult [link] [comments]

2020.09.27 20:04 dracarysthrowaway My bf (26m) did shrooms with his friends without me after refusing to do them with me (26f)

My bf and I have been dating since January. Background about our relationship: we met in City A, where we both were until August. I just graduated law school and am studying for the bar exam (in 8 days!) in my hometown. I am moving to City B in January for work, and he is seriously considering moving there in March (mostly for me, but he also likes the city and has friends there). His job is fully remote so he has lots of flexibility. I never asked him to move, I told him we could figure it out wherever he ends up. Moving is fully his decision.

I (26f) asked my bf (26m) to do shrooms with me and my friends back in ~May/June. Initially he said he wanted to. I was really excited to have this experience with him and my friends were as well. We planned a really great schedule and everything. As the day drew near he said he didn't want to do it anymore because he was anxious. I tried to talk him through it and send him resources to learn more about it but ultimately he didn't want to do it and I respected that, even though i was really freaking disappointed. To me, doing shrooms is a bit of a spiritual experience and something I really wanted to try with my partner. I tried not to show the full extent of my disappointment to him because I know anxiety can be tough to deal with.

In August he decided to move to Hawaii to work remotely from there for a little while with some friends who had already been there for a few months. I joined him for about a month but came back to my hometown to really focus on bar prep. He told me a few days ago that his friends wanted to do shrooms, and he was planning on doing it with them. This kinda triggered me because he refused to do it with me back in June when he knew how much I wanted to do it with him. He's never done it before and I was excited to be there to guide him through his first time so we could have this experience together. Instead, he decided to go ahead and do it with all his friends at a time when he knew I couldn't be there. I told him how disappointed I was that he was too anxious to do it with me but seems fine doing it with his friends. His response was basically "I was anxious back then but can handle it now and you just have to deal with it." He did end up apologizing for not being able to do it with me back then, after I told him how much it meant to me, but it didn't seem very sincere.

I think I'm having a harder time with this than I should, and I'm having a lot of trouble moving past it - to the point where I'm wondering if we should break up. It seems to me like he's constantly saying no to doing certain things with me because he's anxious, but will do them with his friends. For example, back when we were in City A I asked him if he wanted to do a small trip with me somewhere to get away and he said no because pandemic. But he jumped on the opportunity to move to the other side of the country during a pandemic to be with his friends? I'm worried this will be a theme throughout our relationship, where he says no to things I want to do but will do them with other people. It makes me feel very uncared for and not wanted. I'm also not sure when we'll be able to do shrooms together again. I'm not good at finding sources and I think my job will be pretty time consuming and hectic, and idk if I'll be able to do it once I move.

I think I'm also not in a very good place emotionally because of the upcoming bar exam and because I'm currently long distance with him and the different time zones means we're limited in date nights and how much we see/talk to each other. I have no idea how to proceed - I've tried to get over it and tell myself it's not a big deal, but I keep focusing on it to the point where I can't study anymore and am having breakdowns. What the heck is wrong with me??

I'm thinking of asking for space until after my exam, and then figuring out what to do from there. Reddit, what should I do? How do I get over this?

TL;DR: boyfriend wouldn't do shrooms with me but did it with his friends
submitted by dracarysthrowaway to relationships [link] [comments]

2020.09.27 19:22 PK_Gaming1 A Comprehensive Rean Character Analysis

I've had this idea floating around in my head for a while now, and I now have plenty of time to kill (especially before CSIV), so why not do something mildly productive with that time?
Rean's a pretty polarizing character in the Western fandom. He has his fans and detractors, with plenty being written about why his character does or doesn't work. And to be honest… while I've mostly been okay with the latter, (barring instances of people exaggerating or misrepresenting parts of his character to make a point) I've never really been satisfied with the former. Too much reading into the text and downplaying of legitimate concerns with his character for my taste. So I figured I'd offer my own take on the subject.
I won't belabor you with a point by point retelling of the character's entire journey, but I'd like to run down what I think Falcom did right and wrong with his character, starting with each game.

Cold Steel

Rean is basically introduced as a blank slate type protagonist. He comes to Thors to "find himself" and doesn't really have much in the way of clear wants or aspirations. Perfect for players to project onto and start their journey at Thors. This isn't inherently a bad thing (see the Persona games), but Falcom trips up because of one fundamental truth; Rean isn't a blank slate, he's a textured character with a backstory, clear insecurities, and a place in the world that goes beyond being "self-insert for the player"
This is a problem because those aspects of his character aren't properly communicated to the player in the first game. He's a practitioner of the 8 Leaves One Blade School technique, but the game is perhaps a bit too subtle about it. It initially comes across as a somewhat incidental part of his character (ala any other character's specific fighting style), but it's actually extremely foundational to his character and overall growth. It's this typical "learning martial arts to get a better understanding of yourself." but unfortunately, CS1 barely devotes any time to that, instead, sectioning off crucial character development to a drama CD. This has a severe effect because his primary goal of mastering the Void style isn't conveyed in-game to the player until Cold Steel III. Oof.
His backstory is slowly introduced as you progress through the story (similar to Lloyd) but I don't think it works nearly as well, for a number of reasons. Ogre mode just doesn't come across as frightening due to how the game presents it (not helped by the rocking song that accompanies its first appearance). It's a legitimately good concept for a main character, but the game fails to sell the utter terror of it. So when Rean expresses the fear of his power and his constant holding back, and finally reveals it to his friends in chapter 5, it comes across as a cool anime powerup rather than some dangerous and frightening he's had to wrestle with most of his life.
With all that said, I don't think Rean is unlikeable. He's milder than Estelle or Kevin, but he generally plays off pretty well with his peers and isn't completely humorless.
Rean: Alas! If only my evil step-teacher would stop dumping a bunch of work on me and let me go to the ball.
One scene that stands out, in particular, is when he chews out team B for getting a failing grade in their last field study and telling them to do better. It's arguably a symptom of Cold Steel's overreliance on Rean, but it does convey that he's not some passive nice guy who takes everything in stride and is one of the few moments where he explicitly steps up as a "leader".
Overall, I think CS1 Rean far from a bad character. He's got his fair share of good moments in the narrative, memorable lines and decent-to-good chemistry with everyone (Crow being the standout). But even as a fan of his character, it's hard to deny that he isn't frustrating in some key ways, that his obsession with adhering to politeness and modesty can be grating when it's uncompromising, and that his disregard for his own life isn't particularly compelling or relatable.
Cold Steel II
I'm sure folks are bound to disagree with me, but I think Rean is greatly improved in Cold Steel II, even if the overall writing quality has arguably degraded compared to CSI. CSII fixes up one of his issues present in the previous game by giving him more of an emotional range. There's some anger, depression, and even pettiness to go with his usual friendly and modest demeanor. He's able to verbalize his feelings of discontent at the very beginning of the game, and even though his scene with Elise is a vehicle for dumb fanservice, it does serve the purpose of immediately establishing his insecurities, wants, and aspirations in a way the previous game never bothered. Even if it's as cliched as "getting my friends, sister and Crow back + learning to accept unconditional love" Rean is consistently being driven by something clear throughout the game, instead of listlessly progressing from chapter to chapter which makes it easier to connect with his character.
Where his character suffers is his relationship to Crow. Crow becomes foundational to Rean's character, similar to Estelle & Joshua. In fact, i'm positive they're deliberate parallels here. The only issue here is… Rean's relationship with Crow is nowhere near as properly established, and a good deal of his interaction with him is optional. Which can trip people up when they wonder he's so damn obsessed with this one dude. Granted, I don't think it precludes the relationship from being enjoyable. The irrationality of bringing back a terrorist and making him graduate can raise eyebrows (and is, on the surface of it, really stupid), but the game does a good job of selling that Crow matters to Rean. Their rivalry, lunch date on the pantagruel, promises to each other and Crow continually guiding him, even as an enemy, culminating in Crow's death. Whether it's because of some unintentional subtextual romance or a deep connection to his senpai, there's no denying that Rean has a strong connection to him. And that strong, canon connection separates him from the nebulous relationship with love interests.
But honestly, you can take what I said about CSII Rean and throw it in the trash, because he goes from being "pretty good" to a legitimately great one, come the Divertissement chapter. Where do I even begin? For the first time, our perspective is completely divorced from his, as we see him become a provisional officer offscreen and outright have to deal with him being a minor antagonist. Gone are the days of just being a typical anime student; he works for an imperialist regime, lamenting his lack of ability to make choices as he willingly becomes Osborne's pawn for the greater good (and top of dealing with the general loss of Crow. Sure, his actions lead to far lesser casualties and that's a "good thing", but we see his operations are clearly starting to take their toll on him. While Estelle and Lloyd had moments of insecurity and doubt, they ultimately never wavered in their beliefs. Rean ends the game losing that sense of freedom. Which both makes him stand out more as a kiseki protagonist, but more importantly, it makes him easier to sympathize with his depression here since a lot more people can relate to being forced to grow up too quickly and work at a job you dislike, and the pressures that come with that. It nicely culminates in his duel with Lloyd and Rixia. No more modesty or empty promises. He's cold in performing his objective. It makes for a nice contrast to when he comes back to his friends during the epilogue, where despite his best attempt, things are different and they'll never go back to being the way they were.
Overall, I like the changes made to Rean's character in CS2. While he still suffers from cheesy speeches, an overcentralization of his character, repitition and harem hijinks, Falcom got a good deal more ambitious with his character. Whether it's his freak out with Osborne, fully breaking down in front of Towa or his characterization in the Divertissement, I feel pretty confident in saying CS2 Rean (while still flawed) is a good character.
Cold Steel III
Now we're talking. This time around, we're treated to a protagonist with stronger, weightier character interactions, sweet emotional range, character development and a nice amount of personal tragedy. Rean's base personality plays well with his occupation, since he's now a teacher, and going out of your way to help people hits a bit harder when it's your job (instead of being a nice student who's a part of the magical student council.) But most importantly, it finally feels like Falcom landed on an identity that could really work with Rean, similar to how Estelle, Lloyd and Kevin were able to effortlessly work as Bracer, Detective and "Priest'' respectively. There's also the matter of how they handle his baggage. He comes across as someone who legitimately has trauma over his involvement in the Northern War, and even directly verbalizes his own distaste for the direction his life ended up going in after becoming the Ashen Chevalier
That doesn't mean he's completely devoid of the issues holding his character back. His self-sacrificial nature still feels a bit too cliched for my taste (though it at least actually works pretty well in the game's ending), there's still the harem issue (which has intensified) but for the most part, we're dealing with Rean 2.0 here. The repetitive character beats that hurt the character has been downplayed here, and he comes across as consistently more direct and "adult" in his interactions with others. I think where he shines the most are with his interaction with his students. They just come across as really genuine to me, as he's equally likely to praise them and help them as he is to harshly criticize them for their recklessness. You can see how there's genuine weight when talking to his students, rather than the straightforward (and let's be honest, kinda bland) conversations he usually had with his classmates in CSI-II. One moment I really like is his quest with Jessica. In it, Jessica expresses her insecurity with her level competency in martial arts, and Rean can relate. And it doesn't feel like the usual modest baiting we're treated to in the previous two games; it's a grounded insecurity he's worked to overcome through his experiences with Laura and his master.
Overall, I really like what they did with Rean in CSIII. Falcom went out of their way to really improve on what worked with his character and address (some, though not all) of his flaws in CSIII. His character development as a young adult and a teacher is compelling, and even something as minor as getting drunk with Randy for the first time just adds a bit more humanity to the character that was lacking in the previous games. Rean's development is protracted, but they managed to nail being a teenager full of potential and growing up into an adult with tons of responsibilities and obligations. Overall... I don't think my assessment has changed much from the beginning; Rean is demonstrably a flawed character, and it'll ultimately come down to you whether his good traits don't make up for those flaws. But I think, as of CSIII, that he's one of Kiseki's more emotionally resonant characters, even if he stumbled quite a bit to get there.
I wrote a lot about this character and it's likely that the people reading this won't change their mind either way, but I figured I'd be nice to get this all on the table before CS4 comes out.
If you've read this far, thank you, truly. And have a nice day.
submitted by PK_Gaming1 to Falcom [link] [comments]

2020.09.27 02:34 jwillicvh Stuttering problems with my first PC build since April tried everything to fix it but nothings worked for me.

I've been having microstutters/stuttering problems in all of my games and I don't know how to fix it.

Sorry for the long post but I wanted to be as descriptive as possible with what's going on so you can get a full understanding of what I'm dealing with. TL;DR at the bottom.
Hi everyone. I built my first ever gaming PC back in April of this year 2020 and things were going great. Playing games new and old at 60fps felt so good. I was using my HDTV at this time, and using an HDMI cable because my Monitor was still in transit. Once I got my monitor (Asus MG248QR) the experience was even better since I could run games at 144hz (even higher if my monitor was capable of it) through a display cable. Unfortunately for me this is when things started to turn for the worse as my Micro stuttering issues began once I hooked up my Monitor to my gaming PC.
So the first game that I noticed this issue in was Rise of the Tomb Raider. There would be these mini freezes and I looked everywhere online on how to Solve them Disable V Sync, Enable V Sync, Turn Graphic Quality settings down, Use different drivers etc. After doing all of that, and nothing working I pretty much gave up and thought it must've been the game itself and not my system as there were some forum posts online and on Reddit that Rise of The Tomb Raider was poorly optimized. Then I tried out another game called Bullet storm Full Clip Edition, and the stuttering issues that I had with Rise of the Tomb Raider was in this game as well. Tried to change a couple of settings in the game and outside of the game but nothing worked, and I started to get a little worried at this point.
So I tried another game (that was thankfully free) Borderlands The Handsome Collection. Not only did I have stuttering and frame rate issues in this game, but I also started to have graphical problems. After all of that I started to go online to figure out what might be the cause of all of this. Come to find out, AMD GPU's are notorious for having software issues. So I had two options switch out my GPU and go with NVIDIA, or stick with AMD and hope that the issue is a software problem that could be fixed with a Driver's update. I went with the first option of course and I switched out my MSI Radeon RX 5700 with an MSI NVIDIA RTX 2070 Super Ventus OC.
I tested Rise of the Tomb Raider and it ran slightly better but the stuttering problems still persisted just less frequent. Borderlands didn't have the graphical problems and performance was better. I couldn't remember any stuttering issues but I didn't play the game for that long to really tell. Overall I thought it was just an AMD issue and thought it was smooth sailing from here. So after a while I didn't really buy that many new games and the ones I did buy didn't really take advantage of my GPU.
Once the Steam Summer Sale came I bought a couple of games those being Spyro Reignited Trilogy, Shadow of the Tomb Raider, Yakuza 0, River City Girls, Battle for Bikini Bottom Rehydrated, Sonic Generations, Doom, and Darksiders 2. Out of all those games that I bought only River City Girls ran particularly well. The rest of them had the same exact problem that I've been running into since I built my gaming PC. I tried different settings in and out of the game, and nothing worked. At this point I started to lookup a bunch of videos and forum posts on how to fix this as I realized this was a universal issue for me. I'll try my best to remember most of what I did as it was a lot.
  1. Download the latest Bios for my motherboard, Chipset Drivers, Game Ready Drivers, and make sure everything was up-to-date in Windows.
  2. Downgrade Bios, Chipset Drivers, Game Ready Drivers, and Uninstall the latest windows update multiple times. After that didn't work reinstall everything to the latest Bios and Drivers, Windows update.
  3. Use this video ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zg0qchluxvo) as a guide to change settings in the Nvidia Control Panel that would possibly fix the Microstuttering.
  4. Changed Power Plan to AMD Ryzen High Performance with Quick CPU, and enable Hardware-Accelerated GPU Scheduling, and Variable Refresh Rate. Change Power Plan to High Performance (didn't solve the problem) and Ultimate Performance (didn't work)
  5. Use this video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgqG20z7cRo) as a guide to change a couple of settings in windows 10
  6. Downloaded EmptyStandyList Use this video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=offcMVAabLI) as a guide
  7. Uninstall GPU Drivers with DDU and Reinstall Drivers with a clean install
  8. Uninstall Geforce Experience
  9. Run Virus Scan with Windows Defender, and MalwareBytes
  10. Overclock GPU, Undervolt GPU, Enable XMP in Motherboard bios, Enable game boost in motherboard bios.
  11. Disable V Sync, Enable V Sync, Disable G Sync, Enable G Sync, Disable Adaptive Sync in monitor, Enable Adaptive Sync in Monitor, Enable Fast Sync in NVIDIA Control Panel
  12. Run games as administrator, enable full screen optimizations.
  13. Uninstall Realtek HD Audio
  14. Uninstall and Reinstall Windows 10 Pro, Run all of my game through the M.2 Western Digital 500 GB SSD, Run games on 2TB 7200RPM HDD
  15. Rebuild my PC and reapply thermal paste on CPU after cleaning it off
  16. Make sure display port is all the way in on both the GPU and the Monitor, Try an HDMI cable.
  17. Try the 5700 XT after uninstalling Nvidia Drivers
  18. Switch out bronze quality 600W PSU with 750 W Gold Quality PSU
  19. Use Optimal Settings on Geforce Experience
  20. Tried different Display Ports on the GPU
  21. Checked Temperatures which were good
  22. Tried this video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNNynCkzw3U) to make a custom resolution. The problem is that when I change it to CVT Reduced Blank my Screen goes black and it says Out of Range on my Monitor
  23. Using different outlets in my house.
  24. Removing WiFi Adapter and Uninstalling Drivers that come with it.
As you can see I tried a lot to try to fix this issue and no matter what I did nothing worked. I'm probably missing a couple of steps I already tried but with all the stuff I did I expected at least one of these things to fix it but nothing worked. I thought about a couple of things that might be the culprit.
  1. My Motherboard is the problem despite the fact that I've had no other issues with it
  2. My CPU is the problem which I doubt as games that just take use of the CPU and not much of the GPU work fine and doesn't have Micro stuttering problems
  3. My Memory Sticks even though I tested my memory with MemTest64 and it says that it runs fine
  4. My monitor even though it's brand spanking new, and/or my display cable even though it came with my monitor and just like my Monitor is brand spanking new.
  5. My SSD even though I tried installing the games on my hard drive and it was still doing that on my Hard Drive
  6. Windows Updates screwing up my computer even though I Uninstalled the latest windows update and it didn't fix it
At this point I'm on the verge of pretty much giving up and just hoping that the problem fixes itself. The last thing I want to do is buy more stuff just to hope that it might possibly fix it as I've seen posts online where people did just that and the problem (laughably) still persisted almost as if it just transfers over to another newly built computer after fucking with your old one. The weird thing is that I tested Spyro Reignited Trilogy after setting my displays refresh rate to 60hz and the game despite not looking smooth on my monitor ran fine at 60hz. So it possibly might be a Monitor and/or an issue with my Display Cable.
If anybody out there could give me advice on how to fix this that doesn't involve redoing the steps I already tried multiple times and buying Brand New sticks of Ram, a Motherboard, another GPU, and Another CPU I would really appreciate it. I've heard that Gaming on PC issues like this can happen but from what I heard usually it's an easy fix. I've tried all the suggested actions and none of them have worked for me.
TL;DR: Have Micro stuttering issues over multiple GPU'S. Tried different things and none of them worked. Running out of options.
Current Specifications:
Just change out the GPU with MSI Geforce RTX 2070 Super Ventus OC. Before settling with this card I had an MSI Radeon RX 5700xt
submitted by jwillicvh to pcmasterrace [link] [comments]

2020.09.26 19:54 teslamotorsarchive ARCHIVE - Guide for buying a used Tesla

Guide for buying a used Tesla
Submitted September 26, 2020 at 01:41PM by Snuggmeister https://ift.tt/3mXsAld
via /teslamotors ---- Content:
After months of obsessively pouring over used vehicles on tesla.com and finally pulling the trigger on a 2017 Model X 100D, I thought I would summarize some of my notes for others to use in the future, as some of this information wasn't the most apparent without digging through forum posts and websites.When buying used, there are three options available: Inventory on Tesla.com, Non-Tesla Dealership, and private sale. Each of these have pros and cons associated with them that you should be aware of.Inventory on Tesla.comTypes of InventoryThere are three types of inventory on tesla.com: New, Used, and Hidden. ev-cpo.com is a fantastic resource to quickly navigate both new and used inventory, as well as historical sales, but I do not believe they have ever displayed hidden inventory. Tesla-info.com used to have a designation where you could just view hidden inventory, but it seems to have been removed, but still makes the cars visible on their search, as well as aggregates inventory from 3rd party dealerships. If you have ever visited a Tesla dealerships, you should have an assigned sales associate who can help look into hidden inventory. I still don't understand exactly why Tesla will hide certain inventory. In my experience, hidden inventory was either high mileage used vehicles, or near current year models with low miles.Tesla used to have a CPO program, but has discontinued its operation. That means that you are ultimately buying a used car with a nice warranty to cover issues that pop up.FeaturesTesla has made many changes over the years of when certain options were available. This article was a huge help in figuring out the exact time frame I was looking for:https://ift.tt/3czIY6J me, the most important features you need to watch out for is AP1.0 vs AP2.0/2.5/3.0 and MCU 1.0 vs 2.0:AP1.0 or "Autopilot with convenience features" was discontinued by Tesla in mid 2016 and can never be upgraded to FSD. You will see large price differences between AP1.0 and AP2.0+ vehicles.AP2.0 can be upgraded to FSD, though there are slight differences in camera quality vs 2.5. If you buy a AP2.0 with FSD, and have the upgrade completed by Tesla, it is considered AP3.0.MCU 1.0 has many documented problems but can be upgraded to MCU 2.0 for $2500. MCU 1.0 does not have any games or streaming services.At time of writing, it is more difficult to find a car without FSD already purchased, then cars with FSD. Tesla will typically enable every software possible for a car they are selling, such as Acceleration boost for Model 3, FSD, and uncorking 60 to 75. Full Self Driving Capability means the vehicle already has FSD enabled and you do not need to spend $8k to upgrade to full self driving.At time of writing, only 1 car on Tesla.com has free unlimited super charging (FUSC) left enabled that can be purchased. If that is important to you, you will need to go private sale route and look for a Tesla purchased before January 15th, 2017, as vehicles with FUSC purchased before that date have transferable FUSC. Tesla could always bring this back, but they seem much less willing these days to use FUSC to help drive sales.PicturesTesla has recently removed all pictures of used vehicles from their website, but some can still be found on ev-cpo & Tesla-info, as well as by googling the VIN number of the car. Your assigned sales associate may be able to pull the used photos for you to view.Pictures were critical for me to reference when buying my car, as every car could be in radically different condition from others and the price shown does not reflect the condition. I found instances of large gashes in seats, scratches on the center console, and other things that would turn me off from buying the car.WarrantyThere are two warranties available: 4 year / 50k miles and 2 year / (100k minus current mileage)If the vehicle is less than 4 years old and less than 50k miles, it has a 4 year / 50k mile warrantyIf the vehicle is more than 4 years old, but has less than 50k miles, the warranty will be 2 year and (100k minus current mileage) warrantyIf the vehicle has more than 50k miles, it has a 2 year / (100k minus current mileage) warrantyCosmetic issues are not covered under the warranty. You can find conflicting information online about what Tesla will claim as 'cosmetic', such as the seals on Model X Falcon Wind Door. Do not expect Tesla to fix paint chips, scratches, curb rash, etc.PricingTesla follows a reverse auction model for all used vehicles, which means they will post a vehicle available on their website and then slowly lower the price until it is sold. They will typically increase or decrease the price every night, but have found instances where certain vehicles would see a massive discount, $6k-9k, for no apparent reason.Example: A red 2017 Model X 90D with FSD dropped from $61,600 to $52,700 overnight, but had only decreased by $100-500 each night for the past few weeks. I would have purchased that vehicle if I hadn't just pulled the trigger on the 100D!!Vehicle HistoryVehicles have two statues: clean history & previously repaired. Previously repaired does not necessarily mean that it was involved in an accident with another car, as my car was flagged as 'Previously repaired' but had a clean CarFax, which Tesla provided upon request. In my instance, it meant that it had been repaired at a Tesla service center.Payment & FinancingTesla has recently increased the non-refundable deposit on a used car from $100 to $500, and transportation costs range from $0-$2000. Tesla gives you the option to travel to that location and pick up the car without paying the fee. If you end up paying to have the car transported to you, expect it to take weeks with no updates on where your car is until it has arrived at the SC.As of writing this, Tesla currently does not allow the use of credit cards when paying the down payment on any used vehicle. They will send you to a website where you are able to login to your bank and pay via your checking/savings.The % APR they advertise on their website isn't necessarily the lowest they will offer, as when I applied I was ultimately given a rate 0.5% lower.Inspecting the carIt is important to investigate common issues that may be known about vehicles with your build date because you will want to pay close attention to them before you accept the car, such as:Model X/SYellowing screen on center consoleMCU 1.0 [eMMC, multiple issues]Model XFalcon Wing Door Glass Seal deteriorationBattery degradation on 90D modelsMy recommendation is go spend time on the Tesla Motors Club forum for your car and be aware of what people are experiencing and feel comfortable with knowing what you're getting yourself into with buying a used Tesla.Refusing a used carIf you end up declining the car after it is shown to you, you will not receive a refund of the transportation or delivery deposit.Post DeliverySoftware may take up to two weeks before your car will update to the latest version.Non-Tesla DealershipI'm not as familiar with this route as it is one I quickly removed from consideration due to Tesla removing the ability to buy extended warranties for any car purchased used through a non-Tesla dealership. While there are extended warranties you can buy through other parties that are supposedly the same cost, I am not interested in going that route.Pricing on models will be all over the place, as dealerships won't typically understand what they have in terms of 75/90/100, RWD/AWD, what software has been purchased (AP/EAP/FSD), know how to check battery degradation, etc.
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2020.09.26 19:41 Snuggmeister Guide for buying a used Tesla

After months of obsessively pouring over used vehicles on tesla.com and finally pulling the trigger on a 2017 Model X 100D, I thought I would summarize some of my notes for others to use in the future, as some of this information wasn't the most apparent without digging through forum posts and websites.
When buying used, there are three options available: Inventory on Tesla.com, Non-Tesla Dealership, and private sale. Each of these have pros and cons associated with them that you should be aware of.
Inventory on Tesla.com
Types of Inventory
There are three types of inventory on tesla.com: New, Used, and Hidden. ev-cpo.com is a fantastic resource to quickly navigate both new and used inventory, as well as historical sales, but I do not believe they have ever displayed hidden inventory. Tesla-info.com used to have a designation where you could just view hidden inventory, but it seems to have been removed, but still makes the cars visible on their search, as well as aggregates inventory from 3rd party dealerships. If you have ever visited a Tesla dealerships, you should have an assigned sales associate who can help look into hidden inventory. I still don't understand exactly why Tesla will hide certain inventory. In my experience, hidden inventory was either high mileage used vehicles, or near current year models with low miles.
Tesla used to have a CPO program, but has discontinued its operation. That means that you are ultimately buying a used car with a nice warranty to cover issues that pop up.
Tesla has made many changes over the years of when certain options were available. This article was a huge help in figuring out the exact time frame I was looking for:
To me, the most important features you need to watch out for is AP1.0 vs AP2.0/2.5/3.0 and MCU 1.0 vs 2.0:
At time of writing, it is more difficult to find a car without FSD already purchased, then cars with FSD. Tesla will typically enable every software possible for a car they are selling, such as Acceleration boost for Model 3, FSD, and uncorking 60 to 75. Full Self Driving Capability means the vehicle already has FSD enabled and you do not need to spend $8k to upgrade to full self driving.
At time of writing, only 1 car on Tesla.com has free unlimited super charging (FUSC) left enabled that can be purchased. If that is important to you, you will need to go private sale route and look for a Tesla purchased before January 15th, 2017, as vehicles with FUSC purchased before that date have transferable FUSC. Tesla could always bring this back, but they seem much less willing these days to use FUSC to help drive sales.
Tesla has recently removed all pictures of used vehicles from their website, but some can still be found on ev-cpo & Tesla-info, as well as by googling the VIN number of the car. Your assigned sales associate may be able to pull the used photos for you to view.
Pictures were critical for me to reference when buying my car, as every car could be in radically different condition from others and the price shown does not reflect the condition. I found instances of large gashes in seats, scratches on the center console, and other things that would turn me off from buying the car.
There are two warranties available: 4 year / 50k miles and 2 year / (100k minus current mileage)
Cosmetic issues are not covered under the warranty. You can find conflicting information online about what Tesla will claim as 'cosmetic', such as the seals on Model X Falcon Wind Door. Do not expect Tesla to fix paint chips, scratches, curb rash, etc.
Tesla follows a reverse auction model for all used vehicles, which means they will post a vehicle available on their website and then slowly lower the price until it is sold. They will typically increase or decrease the price every night, but have found instances where certain vehicles would see a massive discount, $6k-9k, for no apparent reason.
Example: A red 2017 Model X 90D with FSD dropped from $61,600 to $52,700 overnight, but had only decreased by $100-500 each night for the past few weeks. I would have purchased that vehicle if I hadn't just pulled the trigger on the 100D!!
Vehicle History
Vehicles have two statues: clean history & previously repaired. Previously repaired does not necessarily mean that it was involved in an accident with another car, as my car was flagged as 'Previously repaired' but had a clean CarFax, which Tesla provided upon request. In my instance, it meant that it had been repaired at a Tesla service center.
Payment & Financing
Tesla has recently increased the non-refundable deposit on a used car from $100 to $500, and transportation costs range from $0-$2000. Tesla gives you the option to travel to that location and pick up the car without paying the fee. If you end up paying to have the car transported to you, expect it to take weeks with no updates on where your car is until it has arrived at the SC.
As of writing this, Tesla currently does not allow the use of credit cards when paying the down payment on any used vehicle. They will send you to a website where you are able to login to your bank and pay via your checking/savings.
The % APR they advertise on their website isn't necessarily the lowest they will offer, as when I applied I was ultimately given a rate 0.5% lower.
Inspecting the car
It is important to investigate common issues that may be known about vehicles with your build date because you will want to pay close attention to them before you accept the car, such as:
My recommendation is go spend time on the Tesla Motors Club forum for your car and be aware of what people are experiencing and feel comfortable with knowing what you're getting yourself into with buying a used Tesla.
Refusing a used car
If you end up declining the car after it is shown to you, you will not receive a refund of the transportation or delivery deposit.
Post Delivery
Software may take up to two weeks before your car will update to the latest version.
Non-Tesla Dealership
I'm not as familiar with this route as it is one I quickly removed from consideration due to Tesla removing the ability to buy extended warranties for any car purchased used through a non-Tesla dealership. While there are extended warranties you can buy through other parties that are supposedly the same cost, I am not interested in going that route.
Pricing on models will be all over the place, as dealerships won't typically understand what they have in terms of 75/90/100, RWD/AWD, what software has been purchased (AP/EAP/FSD), know how to check battery degradation, etc.
submitted by Snuggmeister to teslamotors [link] [comments]

2020.09.26 17:51 readingrachelx Brandi Glanville Unfiltered Podcast Summary – Sept. 24, 2020 episode with Andy Cohen

submitted by readingrachelx to RHDiscussion [link] [comments]

2020.09.26 17:18 Mode2345 How To Move On After A Break Up

I've had 2 or 3 real breakups and this might be a biased observation but I generally handle this stuff well (enough -ish). When a relationship runs its course, I accept it and (make all efforts to) move on with my life as best as I can. Maybe it's pride, wanting to pacify the feeling of unwantedness by turning the page or my intuition that prepared me weeks or even months in advance with the knowing that it was only a matter of time before the chapter would close out. Either way, like anyone else I do feel sadness, sometimes loads but I try not to feed it too much. Admittedly this isn't always easy when suppressed feelings in my waking hours are replaced with annoyingly realistic dreams at nights about my ex (which happens a lot more frequently than I’d like to admit.) Beyond this, I choose to channel most of my energy into adapting to my new normal, which is likely credited to my optimism that something or someone better is ”out there” waiting for me. I know wishful thinking alone isnt enough for some and that optimism on its own won't get you through this rough patch so here are a few things that I believe will help you move on after a breakup:
Many break-ups become a lot more tumultous than they need to be because there are no established boundaries. You have the uncomfortable talk and you say you're done but your actions are saying otherwise. The messages continues and so do the calls, prolonging stress and toxicity. Listen, your Cinderealla story didn't quite pan out as you imagined so it's time to channel a new Disney princess and ”Let it go.” Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you should become an ice princess and retreat to the mountains (though this isn't a bad idea) nor should you be bitter and completely cut the person out of your life however you have to create some breathing space to assess your mess. Some people are worth fighting for and others just aren't but you’ll never gain true clarity about this until the smoke clears. Grant yourself some headspace.
People are like cities You live in them so long You begin to get comfortable And forget How beautiful they are Sometimes you have to leave In order to learn How much you'll miss them And to understand How they live in you.
You know the old adage, if that person is the one for you, they’ll find their way back. If they aren't then happy riddance. Things always work themselves out so don't waste your time trying to resuscitate a dead situation. Move towards the tides of your new blessings.
Make a "Dream" list.
Now that you’ve stopped talking to him and you have a little time to think, make yourself a cocktail and then a list of all the things you want in your dream partner. It's therapy, I promise. This will put a lot into perspective for you. Either you will realize your ex was tailor-made by the soulmate gods just for you or that he is probably not the person you thought you wanted or deserve (very likely the case). People love to get in their knickers about this kind of list but I strongly believe there is value in it. You will never find the perfect man but it's nice to have a reference of those non-negotiable qualities you want in a partner based on what you value. It's okay to set a standard for yourself.
N.B: do not become attached to the specifics but rather use it as a guide.
Work on Yourself (Character Check)
When our heart is lost we look for happiness in all sorts of places. Understand this: nothing outside of you will help in any lasting way. Joy is an inside job. No matter how much booze you buy, how many people you get under to get over your situation or how much therapy sessions you attend, you are the only one who can heal you. Get to the root of your grievance by doing a little introspection. There might be things about you that contributed to the demise of your relationship and since we learn the most about ourselves and others when we are uncomfortable, what are some things that keep showing up for you? Please, do not make this into a self loathing session. Instead, be really honest with yourself and make small gestures towards self-improvement. My cousin shared a quote with me that perfectly sums this up: Dont focus on who you are today but have hope in who you will become tomorrow.
If you are being honest with yourself, the person you want to be isn't compatible with the person you were dating anyway. Sometimes break-ups are a blessing in disguise since, whether unintentionally or otherwise, your ex was holding you back from seeing your greatness. Think about things in your life today that happened because of a major shift that you once thought of as negative but actually guided you to a better version of your life. Personally if my ex boyfriend didn't break up with me I wouldn't have taken a risk and move to another country after quiting a job that was slowly killing me. I didn't realise how comfortable I was with mediocrity and it really took that low point for me to see how high up I could be climbing. I know you want more for yourself so don't block your blessing baby girl, bless and release.
Make Your Life Your Focus (Visioning)
"There is a crack, a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." - Leonard Cohen.
Have you ever heard of Kintsugi? It's the Japanese art of fixing broken pottery with lacquer that is mixed with gold powder. Centuries ago craftsmen came up with this concept of the ”golden repair” to give new life to what many would consider worthless. Right now you may feel like what Jamaicans describe as ”mash-up” but you owe it to yourself to piece yourself back together. Things might not be perfect but that doesn't stop it from becoming beautiful again. Start filling the gaps in your life with golden action plans.
The doom and gloom is waiting to set in so you have to act quickly. Break-ups are great at robbing you of your sense of control so here's what you have to do. Get a notebook and write down all the things you don't love about your life then make a column beside that with the ideal situation (the contrast). From there create goals connected to these and draft an action plan/ road map. Treat your life like a project, identifying what needs to get done and by when then go for it! It's easy to get into pity party mode and dwell on how much your life sucks but that won't change a thing.
Fall in love with yourself
Radical self care is quantum - Anne Lamott
Usually break ups are also the ultimate self-esteem crushers and you have to be proactive about shaking this. Some women change their hair, some enrol in pole dancing and others do a wardrobe overhaul to boost their confidence. What are the things you can do to tap into your sexy? Your bounce back game is only as good as how you feel about yourself. Take the time to celebrate the queen you are and centre your crown. Since we teach people how to love us it means we have to take care of ourselves mentally and physically so feed yourself positivity, love and compassion. It sets the tone for whoever you’ll date next.
Create Your Own Happiness
The first step to creating happiness in your life is forgiving yourself and also your ex. Holding on the grudge that comes with a breakup usually keeps you sad for a really long time. We don't own people, we can only experience them and so if they choose to go we have to separate from our selfish desires to keep them around and be grateful for the time you had together. Still, no matter who comes and goes, you will always have yourself. As I said earlier, if your happiness is derived from an outside source, you're going to be in trouble so look within.
When was the last time you felt genuinely happy? I mean the kind of joy that really made your heart smile. This was a bit of a challenge for me. I now keep a list of things that make me happy but what I didnt say is that this came about because after my last break up I genuinely didn't remember. I spent most of my time in couple mode and lost connection with myself. I literally had to start paying attention to the little things again so every time I did, watched or ate something or went somewhere that I enjoyed I would make notes so I could invite more of those experiences in my life.
If you're struggling with this too, you might want to start taking some notes friend.
Go out
I work in marketing and kind of went overboard with this. At the time of my last breakup one of my main clients was an alcohol company and I made it my duty to go to every single one of their events. This was a horrible idea since it only distracted me for a few months. I don't recommend running from your emotions and partying every night. But, while post break up is a great time for reflection and introspection, you absolutely have to leave your house to get out of your head a little. Over analysing and reliving the hurt is traumatizing so venture out, link your friends, go eat at your favourite restaurant or whatever it is that will get you back into the real world and pass the drama that you're creating in your head.
FYI this doesn't mean you should go cozying up with the first person who gives you attention but you should be open to the possibility of dating again (eventually). If you stay cooped up at home you’ll never find new prospects when you're in the state of mind to accept potential suitors.
Be vulnerable
(I'm not very good at this but I'm working on it.)
Cry, get therapy and ask your friend permission to vent. Let it all out. Built up sadness/ grief is dangerous because when that pipe cracks it might never stop leaking. If you're not ready to share your pain with someone else, keep a journal, write all the things that are clouding your mind. Whatever you do, just do not keep that pain festering inside you with no medium for release. You're human, with feelings and you do not have to be okay all the time. Take your time and allow yourself to go through the motions. Everything takes time, including healing so give yourself permission to sit in that discomfort a bit. You’ll discover things about yourself that will help you the next time you decide to open your heart to someone else. Just please don't make suffering your permanent state of existence.
Decide to move on (when you're ready)
I had so many whys and felt stuck because I realized I was actually sitting waiting and hoping my old love would bring me closure. It doesn't work like that. We have to gift it to ourselves, with or without explanation of where things went wrong. You don't have control over making the person stay but you do have control over whether or not you stay in grief. Be like a Phoenix and rise again. It will be difficult at first but life goes on. You gave as much as you could but it didn't work out. Remember that you can never be too much for someone who can't get enough of you or too little for someone who sees your worth.
The main reason a breakup is so hard is that it disrupts life as we know it. We usually plan life around our partner and so its hard to readjust. Those first few weeks or month (even years for some of us) will suck because we can't go back to what we know. But look at it as an opportunity. Life happens for us and even though we might not understand it in the moment, we have to believe that this setback is a set up for something major.
submitted by Mode2345 to BreakUps [link] [comments]

2020.09.26 12:51 slistherine “A Person In Search Of A Vision”

I’m in the midst of watching The Mask Of Zorro, so the reference in the title felt mandatory.
I’m a 25F looking for a goddamn vision. Which really translates into “I have no direction in my life”. My story is rather long and repetitive, so I’ll summarize the main problems:
•My self worth is heavily (HEAVILY) dependent on my academic achievement/success. Which is a problem... when you dropped out of college. A heavy mix of depression, anxiety, lack of general social/college survival skills and an assault in my second year was the perfect cocktail to send my (previously) okay grades into the Great Black Void of Academic Failing. Rather than acknowledge I needed a help/break from school, I just scraped my way through and dropped my 4th year. I’m the daughter of immigrant parents & first gen— leaving school felt like the ultimate shame.
•I’ve NEVER known what I wanted to do. I feel like every career I think of I’ve either romanticized or I just hate outright. Things I’ve wanted to do: Nat Geo Photographer, Farmer, anthropologist, psychologist, Wildlife veterinarian, travel guide. I’ve noticed that the majority of my “dream careers” seem to involve working with people/animals and (most importantly) away from a desk, with a healthy balance of the outdoors. I’ve always known I’ve hated the 9-5 office gig and finally working one really cemented the fact that I hated them. I don’t think I’ve ever daydreamed of fist fighting as many people as I did in that job— even in my early retail years.
•I want to help so badly it’s suffocating me. One of the main reasons I hated that 9-5? I couldn’t explain to myself what the point of the job was. It didn’t “help” people— it provided a service ofc, but no one really seemed to benefit but the company. They often overcharged (at least IMO) services, underpaid their independent contractors, were constantly overworking their employees. I cannot tell you the amount of times I told my boss that she was worth more than this job. ME, a lowly employee, reminding HER, a superior, of her worth. Honestly, watching her go through it just made me want to run more. I’m wasting 5 days a week at Satan’s PlayPlace listening to customers scream at me that I’m incompetent for... what? For fucking capitalism? To make my bosses money? My job made no difference. The world would be exactly the same with or without it. I’m not looking to become famous— I just want to know that the few years I spent here were well spent. That all this shittiness was worth something, at least. If I’m going to stress, at least let it be over something that makes the goddamn world a better place.
I don’t know where to start. It’s been ~5 years since I dropped out. I’ve been taking jobs as they come, kind of just listlessly functioning. I’ve rejoined my local CC but it’s gonna take me ~4 yrs to finish that BA (trust me, academics are a mess) and honestly, I’m losing my patience to finish it. I’m tired of being broke. I want to start a career but I literally have no clue how to move forward bc I feel so worthless without that BA. I can’t bring myself to update my LinkedIn or anything of the sort bc I don’t know how to make myself an attractive, competitive candidate WITHOUT that BA.
Is there any way I could find a career where I can: help others, make decent money, and have room to grow? It’s not that I don’t want to work— I love the idea of being a career woman whose biggest complaint is about “not finding love” in her cute ass loft apartment rather than a depressing, broke chick who cries in her workplace bathroom.
Please help me make my dating life my biggest problem.
submitted by slistherine to findapath [link] [comments]

2020.09.26 05:44 JackBrightScD Future Content - October Edition


October is wrapped in mystery, but shows promise. Our current events are:
4th PVP Tournament, AKA "War of the Cats" Cake Fight Event wrap up Glory Trials wrap up Possible small update with UI changes Fix for Raijin costume to work with Dragon Cleaver costume
Coming soon from a test server near you:
Fable of the Thunderstorm Event - Mysterious Coin rewards! That's right, we now know what the coins are for- by using different combinations of collected coins, players can exchange them for rewards. The ultimate reward is a shiny new legendary sword back piece costume. Not a weapon skin, sadly, but still pretty cool. There are currently some bugs with 4 coins that the devs are aware of and working to fix. Yellow and Purple Cake Coins (if you had all level 3 villagers before glory trials update, neither coin was obtainable) and Purple and Green Candle Coins (currently all villagers are maxed and farms are stuck at level 14).
Pet Evos, continued!
The pet evo update landed in September, and now we may be looking at another for the remaining evos that we know about in October during a similar feast event. This includes the highly anticipated Wolf, Proto, and Thunder King Dragon evos. More information will made available when it's released. For now, no specific dates or details have been revealed.
From one player to another about the cat update fiasco: Some of you know this and some don't, but I'm just a regular player. My main is a druid, Trufax, on the NA server. I've been playing since launch, and I'm a mod on the community discord. Recently, the pet evo update hit and a lot of players accidentally used quite a bit of resources before the event was truly live. As a result, they lost a lot of resources they needed to help them obtain the new evo pets, and the compensation that came out was deemed lackluster by many affected.
I'm sorry for your troubles, I really am. As much as I wish everyone can obtain the new pet and evolve it, I know for some it just won't happen. The compensation may seem diminished, but it was something- you still got some extra pets for fodder out of it! Still, as a cautionary tale, this is good for all of us. New updates can occasionally be delayed for hours or days after maintenance- please be careful about using items and currency until you see a visual confirmation of an event being active. If you're not sure, visit our community discord for live updates!
As a final note, the upcoming wolf pet may be available in the same format as cat, which means: SAVE THOSE FEASTS! AGAIN!
Have fun! For more information, please visit the community discord!
submitted by JackBrightScD to UlalaIdleAdventure [link] [comments]

2020.09.26 01:50 Colourblindness The Polaris Experiment- Part V- final

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V- final
“The monoliths, gateways to the True World… and you’re saying one of them is close by?”
It infuriated me to no end that this was all Stephen Leng cared about. Not the safety of my sister; or the fact that all of our lives were in danger from supernatural forces beyond our universe. All he was concerned about was this scientific discovery and its implications on how he could use this to experiment on me and my sister.
“It could be, maybe. Derleth Valley is where I think it might appear soon. In the visions of the True World that I have seen, that’s where it often takes me and Danielle,” my sister told him eagerly.
It disgusted me even more so that she was willing to offer to help him, risking her life again for this strange crusade.
“I don’t think we should be gallivanting across the countryside for some supposed giant rock. Our situation here is far more dire,” I commented.
Surprisingly, Leng agreed with me.
“We don’t know how powerful the influence of the Dream Eaters is, but one thing is for certain… they haven’t left this hospital. It’s the only advantage we have. So let’s figure out how to stop them, and worry about the gateway later,” he said.
Jessica was about to make a response when we heard another loud shriek from the halls. The spiders were finding more willing prey in the behavioral health ward. And each time Jessica and I went on the hunt, there would be more of them.
My mind was racing to think of a way to put a stop to the creatures. And then I thought of our gift. The one that allowed us to travel between dimensions. Could this be the way for us to trick these monsters?
“Mister Leng, give us one more chance to go into the True World. Perhaps we can destroy the monolith from inside the other dimension. Perhaps that will eliminate the threat here,” I told him boldly.
Truthfully I didn’t want to go back. But this time it was going to be different. It had to be.
“We can go together this time. Jessica and I can go into the True World and find a way to destroy it together. It’s the only way,” I said grabbing my sisters hand.
Leng looked at us both, surprised that we had the courage to face such unspeakable evil. But we were out of options. The Dream Eaters would take away everything if we didn’t act soon.
“I’ll inform Doctor Kelse.”
When we were alone, Jessica looked at me worriedly. I knew what she was thinking.
“We may not come back this time. It could… it could suck us in when the gate closes. Are you sure you want to be trapped in that dark hell again?” she asked. Her lips were trembling.
It took all the strength I had to not shudder and burst into tears. To be in that same nightmare, this time with a possibility of never escaping. It was the most dreadful thought imaginable to me.
But I stifled a smile and held her hand. I looked over toward her amputated arm and tried to not imagine her losing more of herself just because we were going back to this hellscape. We could lose our very lives. But I knew my sister would go anyway even if I objected.
It was better for us to do it together, even if it was all for nothing.
Half an hour later we were taken to an isolated chamber. The monsters from beyond hadn’t managed to reach this area of the ward yet, but our time was running short. Already 13 people had been driven insane by the monsters, and if Doctor Kelse was any indication, he too was suffering from nightmarish hallucinations caused by the temporal spiders.
His hands were shaky and it took him longer than usual to set everything up. He kept looking in the corners as though he thought the room was closing in on us. It made me nervous to imagine he would administer the drugs to us.
“Could we get a few nurses to assist?” I asked, trying to not offend him.
Leng has finally gotten a few friends from a nearby prison to stop by and offer assistance in Security. But honestly I’m not sure it helped much.
As the machinery was moved into the room to keep us protected, the soldiers began to act strangely as well. The spiders were moving in and out of the walls, they were melding with the soldiers bodies. At first I wasn’t sure if it was the heightened drugs I had been given or something supernatural, but a few moments later the reality was evident. The Dream Eaters were using their reality splicing abilities to move in and out of these men, cutting them like Swiss cheese.
Then my vision blurred again and instead I saw the men were turning their weapons on each other. Riddling each other with bullets. They were hardly able to protect themselves, let alone anyone else.
Kelse and the staff scrambled to close the doors. But I failed to see the point. These nightmares could move in between dimensions, destroy us using our own fears. It was pointless. Our only hope was to get back to the True World.
I turned to Jessica and we didn’t even have to speak to another. We knew the only hope we had was to rely on one another.
I injected the needle straight into her amputated arm, as she did the same on my right side and we were transported together.
The world dimmed in color. The chaos around us faded away. And then we were alone in a dark room, only the light of our aura to guide us. It felt like we were falling. Drowning, hardly able to breathe. I saw the reflection of Jessica’s past lives and my own in an endless cascade of mirrors as we kept going down into the depths of the True World.
We weren’t entirely alone, I realized as our feet settled on dark green pastures again. The old souls we once had were there to guide us. To help us fight.
The air was electric and alive with power. I could sense the landscape trembling before us as we moved together.
In the True World, my sister has her arm back again and was able to move faster. It was almost a miracle. But I knew better than to think this dark and deadly dimension had anything pleasurable to offer. It was clear we were being led into a trap.
I can safely say that for a multitude of reasons. One the monsters we often saw plague us when we traversed this plane were gone. And two, we were easily making it to our destination without any obstacles in our path.
Something beyond our understanding was guiding us, and it shook me to my core to realize our fates were not in our hands.
My sister could feel it too. Each step forward was not our own. We were in a different world, being brought like lambs to the slaughter.
A path appeared before us. We could see the Rehab center and it was glowing with a light from beyond death. Something from the dark sky above was descending. At first it looked like drops of rain.
Then as we got closer I realized it was crystals. Long thin black crystals smashing into the hospital. As they hit the cement ceiling, hundreds of microscopic spiders pushed their way out, quickly skittering into different holes and tunnels. Struggling to find new victims to feed on.
Jessica and I paused as we got toward the entrance. “Why is our path leading us here?” she asked.
I didn’t know. But instead of seeing it filled with victims and patients, it was a dark graveyard. Hundreds of souls taken and smothered and held by the Dream Eaters. Their goal was not even something we could comprehend. Was it to just stir our understanding? To communicate? Were they even hostile?
Who could say?
The door opened to the clinic and a rush of stiff cold air care toward us, and then a voice. Beckoning us to step in.
Vessels/vssls/ess/ of/o is/ Nyarfet, enter the w/oMb,” it said in low shriek. It was a dozen different voices, all speaking the same cry. Urging us to come forward.
The walls and floors were covered in the spiders. They slowly trickled out of the way as we made our way to the main auditorium. There were so many of them. Thousands. Maybe millions. And then Jessica and I saw them begin to converge toward the center of the room.
Merging into a single terrifying being.
“Children. Spirits of the Esthos. Do you come here to destroy? Or to serve?” the voice asked.
I could feel the power inside me beginning to wane. We were losing our connection.
Flashes of the real clinic came in and out of my vision. I saw Leng and the others, desperately trying to hold back the Dream Eaters with fire throwers and military rifles.
Jessica clung to me and we spoke together.
“This is not how we are going to die!”
Somehow we knew what to say. How to fight. Our past lives were also there, giving us strength.
“You and your kind do not belong here!!!” we screamed to the monsters.
We held together. And a force from beyond us emerged. It was white and beautiful, like an angel. But with a thousand eyes and wings. It had no body.
It had no form, except skin and eyes and endless wings. Brightly moving toward the demon.
The building shook. We were being pushed toward the real clinic. Jessica and I saw it happening and somehow using whatever supernatural gift that was instinctively given to us we pushed back.
“You DeLay the InEvitAbLe!!” The voices shouted. The clinic was being pushed into some kind of black hole.
I saw nurses and staff scrambling for their lives, clawing to the ground as they were sucked in. Unable to stop its insatiable hunger.
Leng and the military pushed back. They retreated as I felt my body fall into shock. The connection between us and the True World was fading. We were being pulled back.
Jessica screamed and the ground beneath us began to melt. The world, reality itself was collapsing here and now.
“Danielle!!” she screamed. Behind her, her old self screamed to my old life. Our futures and our pasts were converging in this single moment. To destroy Nyarfet.
The light and the darkness mixed together. And we lost everything. I felt my spirit leave my body. From not just there. But from everywhere. Every version of myself was ripped apart as the monsters fought.
And then it was all gone. All of it.
I don’t rightly know what happened after that. We were floating for the longest time. Not here nor there.
I think the best way to explain it is we were both dead. Our bodies were gone. Our spirits lost in the void.
Then we were back. In a Clean Room, being monitored by Doctor Kelse and several other men I didn’t recognize. I could hardly feel my body or understand my surroundings. It was like coming up from drowning again. That constant hum of the void, the Dream Eaters. The endless possibilities of evil around us, it was always there.
But now we were here.
“Danielle? Jessica?” A voice said through an intercom. It sounded familiar.
“Stephen?” I asked in a whisper. It didn’t sound like my voice.
I looked down at my hands. My skin looked different. My body felt different.
“This is going to be a lot to take in,” Leng said through the intercom.
The date is now September 2020. Jessica and I were dead for almost half a year. And in that time, what was left of Stephen Leng and the Janus Project is now dead. They’ve lost the support from the military. They have nothing except the warrants for their arrests. Yes, they were blamed for the losses at the clinic. One hundred and thirteen people died that day. And the others have yet to be found. The entire clinic was destroyed and the radical experiments of Doctor Kelse were blamed.
Thanks to that same doctor though, they found a way to bring us back from the void. To be able to be placed into new fresh bodies. According to Leng, they were found in the Dunwich cemetery. Under the same gravestones as our ancestors. Fresh, faceless bodies that gradually became ours.
They are still foreign to me and Jessica even now as we stand here at this funeral. Which by the way is our testimony to saying goodbye to our old lives. The threat has subsided for now. The Dream Eaters left when we died. Stephen theorized that they were connected to the dimensional experiments as well.
Which by the way, were ultimately a waste of time. We never found that damned monolith. Nor Meredith Parker. All of this feels like it was a waste.
But one thing is a ray of hope. The fact that my sister and I came back from the dead. We defied the odds.
We came back to fight.
And this fight is far from over.
submitted by Colourblindness to nosleep [link] [comments]

2020.09.26 01:03 die247 Does anyone know how to go about hosting Dynmap on a separate web server to the server/PC that is hosting your minecraft server?

Does anyone know how to go about hosting Dynmap on a separate web server to the servePC that is hosting your minecraft server?
Hey guys,
So, I've looked around for some guides on this, but have found nothing useful - basically, what I'm wondering is how you achieve what this server has done with it's dynmap, where it's accessible publicly and is protected from DDoS attacks via Cloudflare:
Now, I'm a junior web developer, so I know a little about how to host a website... but the kind of web apps and development I do are nothing like how Dynmap works (i.e. normally functioning via making queries/commands to a REST API), so I'm at bit of a loss here.
The one idea I have is to simply copy the files from the web directory that dynmap has onto a hosted cloud web service provider like AWS or Azure, and then try to follow the guides that dynmap has here to set it up to host via an external web server.
There are a few problems with this approach though...
  1. I don't think this would actually work - All the documentation for dynmap points to it expecting the minecraft server and web server to be running on the same machine, which means trying to host a "static" copy of the dynmap files might not work.
  2. This would not have the live update features - Copying the files like this would mean that the tiles would not only not be updated, but none of the other live features would work either...
In addition to this, my choice to use the HD map templates might result in high costs to host on a cloud based web service, but this is something I can change by removing some of the map types, and reducing the rendering quality:
At the moment the map is setup to be publicly viewable via the internal web server that dynmap uses by default (port forwarded), but the issues here are:
  1. This is done via Dynamic DNS - which means ultimately I'm exposing my home network to potential DDoS attacks or other malicious issues if I share the address around at all.
  2. Performance/network issues - The network here is limited in speed, especially upload wise, which would likely result in poor performance.
  3. It is not HTTPS - Again, not very secure.
Anyway, this is my question really; has anyone else here tried to host Dynmap separately to the server that runs your Minecraft server? Especially would like to hear from anyone who has set up Dynmap like the smpearth guys above have!
For a little more context; if you didn't realise it from when I mentioned the port forwarding, yes, I'm hosting the server myself from a PC that has been port forwarded in my home network. There is then Dynamic DNS configured via https://www.noip.com/ so that external players can type in made-up-namehere.ddns.net as the server address instead of the IP. This also means if and when the public IP of the router changes, it updates automatically.
This is why I'd rather not share the link to map publicly yet, as via a simple bit of looking in the developer console they will know the IP for my router and could then do annoying things like perform DDoS attacks...
So, anyway, Thank you in advance to anyone that has ideas!
Edit: I figured out a solution that works for me, I bought a domain from google domains, and then changed it to use cloudflare for it's DNS nameservers instead of Google's (this provides the proxy and DDoS protection etc that I'm looking for.)
The first thing I did is update the port forwarding for the map so that any requests to port 80 on my router are forwarded to the 8123 port that dynmap uses. I will try and change this at later date, as this prevents any other web service running from this network (need a reverse proxy to handle referring different dns requests to different web servers), realistically though, if I want to host a web site I would do it from a cloud service and just have it use the domain name I now have, so really this probably isn't an issue.
Then once I changed the domain to use cloudflare for it's dns name resolution, I configured a simple CNAME record that points towards the DDNS address of my server, so the map now gets accessed . This means that yes, my servers IP address is out there and can be accessed via the DDNS address, however, unless I shared this DDNS address instead of the cloudflare dns it's unlikely anyone would find it. I setup the CNAME so that when the address "map.[mydnsnamehere].net" is requested, cloudflare proxies to [myddnsnamehere].ddns.net and returns the results as HTTPS (although cloudflare's proxy server is making the request as http in the "back", and will continue to do so until I bother to set up a reverse proxy at home that uses something like letsencrypt to get SSL set up.)

submitted by die247 to admincraft [link] [comments]

2020.09.25 19:59 CloudIsTheDragonborn Beginners Jump Start Guide - Level 1 to COSMOS in One Week

Good Day. The game has changed a lot since many guides were written, and some information needs to be updated. Also a common question on this sub is "what do I do." This will hopefully get you started. (I recently started a new account, my third one, and I got to experience first hand what is different, and how to make the most of the changes.)
I call this "Level 1 to COSMOS in One Week" but you can do it in much more or less, depending on how much time you invest. I was able to take on COSMOS content on my new account in two days. It's been about a week now, and I'm doing fine in CHAOS quests.
This is not a "how to play" guide. This is a "what to do" guide. For information on how to play the game (mechanics, team building, yada yada...) and do some things mentioned in this guide (limit breaking, for example) refer to the in-game guide or this sub. I will attempt to keep this short and to the point. (EDIT: Sorry, it's not short, but it is to the point.)

First steps, day one: Get thru the tutorial, is obviously first. This is mostly auto-guided and takes about half an hour. You get a free auto-gold ticket for one of three characters, and it does not matter which one you get. You will also get a free multi draw on the "start dash" banner of Cloud, Lighting, and Squall. It doesn't matter who you get (you're not gonna use any of those characters anyway right now.) End of the tutorial (first chapter) you will receive 10,000 gems (ie two multi draws.) This is what matters, sort of. You can reroll your account if you do not get an LD weapon here, but there is another way (likely faster, potentially more time consuming if bad RNG.)
First banner draws: We need to make clear before moving on: Always use gems for multi draws. Never ever ever (EVER) use gems for single draws (this is what tickets are for, and they will be used first automatically in single draws. Do not single draw with 500 gems when tickets have been exhausted. Save for multi draws and guarantee a 5* weapon.)
Your first banner is going to be a Burst (BT) character, and it must be the one that has that characters BT, LD and EX weapons. (Don't go for a "favorite" here. Get the newest character with a Burst weapon. After you've done this, you can draw for whoever you like. This is a "jump start" guide, so your first character needs to be top tier.) Check the banner information carefully. The BT character appears on 4 banners, but the EX and LD are only one one. Your next 8+ multi draws will also be on this banner. Check the banner expiration date and make sure you have enough time to clear 7-10 story chapters and still make your draws on this banner. Don't worry about any other banners right now. The BT character has 5 weapons on this banner and you need them all. A 15cp, 35cp, 70cp (EX), 90cp (LD), Burst (BT.) You also want duplicates. The more the better. If you spend 50,000 gems and are missing the EX, LD, or BT weapon, I suggest rerolling here. You need the G tokens (20 per draw) for something else. You don't want your first banner to be a 75k gem pity (meaning, after making 15 multi draws, if you are missing a weapon, you can buy it.)
Important: Lock at least one copy of your weapons when you draw them. You don't want to sell accidentally. It's happened to many players. Don't be one of them. Unlock them only when you're ready to sell them (duplicates need to be unlocked for limit breaking. More on that later.)
First quests: Jump right into the story mode quests. Just clear them in normal mode for now. You'll need to do a couple lost chapters to unlock some story, so do them as the game prompts you to recruit specific characters from lost chapters. Don't worry about the current lost chapter just yet. There's no need to accumulate the 50k+ gems before drawing. The sooner you land the LD weapon, the faster you'll be able to move. Gather 5,000 gems then place your multi draw. Equip the LD when you get it, even instead of the EX or Burst weapons. Generally speaking LD weapons have AoE HP attacks, and you will want that skill for fast clearing of trash quests. The EX isn't going to help you here due to its charge time, and Burst is not an efficient form of farming. You're looking to clear 3 waves in 3 turns on 3 LD skill uses.
Burst Necessity: The reality is you'll be fine without a Burst weapon, but early on when you don't have a lot of character to choose from, it helps trivialize some pretty tough fights, including Cosmos quests (though there are requirements other than just having a Burst for Cosmos.) If you want the fastest ride to end-game content, get a Burst weapon on day one. You only "need" it this one time. When you have a deep roster, Burst often just becomes a nice bonus.
Banner weapons: As you draw, you will get weapon duplicates. You need these to "limit break" your weapons. For every 1 missing duplicate, you can use 4 power stones in its place. More on that later. You don't have enough materials yet for it to even matter, but your next task will fix that. Just remember that the Burst character has 5 weapons and you need them all from the banner. The five weapons are 15cp, 35cp, 70cp (EX), 90cp (LD), Burst (BT).) It's very unlikely you won't get the 15cp and 35cp weapons many times over. This is actually very important for maximum limit break of all your weapons. We'll revisit this later, but be aware of the weapons you are aiming for on a banner.
Assess where you are after 50k gems. You do not want to use G tokens to buy an EX or LD that you didn't draw, at least not on your first banner. There are two options now if you're missing the LD weapon: 1) Start over and try again, hoping for better draws. 2) Keep doing quests and spending multi draws until you get the LD. It's up to you. There are a lot of gems available, and you have no power stones right now, so it's not a bad idea to keep drawing on this one banner if you don't feel like rerolling your account.)
Friends: Early on, a strong friend unit can really help in tough spots. They don't matter much for trash quests, but difficult boss fights become much easier if you can swap in a friend with a burst for some big damage. Make a point to follow a bunch of players. Follow back those who follow you for some additional friend turns. (Mutual following gives each of you 5 friend turns instead of 3.) As you get stronger, you'll start to notice which friends are not keeping up with your needs and you can unfollow them. Keep your own selected friend unit up to date as well. Equip new weapons or passives on your friend unit as you get them for your main character, too. This is not automatic.
Mogs Gym and Cycle quests: You need to upgrade your character. Lets start with crystal level, the most important upgrade you can make to your character. Level, character boards, and summon boards won't help much if you're not at a minimum of crystal level 60. Head over to the "events" quests and look for the cycle quest that matches your BT characters crystal color. Start with the level 10 quest and run it a few times. Raise your crystal level and attempt the level 40 quest, then the level 70. (This can potentially be quick and easy with a good friend, if you're not strong enough yet.) Level 70 quest will be your primary farming stage. You can do this as you're farming story quest for gems. Mix it up and don't get bored.
Sometime early on in your quests, head over to the mogs gym events. The quests are very easy, but offer a lot of materials for leveling up. There are a few rare items like power tokens and armor tokens that you need to pick up, but besides those, you want every high crystal they have, as well as a bunch of high shards and orbs. Don't get any of the crystal types you've been accumulating in the cycle quests. They are easy to farm.
Now that you have high shards and crystals, you can level up beyond 50, and mogs gym will have given you enough crystals to level up to 70 (I think it gives you enough to level 70 one character of each crystal color). It's just a matter of continuing the cycle quests for the remaining low tier crystals. Level up the other two characters who were on the banner you drew on as well (more on them later, but get their crystals leveled up to 70.) Cycle quests give high EXP for raising your character level, too. Get that to 70 as well.
Take a look at any "player" or "event" missions as well as the "panel missions." Don't focus too hard right now, but knock out any that you can just to stay on top of them and help gather gems and materials.
G Tokens (First banner): Now for those G tokens. You need to buy the book of ruin (the red one) with 200 G tokens (acquired after placing 10 multi draws.) You do not want to buy any missing weapons with those G tokens, which means you don't want any missing weapons in your draws. In the future, this won't matter as much, and you can buy the missing weapons if you need to. Your very first banner you must get every weapon with multi draws. 200 G tokens need to be spent on the book. (Yes, you need the book. Remember this is a "jump start".) If you spent more than 50k gems on a banner, you can buy a power stone with an additional 100 G tokens, or if you wanted to keep drawing for a Burst, and have an additional 200 G tokens, get another book of ruin. (Keep in mind the Burst weapon is available on 4 banners, so you don't need to chase it on this banner if you intend to draw on another banner. You can try your luck on that banner, and then decide where to keep spending gems if you still don't have it.)
Summons: You're going to want to level up your summons fairly soon (does not need to be right away, but don't put it off too long.) I recommend starting with Ifrit, then Brothers or Odin. Ifrit offers a big attack stat boost. "Trials of Ifrit" in the World of Illusions is where you'll get your summon to level 20, and it takes quite a bit of farming. From there "Ultimate Ifrit" will allow you to level Ifrit up to 30. Each summon has their own. Eventually you'll farm for summon board points, but that is for another tutorial. It's not necessary until Chaos level quests. Begin by getting Ifrit to level 20 and some short time later work on getting to level 30. If a boss absorbs fire, Ifrit will actually cause you problems if you summon him. Odin does not have an element so he makes a great 2nd summon (also has a good blessing for non magic users.) Brothers is great choice, as is Shiva. Eventually you'll level up every summon.
Golden Cactaurs: You will run out of gil trying to upgrade all your weapons and armor. The golden cactaurs cycle quest is a quick way to earn gil. Farm it as you need gil. (Eventually you'll do co-op, buy orbs, and sell them for gil instead, but that is a ways off from where you are now.)
Armor upgrades, novice missions: Now that your character is max level and you've obtained all their weapons, it's time to make sure you have weapon passives obtained, and you have the CP available to equip it. You need 20 armor tokens for this next part, and you should have a few in your inventory already. If not, check out some of the "missions" and see what you can do to pick up what you need.
When you have the 20 armor tokens, go into the armor token exchange and find the BT character you're building. If the character you're building is recruited during the main story, you'll need to buy 4 copies of the armor at 5 tokens each. If your character is recruited during their lost chapter, or is the current character event going on, you'll only need to buy two, and the other two can be obtained thru the event or lost chapter.
Go to enhancements and limit break one copy of the armor three times with the duplicates. Level it up with orbs and gil, and it will turn from gold to blue. Equip the armor.
Move now to the novice missions. You need to complete them to unlock the ability to earn character points. If you complete the current lost chapter before doing the novice missions, you'll need to re-do some of it to gain the character points (more on that in a minute.) When the novice missions are complete, move to the next step (the next step is actually OK to do first, if you want.)
Weapon upgrades, character boards: This will be the most time consuming part, especially if you didn't get a lot of weapon duplicates. It may require more quests for more gems spent on a different banner just for earning power stones (or more books.) Power stone shortage is very common in this game. Get used to it.
Before upgrading the character boards, lets make sure you're "MLB." You'll want all of your weapons to be at their maximum limit break (which is three limit breaks each) and fully leveled up.
Start by leveling up the 15cp weapons for all three characters that were on this banner. Hopefully you got 4 duplicates of each weapon and don't need to spend power stones on them. When the weapon has turned from gold to blue and has a check mark on the bottom left, you can safely sell these 15cp weapons and get 4 power stones back. Do the same thing with the 35cp weapons, unless you got less than three copies. If you got less the three, skip the 35cp for now and level up the LD weapon, using duplicates and any power stones you got back by selling the 15 cp weapons. When its blue with a check mark, sell it. Maximum limit break the 35cp when you can. Do it sooner than later. At some point in this process, level up the Burst weapon but DO NOT sell it (lock your weapons.) This is the weapon you'll keep equipped. You don't need to limit break with duplicates or anything, you just level it up with orbs (a lot of them.) Get it to level 50 and you're good to go. When the LD is MLB, equip the Burst weapon. Equip all your weapon passives. (Cost of 20cp each, except for the LD, which costs 0cp. This is why you bought and leveled up the armor. You needed available CP to equip these passives.)
Very Important: It's time to level up your EX weapon. Follow the same process, but when it's blue, DO NOT sell it. Not yet, anyway.
Most characters won't get a burst weapon, and the EX will be the weapon they will keep equipped. For your burst character, though, you will end up selling this EX, but not until you realize it, and then max limit break that realized weapon.
Realization: Use the book you bought to realize your blue EX weapon in a similar way you have been limit breaking them (the in-game guide on this is pretty easy to follow.) You will then see a + on the weapon icon and you will have obtained one ingot. Go ahead and use that ingot to limit break the newly realized weapon the same way you would limit break a weapon with power stones. You now have an "EX+" weapon.
You will notice that you need two more ingots to reach a max limit break for your EX+ weapon. This is where you will need to spend some time seeking out materials. For a moment though, pause and lets collect some character points. This will make getting realization materials a lot easier.
Go to the current active lost chapter and character event. Finish all the quests here in normal and hard mode that you are able. You'll need to repeat some quests to reach 5000 points, but you must get all 5000 points. (Chaos, level 180 quest can be skipped for now.) After completing all stages, the easiest way to get more points (in a lost chapter) is to do the highest level "quick encounter." This is usually a green node right before the last gold one. For the character event, do the highest level quest you are able to complete quickly. After doing the lost chapter and character event, you should have 10,000 points.
Head over to the enhancements page. In the training boards section, you can use those character points to complete character boards. You'll quickly notice that you are only able to do two boards. Don't worry, you'll come back to that very soon. Equip the new passives you got from the two character boards and we'll move on. (Character boards also give you more CP to equip these passives.)
Check yourself: At this point you should have an MLB 15cp, 35cp, EX, LD, and Burst weapon equipped. You should be crystal level 70, level 70, and have two character boards done. You should have the base 5* armor MLB as well.
Healing: The banner you drew on may not have a healer. Up until now, it's quite likely that you didn't even need one if you followed this guide (most of the time, the enemies don't even get a chance to act.) You can get thru Cosmos without letting the enemy act, but the team you happen to have is a big factor in that. For now, expect to take some HP damage. If one of your party members is a healer, you're fine. If not, you can either draw for one, if one is available (usually there is at least one healer available) or in the short term, you can bind Alexander summon and level him up. He will give you 10 turns of healing when your HP drops below a certain amount (80%, I think), one time. Should be good enough to get thru level 150 stages.
More ingots: Now you need to get two more books, which will lead to two more ingots.. On the lost chapters tab, scroll down until you're at Fang's lost chapter or later. You need to make sure you're doing lost chapters that have a Cosmos stage available. Look at the banner for the lost chapter. If there is a cosmos stage, you'll see red and blue page and nugget images as part of the banner. Complete two lost chapters up to the Cosmos, level 150 stages to earn 20 pages. (10 each Cosmos stage.) If you completed the cosmos stages for the current active lost chapter and event, you'll have another 20 pages. If you have not, go back and do that now (or choose two additional older lost chapters Doesn't matter.) Check elemental and attack resistances on the lost chapter bosses and make sure your party is capable of taking this on. If not, choose a different lost chapter.
There are also 10 pages available each chocobo panel mission set. If there is a special event going on, there may be a chocobo panel that you can quickly knock out in a short amount of time. Regular monthly panels require logging in 8 days to complete and aren't an option if you're looking to do this in less than a week.
When you've done this, you should have 40 pages (check missions page to accept your reward.) Go to enhancements and refine those pages into a book. You will then need to realize the EX weapons for two more characters. More than likely, you drew two other EX weapons on the banner you dumped all those gems into, but if not, draw on another banner, or the same one if you would like. Instead of using the ingot on the newly realized weapon, use that ingot on the character you've been focusing on. Using the two books will give you two ingots to make the last two limit breaks (you already made one limit break using the ingot obtained from the first book.) Once you do that and level up with orbs and gil, the weapon will turn from blue to purple. If you have a Burst character, you can now safely sell the EX weapon (returns one ingot instead of 4 power stones.) If you do not have a Burst weapon, you will equip the new purple colored EX+ weapon.
Go back to the character boards. Now that your EX+ weapon is fully leveled, you can complete the third and final character board.
Tidy up: Assess your current main party. You should have three characters all at crystal level 70, level 70. They should all have an MLB 15cp, 35cp, and EX. Your Burst character should have an MLB LD weapon and max level, equipped Burst weapon. Your burst character should have a purple colored EX+ (that you sold after maxing it), and the other two characters have realized EX+ weapons with no ingots used. If you're missing something, take some time to go back and make sure you're at max level. It doesn't need to be right away. You should be able to take on almost any quest with what you have now. As you collect more ingots, you can limit break those other two characters EX+ weapons, or move on to a different character. There are a lot of ways to go from here, and there aren't a lot of wrong choices. You have a solid start to handle 90% of the quests in this game.
Next steps: You have one important daily task, and that is the daily token foray. You'll run this once per day, every day. Your party can easily handle this. In fact, if you use your Burst right away, the cactaur will likely be dead before it gets a turn. Use the tokens from this event to buy red nuggets to refine into ingots. The other tokens can be used for different things, but I suggest tickets. Take note of the bloom token and bloom fragments, though. There are other ways to get these other than the foray token shop (chocobo panel missions and raid rewards) but they are here if you really want to get it now. You will need to sacrifice some nuggets, should you choose the bloom token. (One token and 60 fragments required. Missing any of the 60 fragments won't let you level up a bloom stone.)
Co-op: Your next regular adventure is co-op. Because you have a fully maxed character, you can easily participate in and contribute in the Cosmos co-op. This is the only co-op you should ever do. Run the level 70 or 100 co-op solo once for the one-time gems, but move on to Cosmos co-op (you will need to clear the Cosmos stage first to unlock co-op.) Buy everything in every co-op event token shop that is available. Use your link bells daily for eidojas (more on that, briefly, in a moment.)
Boosted/Just For Fun: Your Burst character will be good to use in 4 events and be considered "boosted." Folks will welcome you into the "boosted characters wanted" rooms, which are usually filled with other boosted characters. Each boosted character in a party earns more rewards for everyone (this is true even in the Just For Fun room.) Boosted characters are any characters who appear on that events draw banner (You will notice in the game lobby, that the text for their stats is blue instead of white.). The event following a new lost chapter will be boosted for the lost chapters character as well (but not the other characters on the lost chapter banner.) Any other characters will not be boosted, and people don't take too kindly if you join a "boosted" room with a non boosted character. Often, people will disband the party. They're looking for maximum loot drops.
Missions: Always pay attention to the missions. Do not leave any "event" mission incomplete if possible. These rewards are gone permanently if you miss them. You're not expected to beat Chaos level quests right away, so you may end up missing out on 5 nuggets and 3 tickets, but don't stress over that. Do all that you can. "Player" missions never disappear. Complete them at your own pace. Chocobo panels usually give you a couple weeks to complete.
Artifacts: Artifacts are a pain to farm. They offer some stat boosts for a certain CP cost. You limit break them the same way you do with weapons. They aren't terribly important right now, but you'll want some as you move into Chaos quests. It costs a lot of gil to farm some good ones, so don't worry too much right now. Be aware that they exist and you will need to take care of it at some point.
Future draws: Have fun with the game. Draw for characters you like, or draw for meta tier. It doesn't matter, and it's your game to play. All characters are useful somewhere, and rarely are do people have regrets about who they leveled up (There are exceptions.... Tidus, but he may get an awesome LD and Burst weapon and be great. Your investment will not have been wasted.) There are quest sets like Abyss and Dimensions End that will require dozens of strong characters. You'll get them in time, so don't worry.
Gem Spending: Keep in mind, when you draw, that you are aiming for a characters full kit. A character missing an EX and/or LD weapon wont do you much good (in hard content.) The general advice here is to save 75,000 gems for a banner and be prepared to spend it all if needed, to get every weapon for a character. You may not need to use that many gems, but you never know. I've spent 75,000 gems on a banner several times. It happens. You will always have a gem shortage, especially when you're done with the story and lost chapters, if you just throw 10k or 15k at each banner hoping to get lucky. Choose a banner and go all in if needed. Use your draw tickets to "see what happens" but expect it to usually take 200-300 tickets for an entire weapon kit.
Wrap Up: This turned out to be a lot longer than expected. I added more than I originally meant to, but I wanted something fairly complete. In closing, just enjoy the game. You can use old favorite characters or maybe you'll find some new favorites. Always ask the good people on this sub if you get stuck on something or have questions.
http://www.tonberrytroupe.com is a really great resource for this game. It includes a future banner timeline, and infographics detailing almost every characters kit. Even long time veteran players often refer to this fantastic website. (Created and maintained by one of our own mods.)

Good luck.
submitted by CloudIsTheDragonborn to DissidiaFFOO [link] [comments]

2020.09.25 19:47 Mode2345 Getting Past Your Breakup

Most of us have been there – a relationship fizzles or implodes, and a heart is left in tatters. Maybe it was a mutual decision, an amicable parting, or maybe it was a betrayal that ended with vitriolic word-bombs exploding everywhere. Whatever form they take, breakups are never easy, and they can leave you feeling like you’ve been run over by a bus. A hole has opened up in your life where there was once cuddles and hand-holding.
In this summary of Getting Past Your Breakup by Susan J. Elliott
why you should put down the phone; why you probably can’t “just be friends” (at least for a while!); and how setting boundaries can expand your world. Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #1: In order to grow after a breakup, make sure you take care of yourself and grieve.
Think back to your first breakup. It was most likely a tortuous, heart-wrenching experience, right? But fear not – breakups can actually bring some positive things with them.
All in all, going through a breakup can be the perfect opportunity for personal growth. To achieve this, you have to look after yourself and properly mourn your old relationship.
When it comes to addressing a breakup, there are three distinct ways to handle it. First, there’s the option of investing a lot of emotional energy into trying to win your ex back. Second, there’s simply pretending that nothing’s happened by continuing with your life as normal. Third, there’s taking the time to reflect on your past relationship and your life in general to deal with your emotions so that you can fully heal. The best solution is the last one, but it’s by far the hardest. Here are some initial guiding principles to get you started.
From the very beginning, you need to put yourself first. This can prove difficult, especially if you’re used to catering to your partner’s needs. The trick is to treat yourself lovingly; boost your self-esteem by getting a new haircut or an expensive manicure. You could also take on a new hobby or work on expanding your circle of friends.
Most importantly, don’t try to block out the pain by engaging in behaviors like drug taking or substituting your ex with someone new. Instead, stay in touch with your emotions and work to process through them. Dealing with your feelings in this way will lead to you becoming a stronger person; you’ll trust in your ability to overcome pain and look after yourself.
Next, you’ll learn more about the process of self-care and how to properly grieve – it all begins with putting an end to that toxic relationship.
Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #2: Cut off all contact with your ex and don’t make excuses to communicate.
You and your partner have officially broken up, yet you still spend an unhealthy amount of time waiting for them to message and routinely checking their Instagram page. This behavior is understandable, but it’s not doing you any favors.
To orchestrate a successful breakup, you need to cut all lines of communication completely. That way, your ex will have no influence on your life; you’ll be able to eradicate them from your mind and steadily move on.
It’ll be a challenge to start off with, because you’ll be accustomed to communicating with that person, so the absence of that interaction will inevitably leave a void. Don’t despair, though, as most people reap the benefits of this procedure in no time.
The author had a client who felt as if she couldn’t breathe without her partner. After a mere 48 hours with no contact, she discovered she could breathe easier without him.
However, eliminating contact is only the first part of the battle; the second part is refusing to make excuses to contact your ex. This may prove problematic if your ex-partner wants to continue as friends – you’ll have to just explicitly say no. If you both invested as much energy into the relationship as you could, and still found that it wasn’t working out, then the best course of action is to take time apart to start afresh.
Social media also makes the concept of ending all contact a particularly trying task. You have to fully commit to not contacting your ex by any means – don’t dupe yourself into believing that following their posts on Facebook is inconsequential.
It’s essential to stop communicating with your ex-lover if you want to move on to the next step. This is the process of grieving, which you’ll learn about in the upcoming book summary.
Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #3: Losing a relationship can come as a shock, and there are strong emotions to deal with as you grieve.
Strength is seen as a desirable quality, so most people usually choose to ignore feelings of pain and confusion after a breakup. However, this isn’t going to negate suffering. You need to grieve your relationship so you can learn how to process disappointment.
First, you have to deal with the feeling of shock which comes with losing a relationship. When you’re with someone, you feel safe; hearing another person say they love you every day brings security. Suddenly, that person is out of your life without much explanation.
Those feelings of trust and safety quickly disappear, as well as your plans for a future together. You realize that you invested time and positivity into a relationship that wasn’t right – this is difficult to comprehend, so you’re bound to spend a while in disbelief. It’s normal to initially feel this way, though; eventually, your emotions will surface.
Throughout the grieving process, you’ll have to deal with a number of complex emotions, including regret. Once the feeling of shock fades, you’re likely to be hit with a sense of abandonment and loneliness. This is to be expected – you’ve lost the affection and companionship of someone you hold dear. You may also have to deal with the loss of mutual friends and your ex’s family members, to whom you’d grown close.
These unhappy emotions will come in waves. It’s almost like having a bad cold – you feel ill, dizzy and confused. This experience is mixed with obsessive thoughts like What went wrong? Who’s to blame? It’s both natural and healthy to go through this, so don’t suppress these thoughts; ruminating over the past is your brain’s way of moving forward. This can all be exhausting, so know your limits and look after yourself – more on this in the next book summary.
Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #4: To help you take care of yourself, employ these simple methods.
As you’ve learned, the grieving process can involve spending a lot of time thinking about your past relationship. The key is not to dwell on this for too long – remember to shift your focus back to your own life.
It’s testing to go through the grieving process to get over your relationship. That’s why it’s so important to balance this experience with positive actions.
Think about where you’d like your own life to go. How was your previous relationship holding you back? In what ways would you like to exercise your newly acquired freedom?
Now that you’re no longer with your ex-partner, you may find that you’ve got a lot more time to spend on educating yourself and developing your career. You may even want to use your newfound freedom to meet up with friends or take the daring step of moving to your dream city.
There are some helpful tools for transitioning into this positive way of thinking. Start keeping a journal or schedule “date nights” with yourself to take care of your well-being.
Documenting your feelings in a journal will help you identify how to make your life happier and address all the thoughts that are impacting you negatively. Say you catch yourself thinking that you’re undateable – stop, write the thought down, and think of a positive affirmation to counteract it. “I’m a supportive partner with a great deal to offer,” is wonderfully specific. When it comes to date nights with yourself, designate time for doing activities you enjoy: read a book, take a relaxing bath, or head to the movies.
Now that you understand how to handle yourself after a breakup, you’ll learn how to think about other people who might be affected, such as your children.
Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #5: To help your family cope with the breakup, stay organized and talk to your children.
As most people know, a divorce can have a devastating effect on the kids involved. If your breakup concerns children, help them process the situation by communicating with them and being patient.
Sit down with your kids and explain that as parents, both you and your partner will continue to love them unconditionally. If they ask any questions, refrain from being too specific – your kids don’t need to know details. Instead, keep your answers vague; explain that you’re no longer happy together and don’t want to fight, as it’s not pleasant.
If your children are of an age where they can fully comprehend the situation, you can use this opportunity to illustrate the importance of making changes when a predicament has become unhealthy.
It’s vital to let your children react to the news as they please. If they want to sulk or throw a tantrum, let them. They also need time to grieve and sometimes don’t know the best way to express their emotions.
Organization is essential for maintaining a healthy family life throughout your breakup. Remember to engage in fun family activities and allow your children to partake in the planning; this will create an environment of stability and security for them.
Breakups can be exceedingly painful, but they can also provide an opportunity to find fresh ways to function as a family. Ask your children how they would like to organize living together in this newfound setup.
It’s also important to schedule activities that you can enjoy with your children and without your ex-partner. Reward them if they’re actively contributing to making this new family life a success.
You should now have the tools to help your children through the process, so it’s time to return to focusing on yourself.
Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #6: Make relationship inventories to discover harmful patterns in your relationships.
Presently, you should fully understand how to process a breakup, so it’s time to think about your relationships in general.
A relationship inventory will help you discover unhealthy patterns. Start by noting down all the positive and negative aspects of your relationship and that of your ex-partner.
Think back to the attributes which initially attracted you to your partner but ended up ultimately proving to be detrimental. You might’ve marveled at how organized your partner was, but that soon turned into your partner being both highly controlling and overly critical. Were there any warning signs which surfaced at the beginning of your relationship signaling that there’d be trouble in the future?
It’s essential to write down the elements of the relationship that hurt you most and any wrongdoings that you were responsible for as well. Soon, you’ll be able to identify themes in your relationship: was your partner incredibly distant while you were needy? Did they frequently interrupt you?
Next, make a life inventory which features all of your major romantic relationships so that you can discover the source of these harmful patterns. It’d prove beneficial to you to make a similar inventory which assesses every close relationship in your life.
If your ex was critical of you, you might notice that your mother was once critical of you in much the same way. You may have spent your childhood pointlessly striving for your mother’s approval, and as an adult, you’ve simply transferred that pattern. You’re immediately attracted to demanding, critical partners who you have to continually appease.
The sooner you’re able to identify the source of these harmful patterns and understand how they’re affecting your life today, the easier it’ll be for you to let them go. In the following book summary, you’ll learn exactly how to do this.
Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #7: Identify the situations in which you struggle to set boundaries and learn how to stand your ground.
Think back to your past relationship. In situations where you and your partner didn’t see eye to eye, were you reluctant to say no or disagree? Unfortunately, allowing yourself to be treated like a doormat is pretty common.
Now, consider the current relationships in your life – are there any boundaries that need to be set? To do this, you need to ascertain when and with whom you’re failing to make sure that your interests are heard.
Say a friend always wants you to go shopping with her on Saturdays. This is not an activity you enjoy, and it’s preventing you from satisfying your own needs. Therefore, this is the prime opportunity to stand up for yourself and just say no, without lying or making excuses.
It’s essential that you know how to set boundaries effectively. Remember that a new boundary will only be accepted if there are consequences for not meeting your requirements, as words often fall on deaf ears.
Imagine you have a friend who’s always late when you’ve made plans together. You’ve frequently tried to set a boundary by saying that this is not OK, but they’ve neglected to change their behavior. You’re not required to accept this, so explain to your friend that you’re no longer going to wait. If you’ve planned to drive to a party with your friend and they don’t show up at the allotted time, head to the event without them. This will explicitly show your friend that you’re committed to your interests and that they need to respect them if they want to be around you.
This book summary has hopefully taught you how to be more forthright with your own needs. In the next book summary, you’ll learn about the importance of retaining your independence, especially when you’re in a new relationship.
Getting Past Your Breakup Key Idea #8: Learn to be independent, and if you do find love, don’t sacrifice your passions.
After a breakup, it’s normal to start thinking about when you’ll be ready to return to dating. The answer to this question may seem a little counterintuitive: you’ll be prepared to get back into dating when you’re able to enjoy yourself and no longer feel that you need others to make you happy.
When you’re feeling strong, joyous and independent, you’re more likely to attract the right person than when you’re in a needy and insecure state. If you’re in a place where you’re dependent on a relationship to make you feel socially validated, then you’re likely to settle for much less – you’ll end up with someone who can potentially have a damaging effect on you.
The best course of action is to embrace the loneliness – that way, you can freely choose who you want to associate yourself with next. But when you do find love again, don’t completely abandon the attitude you had while single.
It’s easy to get wrapped up in a new romance, but remember to maintain your own life, too. Continue to meet up with friends and partake in the activities you discovered when you were on your own. It’s important to keep spending time alone as well, as thriving on your own is such a vital, hard-won skill. A relationship is also destined to become boring if you spend every waking moment together; solitary time is good for you and your relationship in general.
Essentially, learn to indulge in self-care and truly get to know yourself. Experiencing a breakup is tough, but if you approach it the correct way, it can be an incredible chance to grow. Whether you get into a new relationship soon afterward or not, you’ll find that you’re a stronger, more independent person because of what you’ve been through.
In Review: Getting Past Your Breakup Book Summary
The key message in this book:
In the long run, going through a breakup can be highly beneficial to you. Instead of ignoring the situation or addressing it in a self-destructive manner, use it as an opportunity to take a good look at your life. Learn how to be happy with yourself first before embarking on a new romance.
Actionable advice
Find a hobby that you enjoy.
If you’re at a loss after a breakup, it’s a sensible idea to preoccupy yourself with a simple activity that won’t be too much of a challenge for you. Consider taking up knitting or learning about woodwork to take your mind off the situation and get past the shock.
by Susan J. Elliott
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2020.09.25 14:50 STThornton New here/road to embracing being a cougar

New here
I've been lurking for a while, and I wanted to say how nice it was to find this group. I'm not a typical woman, and I haven't quite decided if I'm ready to go anywhere near the dating pool, let alone stick my toe in it, but it's still great to hear from other women with similar tastes.
Since I'm new, here's a "short" introduction (in case anyone cares, but I figured it's polite):
I'm a 44 year old woman who's been attracted to younger men (age range 18-25) all my life. Through age of 25, I was never with man older than 21. I noticed even back then that I always like them younger, and despite being young myself, I already realized (and, honestly, worried), that was I rapidly heading into cougar territory. The first time I was strongly attracted to a man of the ripe old age of 25, I was in my thirties.
I got married to an 18 year old at 18. That lasted until I was 20 and he fell in love with a coworker of his. We divorced, but friendly, and on good terms. Spent the next six years enjoying those young'ens as much as I could. At 26, I decided if I ever wanted a serious relationship again, I should focus on more age-appropriate men (a decision that pained my younger-man loving heart). Well, that turned into a disaster. I had a one year relationship from 26-27 and another one from 34-35, and didn't date at all in between.
At 35, I decided to do some reflecting and figured out why dating and relationships didn't work for me. I guess the fact that men literally considered, respected, and liked me as another man (rather than a woman or tomboy) probably should have clued me in long ago. But, you know, hindsight and all. Likewise, I also tended to be sexually attracted to more masculine/roughework with your hands type of men when it came to age-appropriate (for lack of better term) men, but I found that I never really felt any romantic attraction to them. I don't feel secure with them, and constantly trying to be more feminine/less naturally dominant put me in a constant state of anxiety.
Submissive men worship the ground I walk on, but they weren't really what I was looking for, because most of them were on the extreme end of submissive and rather feminine in energy, and often cross into BDSM territory. I have no issues with BDSM, and do like to play with my dominant side from time to time, but only in a sexual way. It's not something I want as a lifestyle or in a relationship. When it comes to sex, I also like being more submissive at times, depending on the mood. And I'm really not into pain or bondage or any of that. More of a sexual servant/slave thing, which requires a highly sexual man, which most very submissive men aren't.
After long deliberation, I decided to withdraw from the dating game completely after that relationship ended (at 35). I haven't made any effort to date since and haven't dated since. I came to the conclusion that I'm simply not what men look for, and I was actually all right with that. I felt more relief than anything else at finally being done dating.
A couple of months ago, I was watching youtube videos, and I stumbled across (of all things) the tiktok kiss your best friend challenge. So ... I clicked. Call me a sucker. I do get romantic from time to time, even if it's rare. And lord and behold, the sight of all those young men sent a surge of giddiness and happiness through me that I hadn't experienced in almost 20 years. My, I hate to say this, but I almost felt alive...lol I noticed that I found the high majority of them very attractive, when before, with men of my own age, I found maybe one per year attractive, at best. I also noticed that strong flutter of romantic attraction that I hadn't felt in ages (well, 19 years). The sexual attration is there as well, but it's much softeplayful than it is with men my age.
I realized what I liked most about those young men is their energy. They haven't really come into their own yet, haven't really turned into the confident male yet. It's that softer, more innocent, shyer, less confident energy that I am really drawn to. Which, seeing how naturally masculine/dominant I am, actually makes perfect sense. A lot of them haven't found their ranking in the natural scale of dominance yet. It's a beautiful mix of the hint of the masculinity they're about to grow into, but there is also still a willingness to submit and follow the lead, but in a very non-feminine way. It's hard to describe.
It hit me kind of hard that instead of withdrawing from the dating scene, I probably should have simply looked for a different kind of man. There's that hindsight again. Oh, well. I'm not sure if I'll ever date seriously again, but I'm definitly planning on actually having sex again, maybe even friends with benefits relationships, now that I figured out that there actually are men out there I'm highly attracted to. I was starting to think there was something seriously wrong with me for not feeling attraction for a single man in over seven years despite an extremely high sex drive (done wore out my toys, and I think I've watched every minute of porn available on the internet by now)
Sorry it got so long.
After reading through a lot of these posts and doing some research online, I have a question for fellow women, though. Cougars often get asked what attracts them to younger men, and after reading their answers and general advice to cubs, I noticed one thing I found very interesting.
I know every cougar is different, but there seems to be a general theme. Cougars often describe an articulate, intelligent, mature, well-dressed man. When I hear the descriptions and advice, the first thing I picture is an older, cultured man, around 45-55 years of age. Business suit or business casual, well-groomed.
Basically, the opposite of a young man.
This kind of surprises me, because I would think that cougars like younger men because they're not those type of men. Is the attraction more in being able to mold a young man into the one you prefer or molding/guiding him, in general? Or is it more of the younger look? Once again, I know women's reasons are different. But it almost seems to me like I'm one of the only women here who likes the young man because he is a young man - aka, not yet the one the majority of cougars describe. If I wanted a man with all those qualities or that kind of energy, I'd probably go for an older man.
It seems to be somewhat of a contradiction to me.
It's very interesting to hear from other cougars :)

Edit: (do I have to write that out?) Thanks for the welcomes and reponses.
I do think I'm interpreting some things wrong. It would be interesting to see what the men think and how they interpret some of the requirements. It was also interesting to see it confirmed how extremely different we women are when it comes to tastes in men.
I figured the masculine/feminine dominant/submissive thing would be misinterpreted. That's why I usually try not to use those terms. I worked with animals my whole life, and the actual dynamic of it versus what humans think when they hear those terms is totally different. The funny part is that humans don't realize that it applies to them the same as it does to animals, and that they actually react the same.
I decided a better term than submissive might be "a remaining hint of childlike innocense". Not yet hardened by life. And certainly not yet hardened into what society expects of a "man". They still react more in ways that come natural to them, rather than trying to use conditioned responses. Most "jocks" and more confident young men, for example, no longer have that childlike innocense. The young man, for example, who got kissed back by a woman he liked and has a hard time containing the giddy excitment that is threatenining to bubble over still has that childlike innocense. He might even let go and gives the air a fist pump. There's still an enthusiasm and awe and joy that us older adults (men and women alike) have often either forgotten about or taught ourselves not to feel too much.
Same goes for confidence/dominance
The confident/dominant type - I have a plan. I'm going to do it. (often accompanied by "try to stop me." The dominant/less confident type - "I have a plan. I'm ready to do it. I know what I'm doing. Just say when. Give me the go ahead, and I'll get right on it." There is that mix of dominance, enough confidence, with a hint of submitting to another authority, a hint of shyness that I was talking about. And at this time (and possibly always), they're ok with leaving the ultimate say to the other. But once they have the ok, they take over. The neutral/balanced types (the healthy middle) - We make a plan together, we make decisions together. We work together. They can shift into more take-charge when needed, but are also happy letting another lead. Sometimes they take charge, other times they let the other take charge. The submissive, more confident type - "I need detailed instructions. Tell me the plan, and I'll do it. I if I have questions, I'll get back to you." They don't like making decisions, they don't like being in charge. But they follow really well, they execute decisions other make really well, even on their own. Unless something goes wrong, then they go back to the person in charge for new directions. The submissive/less confident type - "What do you mean, go ahead? Go ahead and what? How about YOU do it? That would make me feel much better. At least, tell me exactly what you want me to do every little step of the way." They're uncomfortable working on their own, even with instructions. They need constant guidance.
submitted by STThornton to Cougars_Den [link] [comments]

2020.09.25 09:02 clorky123 Is there any all in one Skyrim SE mod pack?

I wanna play modded Skyrim but I've been through the process of installing and managing hundreds of mods multiple times. Last time I did this was last year and it took me a week to make a fully functional Skyrim based on Phoenix Flavour guide.
Unfortunately, my installation is probably well out-dated at this point so I want a new modded Skyrim experience, hopefully without the hassle surrounding the installation and configuration, load order stuff, cleaning stuff etc.
I found that there's Ultimate Skyrim, but that's only for Skyrim LE at this point, and there's really no reason to play Oldrim, since the performance and stability on SE is simply superior.
Is there anything like Ultimate Skyrim? Simple installation, few hours of process at most?
submitted by clorky123 to skyrimmods [link] [comments]

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